• You are currently viewing our forum as a guest, which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community, you will have access to additional post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), view blogs, respond to polls, upload content, and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free, so please join our community today! Just click here to register. You should turn your Ad Blocker off for this site or certain features may not work properly. If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us by clicking here.

[MBTI General] Socializing. Is this all there is?

simulatedworld

Freshman Member
Joined
Nov 7, 2008
Messages
5,552
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w6
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
But I need to go to college to gain enough credibility to change pieces of the world I can't stand, and enough confidence to tell the pieces I don't want anything to do with to fuck off.

Not exactly.

I'll let you in on a little secret: The only real reason to go to college is networking.

Don't get me wrong--college is certainly not a bad idea. It definitely can't hurt, and it can be extremely helpful to some people because gathering together a bunch of people who all want to learn about the same topic tends to produce useful networking connections between those people.

However, remember that college is not a golden ticket to the American Dream. I know lots of people with undergrad degrees who still work bullshit retail jobs because they figured that piece of paper would do all the work.

In reality, choosing a field you want to work in, going out and finding the places where that work is done professionally, and getting involved until you know the right people and understand what to do is the way to advance.

Just know that you're not automatically fucked without going to college, and that a college degree is only what you make of it, and nothing more.
 

FDG

pathwise dependent
Joined
Aug 13, 2007
Messages
5,903
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Enneagram
7w8
That's because you're in Canada. If I go north, I'm also shocked by how alchool seems to play a very central part in all social interactions. You might get something better if you go south, either southern europe or southern america (however, of course, you will get less of other stuff).
 

thisGuy

New member
Joined
Mar 14, 2009
Messages
1,187
MBTI Type
entp
Not exactly.

I'll let you in on a little secret: The only real reason to go to college is networking.

Don't get me wrong--college is certainly not a bad idea. It definitely can't hurt, and it can be extremely helpful to some people because gathering together a bunch of people who all want to learn about the same topic tends to produce useful networking connections between those people.

However, remember that college is not a golden ticket to the American Dream. I know lots of people with undergrad degrees who still work bullshit retail jobs because they figured that piece of paper would do all the work.

In reality, choosing a field you want to work in, going out and finding the places where that work is done professionally, and getting involved until you know the right people and understand what to do is the way to advance.

Just know that you're not automatically fucked without going to college, and that a college degree is only what you make of it, and nothing more.

thats well and good if your gonna live in your own world. if you do want to live in the real world (and as an Exxx, you might want to), you do need first impression thru resume credibitliy and, at the very least, college will get you that.



I think NT's appreciate NF's more than this forum lets on. T's can be downright detached from their feelings but that doesn't mean we don't seek to understand them. What you said was really insightful. I've been gunning for quantity because it's what I interpreted as important for so long. I've been completely ignoring that it makes me miserable.

Is this a feel-o-tard moment? :cheese:

you tard! thats what we got Fs for...quit already!

im gonna guess your in first year? usually everyones trying to fit in when it starts and the most looked upon social norms are adopted by everyone. you could just wait it out for a year for the sieving to take place

also, ill bet you anything that your not alone in these parties. theres at least one more person like you. you could take the first step and start a convo about music or your classes or something with a group...the person who looks up first or listens to everyone else before saying anything is prolly worth a shot...even if you dont make a connection right there, they'll prolly seek you out later on...if your worried about the topics of convo being boring, dont be...as a girl at a college party there are very few things you cant get away with, this is not one of them

there, finally something to do instead of just thinking about it and taking solace is explanations...ive been in college for three years now...first year was fackin retarted. i didnt realize till second year that i was popular for all the wrong reasons (dumbing yourself down is not as rare as you might think)...of all the people i met, i still only hang out with 5-6 dudes and dudettes on a regular basis. all xNxx. we have a hell of a time drinkin, playing, talking...and stuff
 

Saslou

New member
Joined
Feb 1, 2009
Messages
4,910
MBTI Type
ESFJ
Not all ESFx get plastered when out having a good time.

I actually dont drink that often. I went out 2 odd weeks ago and only drank Lemonade and i still had a good time.

