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[INTP] INTPs and loneliness

lbloom

New member
Joined
Jun 15, 2007
Messages
83
MBTI Type
INTP
One intimate mental connection is wonderful. Beyond that, I enjoy exchanging ideas with a variety of people, but this interaction is often more intellectual than personal.

I'd make a happy hermit.

Without knowing more, I'd say that the OP sounds like projection. People have trouble identifying with detachment, and mistake the open-endedness for self doubt, insecurity, lack of self worth, and the like. They don't quite get how comfortable that open-endedness is, and how little of the self is invested in recognition, or a definite end result.

There is a certain predilection toward existential depression; this is not induced by a lack of people. Heck, most people make it worse.
 

Verfremdungseffekt

videodrones; questions
Joined
Apr 23, 2009
Messages
866
MBTI Type
INTp
Enneagram
5w4
I think it's a deeper, more lingering flavor of loneliness, that comes from a sense that there simply isn't anyone out there to connect with. It's like being the last person on Earth, every day, wherever you are.

Although more extraverted sorts may more easily become "lonely", it seems easily counteracted by feeding them people. For the INTP (judging both by myself and by several friends), that just makes the situation worse.

Ironically, I tend to feel least lonely when I'm alone, and can allow my mind to expand, like a balloon, to fill the space. That just leaves some superficial cavities unfilled, like having no one to throw one's arms around.

Anyway, one gets used to it. It all becomes a fact of existence, and one gets on with things.

The Internet helps immeasurably, I should note.
 

bluebell

New member
Joined
Apr 30, 2007
Messages
1,485
MBTI Type
INTP
I can be talking to people all day and still be lonely.

This. Although, that hasn't happened recently. Looking back, this is more about what's going on for me than anything else. *tries to wrestle words into something coherent* I'm finding my recent interactions with people have a very different flavour than they did a year or so ago, regardless of whether they're people I know or random shop assistants. I'm more open, so others are open. Or something. Being seen and accepted is an antidote to loneliness. Deep connections likewise (although very rare).

/somewhat garbled
 

Verfremdungseffekt

videodrones; questions
Joined
Apr 23, 2009
Messages
866
MBTI Type
INTp
Enneagram
5w4
Yes, there is that. I feel like it's been receding a bit as I've gotten older -- particularly the last year or so, since I've severed a horrible relationship and begun to reclaim myself a bit. It feels like people are far more liable to take me at face value now than they were even a few years ago -- which is probably a factor of me, and the way I present myself. Though I'm not quite sure what's different. At least, not so well that I can put my finger on it.
 

zago

New member
Joined
Jun 25, 2008
Messages
1,162
MBTI Type
INTP
INFP forum, regarding INTPs:



Are INTPs more prone to loneliness than other types? Why? What should INTPs do to feel less lonely?

To me boredom usually takes the place of loneliness. I don't really care if I have no friends, but it can be quite boring. The only other reason I care is cause it makes me look like an idiot. Otherwise I'm fine.
 

Verfremdungseffekt

videodrones; questions
Joined
Apr 23, 2009
Messages
866
MBTI Type
INTp
Enneagram
5w4
I don't know. I barely know boredom, as I've too many things overwhelming my mind at any moment. The only time I tend to feel particularly bored is when I'm with other people and thus unable to withdraw entirely and focus on anything in particular. Though I suppose, taken what I've said above, it does somewhat tie in with loneliness. Again, when I'm by myself I've the freedom not to be quite so bothered.
 

Orangey

Blah
Joined
Jun 26, 2008
Messages
6,354
MBTI Type
ESTP
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6w5
To me boredom usually takes the place of loneliness. I don't really care if I have no friends, but it can be quite boring. The only other reason I care is cause it makes me look like an idiot. Otherwise I'm fine.

QFT. Though I don't know about the idiot part. Do you mean that you don't like how it reflects on you when others are made aware of the fact that you have no friends? If so, then I also agree. Back during the period of my life where I had no friends at all, I used to hate my parents calling me and telling me that I should call a friend and go do something at such and such a place.
 

Oom

Your time is gonna come.
Joined
Mar 29, 2009
Messages
510
MBTI Type
IsfP
Enneagram
5w4
At my first thought I don't think I'd mind being alone. On the other hand, I like to be able to have someone to relate to and fall back on because I'm not completely confident in myself. Also, I feel motivated by the comfort factor of having a relationship of someone who can say things to make me feel better if I'm feeling down.

It's completely selfish of me.
 

iamathousandapples

New member
Joined
May 7, 2009
Messages
495
MBTI Type
ISTP
Enneagram
5w6
Not Loneliness, per se, just feeling lonely. I always have a tendency to do this around friends. I kind of feel that I'm disconnected from the world.
 

Azseroffs

New member
Joined
Feb 23, 2009
Messages
417
MBTI Type
ENTj
Enneagram
5w4
I just wish there was someone in the room with me who never spoke or anything.They just sat there so that just in case I actually decide to want human contact there is someone there. I think that would be perfect. :D

In all seriousness though, I get lonely all the time despite my need to be alone a lot of the time. It's annoying. I love to be around people, but it can be so exhausting.
 

nozflubber

DoubleplusUngoodNonperson
Joined
Mar 30, 2008
Messages
2,078
MBTI Type
Hype
Pretty interesting to note: one of the questions on the MMPI reads something like this: "I feel alone even when in a large group of people" True or False

I believe its one of the eccentricity (F) items.
 

LostInNerSpace

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Joined
Jan 25, 2008
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1,027
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I don't know who you are or what you want, but if you are not who I think you won't care if I tell you I am about to go public is a very big way.
 

Oom

Your time is gonna come.
Joined
Mar 29, 2009
Messages
510
MBTI Type
IsfP
Enneagram
5w4
Chunga whorka. Ugga thortu wanga crud!

Care to elaborate?

Anyways, not being alone isn't such a bad thing even for an introvert. I happen to be fairly borderline in all my functions I= 60% N=60% T=65% P=60%.
Those are estimates off of a percentile test.

I don't feel very lonely. Most of my friendships are slightly aquantance-ish. My friends don't know a lot about me but they accept me, and if they feel the need to know something about me I'm not afraid to tell them.

I suppose an INTPs loneliness is dependent on how introverted he/she is and how much they have developed their social skills to convey something worth while to people.
 

Blank

.
Joined
Mar 10, 2009
Messages
1,201
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w6
I'll admit that I think there's different levels of quantifying loneliness.

When I read the OP, I thought INTPs would be pretty lonely. Then again, my perception of lonely meant just feeling misunderstood, which in and of itself is not loneliness. This being said, I think that it's an open-ended question. I think an INTP is more likely to feel hopelessly lonely compared to certain other types; however, they aren't likely to go batshit insane if there weren't other people around.

Bah, I can't really describe what I really want to say in that last sentence.
 

entropie

Permabanned
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Apr 24, 2008
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entp
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Sometimes you are the wanker and sometimes you are the wavering ?! .)(. ß?\?ß
[YOUTUBE="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ShTm8MnUAjo"].[/YOUTUBE]
 

LostInNerSpace

New member
Joined
Jan 25, 2008
Messages
1,027
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INTP
however, they aren't likely to go batshit insane if there weren't other people around.

Ha, ha. This was only a "joke thread". You "over rationalized". Take a guess at what might drive someone batshit insane. I'm calm now, but if you push my buttons you will get music. I will try again not to come back here.
 

Aleph-One

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Joined
Apr 13, 2009
Messages
155
MBTI Type
INTJ
When the real LostInNerSpace comes back, we should remind him/her that every self-respecting INT knows the benefit of a strong password.
 
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