[INTP] Signs an INTP *Likes* You

[Aleph-One]

My aura of manly Te makes nerd girls scream like your mom at a Beatles concert.

 

[runvardh]

When an un-prompted "I love you" slips out, most often happening over IM.

 

[Salomé]

My aura of manly Te makes nerd girls scream like your mom at a Beatles concert.

Maybe you should bathe more than once a week.

Just sayin.

 

[Thursday]

When an un-prompted "I love you" slips out, most often happening over IM.

Yeah - my cousin does that
He has this profound sense of family thing
"You are going camping with us next year"

"Nope"

"Yes, you are. You want me to beat you up?; You're going"

"Nope"

 

[Salomé]

When an un-prompted "I love you" slips out, most often happening over IM.

Awww! That's a lot of finger slipping.

 

[runvardh]

Awww! That's a lot of finger slipping.

Well, it is an obvious sign, as long as other things show up in her behaviour.

 

[OrangeAppled]

When an un-prompted "I love you" slips out, most often happening over IM.

This is spot on with an INTP I knew...hahaha
It freaked me out, but it was less a true "I love you" than an "I think what you just said was really amazing". Once I realized that, it was cool.

 

[lowtech redneck]

Seeker22, you should heed bluemonday's advice. That is all.

 

[Verfremdungseffekt]

Today, on leaving my friend at the cafe, I got her nose.

She insisted I give it back because she'd need it. But I just walked away. It's mine now.

See, the thing is, at least the way I work -- and this seems to reflect other INTPs I know -- affection is paramount. Even in my closest relationships, it's just a question of degrees. Actual overt amorous attachment is so rare that I felt like I was going insane the one time I felt it. And I kind of behaved that way, frankly. Complete personality change.

I think the INTP modus operandi is to keep experimenting with affection, to try to carve out a sense of how he or she actually does feel. What's the shape of this relationship? What if I prod here? How about this? Is this good? Or what if I do this? No, that feels weird. It's like a cat, trying to figure out just the right place to sit.

Once the INTP has actually come to a conclusion, the declaration tends to be pretty straightforward. But there's no sense in rushing it; any uncertainty in the INTP's own mind, and... although if prompted it's likely he or she will go forward with things, out of deference and respect to the obvious affection at hand, which clearly means something, the INTP is going to be a profoundly ambivalent partner. Not knowing, not understanding will eat away at the INTP. And this isn't a field the INTP is good at.

INTPs tend not to screw around. If they're not forthcoming, it's because they don't know themselves. If they're putting off the problem, which is likely, perhaps a nudge or two might spur them into action (whatever their conclusion might be). Too many nudges, though, and you just push them away.

Unless you're confident in gently steering things, best just take any affection at face value. It is what it is, and for what it is it is true and important and precious, and means precisely itself. If anything more develops, you'll be the second to know. The INTP will probably be elated, and eager to share his or her new revelation. Eureka!

I figured it out! I love you! I mean, I really love you! Like, love-love. And here I'll explain in precise detail how this works. What do you think of that! Isn't it neat?!

 

[Domino]

"Gotchyernose" is known to remove not only an invisible nose but also women's panties.

 

[spirilis]

INTPs can be downright elusive creatures... What are the signs that an INTP likes you as *more than a friend*? So far, mine:
1) Throws "stones" at me - teases and banters mercilessly.
2) We seem to go into our own little world of conversation when together - to the exclusion of others who sit there and go what the h*ll are they talking about??!
3) Grins and makes fleeting eye contact before bashfully looking away...
4) Has majorly intense moments with me and then withdraws according to how extreme the intensity was - lol - I am beginning to think it's directly proportional.
5) Is EXTREMELY articulate, until she tries to talk about her feelings for me and then turns into a bumbling, muttering mess - usually followed by fleeing the scene.

So, thoughts?!

haha, pretty much.