Don't get me wrong, place a bottle of Sambuka in front of me and i am up for a really good time, but i also sober up in 2/3 odd hours after starting that stuff. I just don't do it that often. ;)
 

thisGuy

New member
Joined
Mar 14, 2009
Messages
1,187
MBTI Type
entp
no saslou, we are talking about when we are in college and dont really think bout too much other then boobies and booze
 

run

New member
Joined
Dec 27, 2008
Messages
466
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w4
I have qualms about seriously dating anyone who drinks and gets drunk and thinks nothing of it. In fact, I won't. I've always wondered if its just me.
 

Misty_Mountain_Rose

New member
Joined
Jul 21, 2008
Messages
1,123
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
4w5
Not exactly.

I'll let you in on a little secret: The only real reason to go to college is networking.

Don't get me wrong--college is certainly not a bad idea. It definitely can't hurt, and it can be extremely helpful to some people because gathering together a bunch of people who all want to learn about the same topic tends to produce useful networking connections between those people.

However, remember that college is not a golden ticket to the American Dream. I know lots of people with undergrad degrees who still work bullshit retail jobs because they figured that piece of paper would do all the work.

In reality, choosing a field you want to work in, going out and finding the places where that work is done professionally, and getting involved until you know the right people and understand what to do is the way to advance.

Just know that you're not automatically fucked without going to college, and that a college degree is only what you make of it, and nothing more.


+ 10000
 

King sns

New member
Joined
Nov 4, 2008
Messages
6,714
MBTI Type
enfp
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
Not an NT, but I do relate to the OP

I attract this lifestyle- and I think it gets very old very quickly.

Pretty easy to get wasted and talk about it and do it again the next night.

Seems like a pretty boring and redundant activity for these people who are supposed to be social and exciting.
 

Quinlan

Intriguing....
Joined
Apr 6, 2008
Messages
3,004
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
9w1
I wonder sometimes about people who live just for one drunken weekend to the next, I guess maybe there is something missing in their lives and they use alchohol to numb that reality.
 

Misty_Mountain_Rose

New member
Joined
Jul 21, 2008
Messages
1,123
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
4w5
I wonder sometimes about people who live just for one drunken weekend to the next, I guess maybe there is something missing in their lives and they use alchohol to numb that reality.

That's probably more true than most people give credit for.
 

Blank

.
Joined
Mar 10, 2009
Messages
1,201
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w6
That's probably more true than most people give credit for.

This is pretty close to the case for a lot of people, I'm willing to bet. One of my closest friends I've made since I started college started living to get drunk every weekend because he didn't want to deal with a lot of the bullshit he'd been fed throughout his life (his family have absolutely crazy cult-like Christian beliefs, no joke. He believed his preacher could raise people from the dead. No kidding.) He'd always been a little bit of a pothead and a guy who enjoys having a good time, but then he started using the substances as an excuse to deal with life, or he would try to take pills to help give him the motivation to get things done...He pretty much failed out of school because he didn't want to deal with reality. He thought about joining the marines during the process of him dropping out, but because he was told that it didn't look good to quit halfway through the year, he stayed in school and didn't go to any of his classes. I'm pretty sure that now he's given up on the marine idea since they'd only make him into a grunt.

It's pretty sad to see one of your friends go through all of this shit, but I just had to cut him loose and stop caring about him.
 

Randomnity

insert random title here
Joined
May 8, 2007
Messages
9,485
MBTI Type
ISTP
Enneagram
6w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
A - if this is really ALL your friends do for fun, find better friends. seriously, friends are for talking to/having fun with.

B - if not, just avoid most of those times and suggest/plan events that are more to your liking; pool/potlucks/dress-up parties/movies/video game nights/computer game nights/sports/etc etc there are a million things, all generally more interesting than a night of getting wasted, although sometimes its fun to drink during most of those things. Sometimes you have to take the initiative in planning these things though.

I used to like going out and getting drunk but I got bored of it a few years ago, now I get drunk maybe every few months, and not to excess in years, as far as I remember. I don't like pubs/bars.
 

simulatedworld

Freshman Member
Joined
Nov 7, 2008
Messages
5,552
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w6
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
thats well and good if your gonna live in your own world. if you do want to live in the real world (and as an Exxx, you might want to), you do need first impression thru resume credibitliy and, at the very least, college will get you that.

lol don't lecture me about the "real world." I've got a better "real world" job than most of my friends with college degrees.

