[NT] Easter dinner with a table full of sensors

[Totenkindly]

There's got to be someone with a family like this. Do you go along with the talk and let it exhaust you, or ignore it and sit there? I can't take it anymore. Someday soon I'll be across the country and my parents won't be around.

Out of all my cousins, aunts, uncles, parents, grandparents, and siblings, there is only one other N and she lives in Chicago. (I live in Pennsylvania.)

Yeah, family gatherings were hell for some time. My cousins were nice and I could do things with them, but often it was very boring.

The funny thing is that when I became an adult and had to take on a lot more practical concerns of life (S-related matters), then those moments of connections became more important to me and I actually enjoyed them on some levels, for a limited amount of time at a shot. This is still far better than what used to happen, which is that I became drearily bored and just wanted and needed to get out.

Due to some family situations, I didn't see any of them yesterday. I'm still not sure if this was a good thing or a bad one.

 

[Moiety]

Yeah I eat sensors for dinner too.

 

[Journey]

I guess I grew up with a sensor family and am used to them and just being quiet and odd. I was 40 before my sister ESFJ told me that my brother ISTJ said to her on many occasions "Doesn't she have a way with words? She can size up a situation and put it in a few words exactly as it is." Now that my sister is dead I never hear compliments anymore. Woe be unto anyone in my family to say something nice to somebody to their face (except me.) They do have some interesting conversations, though. Not just sports and gossip. Actual discussions about events and such. So I am luckier than most. I do have an INTJ nephew, an ENTJ niece-in-law, an ENFP niece and an INTsomething niece (she hasn't decided yet.) So I am not totally without backup from the younger generation. I do tend to hang with my nieces, in fact the ENFP and INTsomething are coming (2 hour trip) this week to hang with their 52 year old aunt. They are in their mid thirties.

 

[Jeremy]

Wow, this post reeks of unwarranted self-importance. I mean, come on. Is it really that "Sensors" just don't get it? Or are you just too much stuck within yourself to just talk to people without having to go into deeper territory?

Iunno, I identify as an N, but I don't think it's necessarily the "sensors" that make your life hell at family gatherings and such. I think it's probably the fact that you're not allowing yourself to enjoy the company of others. People who consider themselves "Intuitive" in the MBTI tend to put anyone they consider "boring" or "socially minded" into the box of "SENSOR". To be honest, it's used around here like the worst insult that could be leveraged at someone. They're still people, even if they don't care about the same things you do. Try to enjoy it and get to know them beyond their surface personality - because really, that's all the MBTI shows us - the surface, not what's going on underneath the hood.

Then again, I'm from a small town, so I'm kind of used to most of the people I had around my house on Easter.. it's not as awkward. So I can understand that individual differences in situation can make or break family events.. but even so, don't use the MBTI as a way to stereotype an entire group of people just because you don't like interacting with them. It's not what the system was designed to do - understanding differences is supposed to HELP you get along with others, not further alienate yourself from anyone you perceive to be as different from yourself.

 

[entropie]

I just got back from the second easter dinner and I barely can walk, my stomache is about to blow

 

[Jeremy]

I just got back from the second easter dinner and I barely can walk, my stomache is about to blow

You got two of them? Lucky. I had to leave early from mine, because I had to be back at OSU by 6:45.. it stunk. Such is the life of an RA

 

[Quinlan]

I'm curious to know what kind of dinner conversations would be satisfying for an intuitive?

 

[CJ99]

I'm curious to know what kind of dinner conversations would be satisfying for an intuitive?

Anything philosophical! or with a philosophical base. Like politics (left or right), economics (does capitilism work?) and other stuff like that though those 2 examples are more NT than N.

 

[Moiety]

Anything philosophical! or with a philosophical base. Like politics (left or right), economics (does capitilism work?) and other stuff like that though those 2 examples are more NT than N.

I think they are more NF than NT but yeah. Science, for example, being clearly NT by comparison.

 

[Tallulah]

Anything philosophical! or with a philosophical base. Like politics (left or right), economics (does capitilism work?) and other stuff like that though those 2 examples are more NT than N.

Yeah, for me, politics is usually more of an NF thing--the whole caring about the global society thing. NTs are usually more cynical about politics and have the attitude that it does no good to debate stuff like that when a) people are so emotional about it, and b) no one's going to change their minds after a dinner-table discussion. Bring up politics, and my eyes glaze over immediately.

I like to discuss things like cultural trends and where they might have come from, and I like to discuss music and the arts. If you watch the same tv shows I do, I'm perfectly happy to discuss favorite eps or speculate what might happen for shows like 24 or Battlestar Galactica (when it was on). I don't need to have a philosophical discussion to find common ground with you. Really, people are interesting to me when our personalities click, so it's really more of a chemistry thing than the actual topic at hand.

 

[Quinlan]

Anything philosophical! or with a philosophical base. Like politics (left or right), economics (does capitilism work?) and other stuff like that though those 2 examples are more NT than N.

I can see how sensors might not want to take the effort to discuss such things, especially when they're busy eating/socialising. I suppose the level of disinterest from both sides would be similar, I'm sure both sides could carry out either kind of discussion, it just requires more effort to do so.

 

[sciski]

I'm curious to know what kind of dinner conversations would be satisfying for an intuitive?

'What if' and 'why was' instead of 'what is' or 'what was'.

I don't see why sensors wouldn't be interested in those things as well though (after all, I do like my share of what is/what was).

What I've discovered is that conversation with lots of Sensors gives you so many brilliant tips for navigating through this business we call life! Also, the practicality is extremely refreshing and calming. There are answers to things in the concrete world! And they make sense! Ahhhh!

 

[Quinlan]

'What if' and 'why was' instead of 'what is' or 'what was'.

Like "What if Jonah Lomu was still playing on the wing for the All Blacks" or "Why was that bitch in accounts being such a bitch?"

That sort of thing?

 

[sciski]

Like "What if Jonah Lomu was still playing on the wing for the All Blacks" or "Why was that bitch in accounts being such a bitch?"

That sort of thing?

Totally!

What if Jonah Lomu's pants fell down?
Why was I not around when Clive Owen was single??

 

[entropie]

I'm curious to know what kind of dinner conversations would be satisfying for an intuitive?

Watch the slight nuance of desperation and hopefully never witness all the relations drawn from here !

[YOUTUBE="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z4ShSf4Hn-0"]The Chief Roller[/YOUTUBE]

 

[Jeffster]

I AM SENS-OR. I DEVOUR YOUR FOOD WHILE DROOLING INANE BANTER ABOUT ACTUAL THINGS ALL OVER YOU. YOU CANNOT STOP ME. AHAHAHAHAHAAHA.

 

[run]

Its not the 'sensor' status that makes people boring. It's the fact that they're all unbalanced because they're surrounded by each other, and brought up by our S-bent educational system. And still, they're draining. What'd I do today? The same thing I did yesterday.

 

[sciski]

BTW, a good talking point is relationship ettiquette. It starts many debates as everyone has their opinion to put forward, and you'll find that other factors come into play, many of which override any S/N divide. For instance, the females will gang up to berate the males or vice versa, or the young will gang up to huff at the oldies, etc etc... it's all very juicy and a great way to get to know people better.

 

[Quinlan]

Hah, even with an S bias I still crapped out in school.

 

[Jeffster]

Its not the 'sensor' status that makes people boring. It's the fact that they're all unbalanced because they're surrounded by each other, and brought up by our S-bent educational system. And still, they're draining. What'd I do today? The same thing I did yesterday.

So, wait..you're saying they are more boring than that post is?