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[NT] NTJs and treating people like pawns

EcK

The Memes Justify the End
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I'm an entp,
'nough said!
 

Virtual ghost

Complex paradigm
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Fuck yeah, I knew it! I know exactly the kind of situation you're in... where you know you will sustain heavy losses if you try to save that person's base. IME, if that person got a drone/probe out, it's wiser to just have them rebuild if they were hit with a heavy rush.

How did you end up winning that one?

We should compose a group of starcraft players from this board.... but I'll be damned if we have any XNFPs on our team =) IMO, NTs and SJs usually make the best teamates.

They were 2 protoss and 2 zerg and we were 3 terrans and 1 protoss.
The thing is that they went to rush one terran. But they lost a fair amount of their army fighting his few marines and SCVs and with remaining troops they strated to destroy base infrastructure. But they were constantly sending reinforcements. I know that if we send our marines without medics and with that few zealots that the other guy had we will lose for sure. Plus their reinforcements will be coming from our back what will result with sandwich.
So instead we waited for medics and then I and protoss attacked their bases.
But combination medics+stimed marines+zealots can pawn everything they had at that stage because they placed everything they had in army and rush. But instead to destroy they entire base we were aimed only at nexuses and lairs and they didn't want to confront us with workers since what would be a suicide. So we destroyed only two structures but throw two of them out of the game. They could not attack us succesfully because we created a baricades at entrances. The other terran blocked the way to the protoss and himself since they share intrests and entrances. If they attacked they would suffer huge loses.
They probably expected that we will try to save him but instead our plan was somewhat counter intuitive and we hit where it hurts.
When it was 2vs3. the siege tanks come into play and ... (you know the drill)
They lost because they were not playing as a team and did not have plans.


This is a lot of self-flattery.

Antisocial One, surely you realize the inherent damage the purposeful reveal of such a position creates? Perhaps we are not your subjects.

In any case, I've found that those who wish to assert control over the peers are often those who feel the greatest emotional distance from them. The application of dominant will thusly functions as a confirmation of some internal suspicion of superiority.

Megalomania is a pop term used to describe latent inadequacy; a means to disavow lingering fear of failure or disruption of prized ability.

Mbah, only plan for other people when asked. I'm pretty good with train and bus schedules...otherwise I prefer to be free to do my own thing.

I don't know man, every new thread of yours seem blabbers on how awesome you are.


You two are right. There is some egocentricism in that post. I have opened his thread to see how other NTJ deal with this kind of thing.
There is a dogma that INTJ and ENTJ like to be incharge and plan things that others will do. So I have shown the most NTJ side of me to provide examples of stereotypical NTJ behavour from my life. That is why I have asked "can anyone relate?" few times. Some people took the thread it more light hearted way but topic is not a koke.

I am perfectly aware that admiting this kind of behaviour to others can be quite bad for relations. Over the years I have managed to act more kindly to people but I can still hurt peoples feeling without too much effort if I am not careful. But huthing their feeling is not my goal.
ENTJ probably stand better in this kinds of things then INTJ because of E.


On the other hand I am forced into this. Since people want me do the planning and thinking. (I made a thread about this few month back).
if something need to be keept safe people usualy give it to me since I am the most reliable person in the group. I must pay attention to my perents bills since they forget to pay them from time to time. Many times people reject my idea because they don't want to change something. Most of this are qute trivial things. But they are suprised and approve when they see how good it works. (since I did it behind their back)
The only way that I can do things is by indirect ways or behind their back. Both ways lead to treating people like pawns or with disrespect.
One year when I was a kid no one was interested in throwing a Christmas tree out. So it stayed in the living room until May.
I have more stories that are similar to this one.


I am reised myself in a way that I can live in my environmemt and still have some progress. I know that it is arrogant to think that you are better, but in many cases life didn't prove me otherwise.

Does this make any sense?
 
G

garbage

Guest
Eh....I can be a good strategist without treating people like objects, thanks.

Making good, efficient decisions and treating folks like people aren't mutually exclusive...