You can make a first impression through means other than having a degree. That's one method by which some people manage to get their foot in the door at a new company, but if you're already doing professional quality work, you can find a job much more easily than someone with a degree and no real experience.

Point is, real world experience wins out over a piece of paper that says you know what you're doing. College is hugely misrepresented in American culture as some kind of iron lung that only the most destitute of total losers would dare brave the challenges of real life without, but at the end of the day, employers want to know if you can do the job.

If I've been out there doing the job effectively and showing solid profit margins from it while you've been hiding yourself away in academia for a decade to avoid ever having to face the real world, guess what? When you finish school, my resume still looks better than yours.
 

thisGuy

New member
Joined
Mar 14, 2009
Messages
1,187
MBTI Type
entp
Point is, real world experience wins out over a piece of paper that says you know what you're doing. College is hugely misrepresented in American culture as some kind of iron lung that only the most destitute of total losers would dare brave the challenges of real life without, but at the end of the day, employers want to know if you can do the job.

If I've been out there doing the job effectively and showing solid profit margins from it while you've been hiding yourself away in academia for a decade to avoid ever having to face the real world, guess what? When you finish school, my resume still looks better than yours.

cant argue with that.

thats all well and good once you have that experience and are well on your way. but is that something you would recommend as the best course of action to 20 yr olds like me? recently out of high school knowing jack shit about anything except what the public school system taught you

and correct me if im wrong but, atleast in north america, dont you need licenses to practice certain professions? most of these licenses are usually only issued on the basis of a post secondary education.
 

simulatedworld

Freshman Member
Joined
Nov 7, 2008
Messages
5,552
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w6
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
^ I'm hardly older than you at 22.

You do need a license to practice certain professions, and yes, you'll have to go to college for those. I didn't say that college is worthless or can't help you, just that if the only reason you're going is because you feel like you should, and not because you're actually motivated to study and get involved in a certain field, you're wasting an awful lot of time and money.

If you look at college as an opportunity to meet people in your field and not as a chore to get done, it'll help you. If you look at it as something you have to get out of the way in order to graduate into the "real world", your situation is not likely to improve much even after you're done with it.

Personally, I work in music--teaching and performing. I don't make an enormous amount of money yet, but I'm still pretty young and I'm getting by. And I'm out there teaching lessons, playing in clubs, shaking hands, putting up fliers, handing out business cards, and making the right connections to find the income that I need to support myself. And because I do this constantly, I'm getting better and gradually expanding my network of contacts all the time.

It's tough, but doable. My main point here is that, with or without a degree, you need to have a passion for what you're doing--and if you've got that, you'll be fine.
 

avolkiteshvara

New member
Joined
Apr 27, 2009
Messages
893
MBTI Type
YaYa
cant argue with that.

thats all well and good once you have that experience and are well on your way. but is that something you would recommend as the best course of action to 20 yr olds like me? recently out of high school knowing jack shit about anything except what the public school system taught you

and correct me if im wrong but, atleast in north america, dont you need licenses to practice certain professions? most of these licenses are usually only issued on the basis of a post secondary education.

^ I'm hardly older than you at 22.

You do need a license to practice certain professions, and yes, you'll have to go to college for those. I didn't say that college is worthless or can't help you, just that if the only reason you're going is because you feel like you should, and not because you're actually motivated to study and get involved in a certain field, you're wasting an awful lot of time and money.

If you look at college as an opportunity to meet people in your field and not as a chore to get done, it'll help you. If you look at it as something you have to get out of the way in order to graduate into the "real world", your situation is not likely to improve much even after you're done with it.

Personally, I work in music--teaching and performing. I don't make an enormous amount of money yet, but I'm still pretty young and I'm getting by. And I'm out there teaching lessons, playing in clubs, shaking hands, putting up fliers, handing out business cards, and making the right connections to find the income that I need to support myself. And because I do this constantly, I'm getting better and gradually expanding my network of contacts all the time.

It's tough, but doable. My main point here is that, with or without a degree, you need to have a passion for what you're doing--and if you've got that, you'll be fine.

