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[NT] Does Sex = Love for NTs

seeker22

New member
Joined
Apr 14, 2009
Messages
173
MBTI Type
XNTJ
I'm involved with an INTP who seems to be able to keep sex purely recreational - or at least, detached. I can't read her. When together, she is completely present and into the moment. When apart, she falls off the face of the earth. Question: is it easier for NTs to detach from the emotions involved in sex? As I said in a post elsewhere, for an ENFP sex + no contact for next few days = gasp!! Although, she does always return - on her terms...
 

professor goodstain

New member
Joined
Feb 14, 2009
Messages
1,785
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
7~7
Just the female INTPs. All other NTs are completely committed to the connection.
 

93JC

Active member
Joined
Dec 17, 2008
Messages
3,989
What does the time you spend apart have to do with sex?

EDIT: Looking back I really should qualify this. What I mean to say is you're wondering if she loves you or is in it for the sex, and the reason for this is the fact that when you're apart she doesn't talk to you? It just seems silly from my perspective: I fail to understand what the two have to do with each other. She could be madly in love with you and it would still be perfectly plausible for her to 'drop off the face of the Earth' once in a while.

At least that's my opinion, for what it's worth.
 
L

Lasting_Pain

Guest
Just the female INTPs. All other NTs are completely committed to the connection.

Actually I can see myself having sex with someone and not calling the next day. For reasons that are quite obvious if you are a full-bred INTP.
 

Wild horses

New member
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Oct 25, 2008
Messages
1,916
MBTI Type
ENFP
Who can pretend to know inside the blackened heart of an NT *sigh*
 

Domino

ENFJ In Chains
Joined
Nov 5, 2007
Messages
11,429
MBTI Type
eNFJ
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
You mean INTPs *aren't* giant fleshy sex toys?
 

A Schnitzel

WTF is this dude saying?
Joined
Jun 4, 2008
Messages
1,155
MBTI Type
INTP
Dude. I think the chick only wants you for sex and companionship.

You might as well end it right now.
 

93JC

Active member
Joined
Dec 17, 2008
Messages
3,989
Actually I can see myself having sex with someone and not calling the next day. For reasons that are quite obvious if you are a full-bred INTP.

Exactly. What if she's just busy and didn't have time to talk to you?
 

professor goodstain

New member
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Feb 14, 2009
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1,785
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ENFP
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7~7
Fine. All other NTs have the capacity to be completely connected to the commitment. Somehow. I suppose.
 

seeker22

New member
Joined
Apr 14, 2009
Messages
173
MBTI Type
XNTJ
you're wondering if she loves you or is in it for the sex, and the reason for this is the fact that when you're apart she doesn't talk to you? I fail to understand what the two have to do with each other. She could be madly in love with you and it would still be perfectly plausible for her to 'drop off the face of the Earth'

LOL... spoken like only a true INTP. I see your point - it's actually quite comforting.

For an ENFP like me though, usually, when you're truly INTO someone... you don't just meet up a couple times a week for sex and never talk or text or hang out in between! You don't limit contact and dole it out like a precious gem, one pellet at a time!
 

jenocyde

half mystic, half skeksis
Joined
Jan 2, 2009
Messages
6,387
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w8
Question: is it easier for NTs to detach from the emotions involved in sex?

For me, there are no emotions to detach from.

Sex and love are separate things. There are those who only have sex when in love - it's impossible to tell her way of viewing it. But even those who only have sex while in love, don't usually use sex to express that love. Because sex and love are separate things.
 
L

Lasting_Pain

Guest
Fine. All other NTs have the capacity to be completely connected to the commitment. Somehow. I suppose.

The nope I**P in general have a hard time calling people back after the first time they had sex.

The reason why is because having sex is the ultimate physical relation. It is beyond the touch,kiss,or cuddle. You have actually entered the persons body. You have to reflect on what has been done. Some people do not have to reflect on the matter. I do.
 

seeker22

New member
Joined
Apr 14, 2009
Messages
173
MBTI Type
XNTJ
Ohhhhh nooooo Costrin - am I? Tell me more... *sigh* , *pulls up seat* , *props chin on hand* , *listens* , Give it to me straight up. I can take it. =)

And lasting pain - YES - she is DEFINITELY the type that has to reflect - on almost EVERYTHING that happens... especially if its something big.
 

jenocyde

half mystic, half skeksis
Joined
Jan 2, 2009
Messages
6,387
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w8
LOL... spoken like only a true INTP. I see your point - it's actually quite comforting.

For an ENFP like me though, usually, when you're truly INTO someone... you don't just meet up a couple times a week for sex and never talk or text or hang out in between! You don't limit contact and dole it out like a precious gem, one pellet at a time!

I'm going to say something and I really hope it lands the right way... I don't mean to offend, I just want to be honest (from my own perspective): I wouldn't bother having sex with an NF unless I really really really like that person. Generally, it's too much work for me to keep them emotionally fulfilled.
 

Totenkindly

@.~*virinaĉo*~.@
Joined
Apr 19, 2007
Messages
50,145
MBTI Type
BELF
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594
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I'm not sure how to answer the question.

I'm capable of viewing sex as an experience in itself.
But I am simultaneously capable of viewing it as a huge huge huge connection with someone else.

I'm not sure how this leaves me feeling.

I think I could enjoy it during even if it's just recreational (although it means more if it's with someone I'm connected to), but afterwards I can't help but reflect on it and what it all "meant" even if at the time it wasn't reflective of much at all.
 
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