And if you don't treat people like people, they won't be too eager to follow your strategies anyway. I know of two other ENTJs in leadership positions here at work, and the one who has people skills has a much better time earning others' trust and conducting his plans than the one who just directs his subordinates.

I used to work for the humane one on a particular project, and he made me feel that we had more of a partnership. He treated me like a human being and genuinely appreciated my contributions. He now works for me on a different project, and I've been trying to follow his leadership example with him and everyone else under me.

The other one.. not so much. Those under his employ served him only to the degree that they had to until a better job opportunity came along, then they bolted.
 

GargoylesLegacy

Kickin' Ass since 1984
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Do I? Not usually. I prefer to keep to myself without the extra trouble of micro-managing others to do my bidding. I trust myself to do things more properly than others. Now, if someone gets in my way...
All jokes aside: Same with me. I always do stuff myself, no matter how much of a pain in my butt it is or how long it takes. That's just how life teached me.
But as you said, if somebody gets in my way, then horray. He is gonna be out faster than he will realize. :dry:
It's quite easy for me to do that. I have seen it a few times in the past already. But that stuff is really more for the emergencies and nothing else.
 

Virtual ghost

Complex paradigm
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And if you don't treat people like people, they won't be too eager to follow your strategies anyway. I know of two other ENTJs in leadership positions here at work, and the one who has people skills has a much better time earning others' trust and conducting his plans than the one who just directs his subordinates.

I used to work for the humane one on a particular project, and he made me feel that we had more of a partnership. He treated me like a human being and genuinely appreciated my contributions. He now works for me on a different project, and I've been trying to follow his leadership example with him and everyone else under me.

The other one.. not so much. Those under his employ served him only to the degree that they had to until a better job opportunity came along, then they bolted.

What I am trying to say in this thread among else is that just because you have people skills that does not mean that you don't think about them as pawn in you head when you are making plans.
People skills are just increasing your chance of success.



All jokes aside: Same with me. I always do stuff myself, no matter how much of a pain in my butt it is or how long it takes. That's just how life teached me.
But as you said, if somebody gets in my way, then horray. He is gonna be out faster than he will realize. :dry:
It's quite easy for me to do that. I have seen it a few times in the past already. But that stuff is really more for the emergencies and nothing else.

I am also like this but in my case life has thought me that sometime I have to influence others for the sake of both of us.
What I am trying to say is that I am not total control freak. I am too introverted for that but from time to time this needs to be
done.
 

LostInNerSpace

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The post is a little long for my attention span right at this moment. I'll come back and read it in more depth later.

If I tell you what I really think of the video it might upset some people. If anything I would want to dream up, design and test those weapons. Other people would be better suited to actually build them and work out the details.
 
G

garbage

Guest
What I am trying to say in this thread among else is that just because you have people skills that does not mean that you don't think about them as pawn in you head when you are making plans.
People skills are just increasing your chance of success.

Oh yeah, don't get me wrong.. I agree:

Sometimes, I feel that empathy, small talk, personal interest, and connection on an emotional level is but a tool to help me accomplish that goal. It works.

Most often I don't feel that I have to force empathy, small talk, and personal interest when I talk with them personally.. it just kind of comes naturally. But in my head, when I plan and organize people on the whole, I don't mind that I think about them as resources.
 

FDG

pathwise dependent
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What I am trying to say in this thread among else is that just because you have people skills that does not mean that you don't think about them as pawn in you head when you are making plans.

Believe me, if the other parties are perceptive, it shows. It shows when a person is being "social" and "kind" only because the person is useful. And it's not pretty.

Now, thinking about them as "resources" is different, of course, than thinking about them as "pawns". Somebody could even be proud of being a "resource", whereas being a pawn doesn't really have much positive potential, I'm afraid.
 

BlackCat

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So here's a question. Are you "treating people like pawns" in a love-style relationship? It seems like there may be issues in that department. I doubt you will find someone who is totally submissive to you, and you may have to lighten up. :tongue:
 

Virtual ghost

Complex paradigm
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Believe me, if the other parties are perceptive, it shows. It shows when a person is being "social" and "kind" only because the person is useful. And it's not pretty.