Both you dipshits are wrong. Its a combo of both.

You have to know some theory, school, and you have to be able to function in the realy world with that theory. You can exist at the lower levels with just an education or real world skills. But if you want to make it to the upper echelons of business, you have know how to talk to other suits, have to be able to discuss literature, politics, or history at the drop of a hat if need be. But you also need be get shit done.

Its a big club. And if you don't know the secret passwords, you aren't allowed in.
 

amelie

New member
Joined
May 23, 2009
Messages
110
MBTI Type
XNFJ
Where are the confident, intelligent, and still fun young people that value discussion, trying new things, and actually use their brain once and a while? Even my more intuitive and intelligent friends are susceptible to dumbing themselves down in social situations. I feel like shaking them! Wake up! Stop turning into mindless pop culture huffing zombies every time we go out!

Graduate school. No, seriously. But on the weekends, they do the same thing.

I'm an NF, but not a drinker, so I can relate. How about trying a sport type activity, or book clubs, or gaming groups? It will get significantly better as you get older. It sounds like you are too mature for your group of friends.
 

thisGuy

New member
Joined
Mar 14, 2009
Messages
1,187
MBTI Type
entp
^ I'm hardly older than you at 22.

You do need a license to practice certain professions, and yes, you'll have to go to college for those. I didn't say that college is worthless or can't help you, just that if the only reason you're going is because you feel like you should, and not because you're actually motivated to study and get involved in a certain field, you're wasting an awful lot of time and money.

If you look at college as an opportunity to meet people in your field and not as a chore to get done, it'll help you. If you look at it as something you have to get out of the way in order to graduate into the "real world", your situation is not likely to improve much even after you're done with it.

Personally, I work in music--teaching and performing. I don't make an enormous amount of money yet, but I'm still pretty young and I'm getting by. And I'm out there teaching lessons, playing in clubs, shaking hands, putting up fliers, handing out business cards, and making the right connections to find the income that I need to support myself. And because I do this constantly, I'm getting better and gradually expanding my network of contacts all the time.

It's tough, but doable. My main point here is that, with or without a degree, you need to have a passion for what you're doing--and if you've got that, you'll be fine.

your lucky to know what your passion is at 22...especially as an ENTP.

i move from shit to shit so much, my career will need to be a stable source of income AND have free time for personal endevours. i like what im doing now but whos to say my likings will be same 10 years from now.

so a fairly safe plan, to me, seems like to head to post-secondary and get something i can use as a base to jump off of
 

thisGuy

New member
Joined
Mar 14, 2009
Messages
1,187
MBTI Type
entp
Both you dipshits are wrong. Its a combo of both.

You have to know some theory, school, and you have to be able to function in the realy world with that theory. You can exist at the lower levels with just an education or real world skills. But if you want to make it to the upper echelons of business, you have know how to talk to other suits, have to be able to discuss literature, politics, or history at the drop of a hat if need be. But you also need be get shit done.

Its a big club. And if you don't know the secret passwords, you aren't allowed in.

no shit einstein...sun will still rise tommorow regardless of if i go to school or not...a bum gets by too, dont he...i think your talking bout something we like to call 'life'...it happens no matter what
 

simulatedworld

Freshman Member
Joined
Nov 7, 2008
Messages
5,552
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w6
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Both you dipshits are wrong. Its a combo of both.

You have to know some theory, school, and you have to be able to function in the realy world with that theory. You can exist at the lower levels with just an education or real world skills. But if you want to make it to the upper echelons of business, you have know how to talk to other suits, have to be able to discuss literature, politics, or history at the drop of a hat if need be. But you also need be get shit done.

Its a big club. And if you don't know the secret passwords, you aren't allowed in.


School is one method of learning such things/getting involved with a field. It's not a prerequisite for educating oneself or forging a successful career, though it can be helpful for that depending on what you want to do.

I meant only to stress that it's not an absolute necessity for every field, even though it is for some.

Bill Gates said, "Screw this, let's cut to the chase and start a business," dropped out of Harvard business school, and became the richest man on the planet.

Obviously this isn't typical by any means, but it does illustrate my point.

If you think I've somehow implied that school doesn't have value for anyone, you can't read.
 
Top