My experience from ~3 weeks ago when I met this one girl (ISFJ, I think) 'till now-
1. Deliberately avoided eye contact for a short while 'till I felt comfortable sitting down at the table with my friends around me (and someone had started a conversation)
2. Teased her a little in this game we were playing by alternating between "helping" her and then subsequently "attacking" her in the game (to which my ENTJ buddy blurted out, "hah damn that's fucked up... it's like when guys hit girls they like"--coulda punched him right then and there LOL, asshole. I hadn't communicated my intent to her yet although anyone could tell I was interested by that point--like 30 minutes after I first met her )
3. When addressing her, had to deliberately come up with something to ask her about and when I talked to her, my attention was 100% focused on her (if anyone else interrupted me there I'd probably have ignored or nonverbally snapped at them)
4. Grins, fleeting eye contact, bashfully looking away--check. She was doing the same thing to me
5. Haven't actually talked about feelings with her yet, it's been all nonverbally communicated. Actually I'm gonna give her a note tonight (our 2nd date) that relays something about my feelings...
6. Majorly intense moments, then withdrawals? Check. "Withdrawal" usually means awkward silence though...
And add the most important one-
7. Sweating like a STUCK PIG

 

[Domino]

*stuffs dress shields into your shirt*

 

[jenocyde]

haha, pretty much.

My experience from ~3 weeks ago when I met this one girl (ISFJ, I think) 'till now-
1. Deliberately avoided eye contact for a short while 'till I felt comfortable sitting down at the table with my friends around me (and someone had started a conversation)
2. Teased her a little in this game we were playing by alternating between "helping" her and then subsequently "attacking" her in the game (to which my ENTJ buddy blurted out, "hah damn that's fucked up... it's like when guys hit girls they like"--coulda punched him right then and there LOL, asshole. I hadn't communicated my intent to her yet although anyone could tell I was interested by that point--like 30 minutes after I first met her )
3. When addressing her, had to deliberately come up with something to ask her about and when I talked to her, my attention was 100% focused on her (if anyone else interrupted me there I'd probably have ignored or nonverbally snapped at them)
4. Grins, fleeting eye contact, bashfully looking away--check. She was doing the same thing to me
5. Haven't actually talked about feelings with her yet, it's been all nonverbally communicated. Actually I'm gonna give her a note tonight (our 2nd date) that relays something about my feelings...
6. Majorly intense moments, then withdrawals? Check. "Withdrawal" usually means awkward silence though...
And add the most important one-
7. Sweating like a STUCK PIG

Awww, that's so sweet!!

Good luck and keep us posted.. (meaning: tell us what that letter says!!!)

 

[runvardh]

I figured it out! I love you! I mean, I really love you! Like, love-love. And here I'll explain in precise detail how this works. What do you think of that! Isn't it neat?!

This sounds familiar... *sigh*

 

[Salomé]

See, the thing is, at least the way I work -- and this seems to reflect other INTPs I know -- affection is paramount. Even in my closest relationships, it's just a question of degrees. Actual overt amorous attachment is so rare that I felt like I was going insane the one time I felt it. And I kind of behaved that way, frankly. Complete personality change.

I think the INTP modus operandi is to keep experimenting with affection, to try to carve out a sense of how he or she actually does feel. What's the shape of this relationship? What if I prod here? How about this? Is this good? Or what if I do this? No, that feels weird. It's like a cat, trying to figure out just the right place to sit.

Once the INTP has actually come to a conclusion, the declaration tends to be pretty straightforward. But there's no sense in rushing it; any uncertainty in the INTP's own mind, and... although if prompted it's likely he or she will go forward with things, out of deference and respect to the obvious affection at hand, which clearly means something, the INTP is going to be a profoundly ambivalent partner. Not knowing, not understanding will eat away at the INTP. And this isn't a field the INTP is good at.

INTPs tend not to screw around. If they're not forthcoming, it's because they don't know themselves. If they're putting off the problem, which is likely, perhaps a nudge or two might spur them into action (whatever their conclusion might be). Too many nudges, though, and you just push them away.

Unless you're confident in gently steering things, best just take any affection at face value. It is what it is, and for what it is it is true and important and precious, and means precisely itself. If anything more develops, you'll be the second to know. The INTP will probably be elated, and eager to share his or her new revelation. Eureka!

I figured it out! I love you! I mean, I really love you! Like, love-love. And here I'll explain in precise detail how this works. What do you think of that! Isn't it neat?!

Damn! Get out of my head already!

 

[Rachelinpa]

I figured it out! I love you! I mean, I really love you! Like, love-love. And here I'll explain in precise detail how this works. What do you think of that! Isn't it neat?!

Cuuuuuuuuute! Sigh.

 

[runvardh]

Cuuuuuuuuute! Sigh.

Exactly why they're worth chasing...

