Hypothetically?
You're gonna be s o h r r y.
ENXJ has tertiary Se. For them to feel good and right they have to scan the environment they are in and freely and fully take action according to impulse. And for ENTJ, impulse is provided by Te/Ni together with some Fi background noise.
Is there anything Fe can meaningfully interject in such a circumstance? Seriously? Fe is eighth in function order for an ENTJ. It's literally the last thing they listen to.
Which doesn't mean they won't hear you. But it does mean your Fe program will find no particular satisfaction in ENTJ company, even if you do succeed in teaching him something about himself. You won't see it reflected back at you in the way you need most. In fact, you'll tend to see the opposite of what you need most. As will he.
But he's got the tertiary Se. Your Inferior Se will be overrun and ground into the dirt. It's not what he'll want to do. It's just what will happen.
as an ENTJ whose had a thing or two with INFJs, i completely disagree on Fe, but agree on Se
1. we dont listen to Fe in our normal everyday decision making, so if we had say an ESFJ mom, we'd clash our entire childhood and "hate Fe" like you say. If people were to use Fe in argument, we would also hate it.
However, later in life, say we meet ENFJ or INFJ, we see this function that we have NO IDEA how to use, and we begin to see how well it works to have a TEAM MEMBER use that Fe FOR US. We become attracted to that Fe warmth, not because we want to use it ourselves, but because its this foreign, missing function that poses no threat to us, because we dont desire to use it ourselves. Completely different than an ESFJ trying to force us to use Fe OURSELVES. Do you see the difference? the NFJs for lack of a better term: cover our ass when we are making Fe fools of ourselves, and provide that warmth that NTJs generally learn to live without.
2. I do agree with you on the Se factor. Not to say INFJs lack Se use...no no no, INFJs can get bad Se with the best of the ESFPs (partying, sex etc). the real bad thing about INFJ Se, is that they become disconnected with reality. Not in the sense that theres an argument and they wont listen...no more like: they simply wont see the life the same way you do. Any relation, circumstance, symbol, etc will be accurately rooted out and defined by the ENTJ, while the INFJ will basically cast it into some idealized INFJ world view... it allows them to either irrationally blame themselves, or irrationally ignore when the blame IS actaully on them.
3. I think the main problem with the INFJ ENTJ is that the ENTJ is going to end up "dominating". You'll both like that at first... but then the ENTJ gets tired of not getting any challenge back, and the INFJ just grows accustomed to the ENTJ doing everything.
4. ENTJs need more of an equal when it comes to "desire to dominate" and the INFJs need more of a fantasy land. This is why ENTP INFJ works so well: the ENTP is never really aware that they are even with the INFJ, so the INFJ can basically cast what ever fantasy land projection they want onto it. Also the INFJ is the ENTP supervisor, so for once in their lives THEY come out of their shells and TRY.
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