Now, thinking about them as "resources" is different, of course, than thinking about them as "pawns". Somebody could even be proud of being a "resource", whereas being a pawn doesn't really have much positive potential, I'm afraid.

1.I agree in general. But what I was thinking if you are more friendly there are better chances that the other person will just swallow entire thing.
But if you are not kind at all you will not get far.

2.Don't you think that you are rationalizing your approach too much?:devil:
 

Hendo Barbarosa

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You're smart enough to learn how to communicate with them on their wavelength. Then make them understand :)

ah yes, but is that a worthwhile enterprise?

at least, that's what I would ask. It's possible though, definitely.
 

Virtual ghost

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So here's a question. Are you "treating people like pawns" in a love-style relationship? It seems like there may be issues in that department. I doubt you will find someone who is totally submissive to you, and you may have to lighten up. :tongue:

Just for the record I never had any kind of romantic relationship and I have never been in love. Even if that would be quite normal for my age.

As a matter of fact I would prefer to have someone equal to me when it comes to this. (aka partner in crime)
 

GargoylesLegacy

Kickin' Ass since 1984
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I am also like this but in my case life has thought me that sometime I have to
influence others for the sake of both of us.
What I am tring to say I a not total control freak. I am too introverted for that but from time to time this needs to be done.
Yes, very true. I have seen that too already. Sometimes I had to influence others and it wasn't really something you could call "emergency"; meaning my life was not depending on it or so.
Some minutes after my last post I noticed anyways that I should have written "I use it in emergencies and for "the rest of the world" anyways. Whoever knows about the two-face-style of INTJs will know what I am talking about.
As for your example: let me just call it an "emergency" too.
 

Hendo Barbarosa

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GL, do you mean by "the rest of the world" like...just everyday life?
 

runvardh

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On the strategy subject in video games, I wish I could play more with people who wanted to do get some kind of plan out and work as a team. Makes the situation so much easier and people expect it less often.
 

runvardh

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do you play WOW at all?

I don't....for that exact reason.

I do, but I haven't been in a raid in over a year because I haven't found a group that was as together as the one I once raided with. I also avoid PvP because I'm sick of being pwned due to how scattered everyone gets.

Then again, I'm currently leveling characters again since I killed off what I had before.
 

GargoylesLegacy

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GL, do you mean by "the rest of the world" like...just everyday life?
Well, yes. Just whoever is not in my "clique" or better yet one of my friends is "the rest of the world", basically.
We are known for having two faces, one with the "rest of the world" and one with our friends. This is what I am talking about.
 

Valiant

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Not to be scary or anything... This is in my nature.
People always start out as pawns. When I start liking something about these individuals, and see them for who they are, I stop seeing them as chess pieces or tools. Most people on here are just pieces to me, but a few who have managed to reach my heart, like Kyuuei, CaptainChick, Bougal, Sanveane, LadyJaye, PinkPiranha, Entropie, Luminous, Beat and a few others; they have earned importance. I value them as individuals, whereas I do not have the emotional energy to place value upon the large gray masses.


I have my codes that I follow, and a sense of what is right and what is wrong. I do not ever consciously manipulate people that I care about, if it is not purely for fun or a matter of grave importance.
I do, however, often play people as cards in a game in real life. Most of the time they don't even notice anything. Hell, some people even think of me as a jolly, harmless fellow. Well, I am fairly harmless since I am ultimately benevolent.

Sure, I despise myself sometimes for this. I have emotions, I feel guilt as strong as any INFP, I cry when my loved ones cry, I feel their pain... But this is what I do. I am a catalyst, through which others grow and others (metaphorically) perish. This is what leadership is. Force multiplying, manipulation. It is not evil nor good in itself, what you/we make of it; that is what matters.
 

AOA

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This is the way I am, and love life for it.
 
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