 

[Lady_X]

for real cute...awwwww.

 

[ThinkingAboutIt]

See, the thing is, at least the way I work -- and this seems to reflect other INTPs I know -- affection is paramount. Even in my closest relationships, it's just a question of degrees. Actual overt amorous attachment is so rare that I felt like I was going insane the one time I felt it. And I kind of behaved that way, frankly. Complete personality change.

I think the INTP modus operandi is to keep experimenting with affection, to try to carve out a sense of how he or she actually does feel. What's the shape of this relationship? What if I prod here? How about this? Is this good? Or what if I do this? No, that feels weird. It's like a cat, trying to figure out just the right place to sit.

Once the INTP has actually come to a conclusion, the declaration tends to be pretty straightforward. But there's no sense in rushing it; any uncertainty in the INTP's own mind, and... although if prompted it's likely he or she will go forward with things, out of deference and respect to the obvious affection at hand, which clearly means something, the INTP is going to be a profoundly ambivalent partner. Not knowing, not understanding will eat away at the INTP. And this isn't a field the INTP is good at.

INTPs tend not to screw around. If they're not forthcoming, it's because they don't know themselves. If they're putting off the problem, which is likely, perhaps a nudge or two might spur them into action (whatever their conclusion might be). Too many nudges, though, and you just push them away.

Unless you're confident in gently steering things, best just take any affection at face value. It is what it is, and for what it is it is true and important and precious, and means precisely itself. If anything more develops, you'll be the second to know. The INTP will probably be elated, and eager to share his or her new revelation. Eureka!

I figured it out! I love you! I mean, I really love you! Like, love-love. And here I'll explain in precise detail how this works. What do you think of that! Isn't it neat?!

I agree with that...and would add that it is sort of like mining. If I love someone, I will see it all, but I'm never looking for 'dirt', I'm always looking for and focusing on the 'gold'. And, God forbid should anyone else ever mention anything different - they'll be facing a verbally athletic bulldog with ice running through her veins!

 

[ring the bell]

Today, on leaving my friend at the cafe, I got her nose.

She insisted I give it back because she'd need it. But I just walked away. It's mine now.

See, the thing is, at least the way I work -- and this seems to reflect other INTPs I know -- affection is paramount. Even in my closest relationships, it's just a question of degrees. Actual overt amorous attachment is so rare that I felt like I was going insane the one time I felt it. And I kind of behaved that way, frankly. Complete personality change.

I think the INTP modus operandi is to keep experimenting with affection, to try to carve out a sense of how he or she actually does feel. What's the shape of this relationship? What if I prod here? How about this? Is this good? Or what if I do this? No, that feels weird. It's like a cat, trying to figure out just the right place to sit.

Once the INTP has actually come to a conclusion, the declaration tends to be pretty straightforward. But there's no sense in rushing it; any uncertainty in the INTP's own mind, and... although if prompted it's likely he or she will go forward with things, out of deference and respect to the obvious affection at hand, which clearly means something, the INTP is going to be a profoundly ambivalent partner. Not knowing, not understanding will eat away at the INTP. And this isn't a field the INTP is good at.

INTPs tend not to screw around. If they're not forthcoming, it's because they don't know themselves. If they're putting off the problem, which is likely, perhaps a nudge or two might spur them into action (whatever their conclusion might be). Too many nudges, though, and you just push them away.

Unless you're confident in gently steering things, best just take any affection at face value. It is what it is, and for what it is it is true and important and precious, and means precisely itself. If anything more develops, you'll be the second to know. The INTP will probably be elated, and eager to share his or her new revelation. Eureka!

I figured it out! I love you! I mean, I really love you! Like, love-love. And here I'll explain in precise detail how this works. What do you think of that! Isn't it neat?!

You put it all into words so precisely. I'm thinking you are my new favorite INTP!

Anyway, the way I liken it is that emotion and feelings are such a complex system to me, I really have to see all sides of it. It's about the same as if I decide to learn about the history of France or some other odd thing that randomly comes up. I will read all I can or watch documentaries until I feel satisfied I understand the intricate details of it all. At that point, I stop and I move on to the next thing. With love, on the other hand, I don't move on from the feeling, but I do move on to being comfortable with the next step. If you rush it, it will ruin it. I have to process through all sides of the situation before I broach it with the other person and it generally does come as a complete "Eureka!" moment.