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[INTP] INTP Addiction

JocktheMotie

Habitual Fi LineStepper
Joined
Nov 20, 2008
Messages
8,491
Hm, no, I think that it does. I mean, I think that is what he means when he is speaking of trustworthiness. He mentioned being burned in the past, so I get the sense that he would like to trust me, but he does not want to be stabbed in the back until he is sure no harm will come from me.

Yeah, this is a bad habit of mine. I tend to project my personality on others a lot. From other responses in the thread it seems I am in the minority when it comes to withholding my personal feelings from others, even those I consider friends. It's very possible he may be more balanced than I. I tend to fall into the extremes.

But like others have said. Take it slower. Try not to overwhelm him. We need time alone to re-energize and analyze everything before we feel we understand the relationship enough for it to progress.
 

Tallulah

Emerging
Joined
Feb 19, 2008
Messages
6,009
MBTI Type
INTP
Yeah, this is a bad habit of mine. I tend to project my personality on others a lot. From other responses in the thread it seems I am in the minority when it comes to withholding my personal feelings from others, even those I consider friends. It's very possible he may be more balanced than I. I tend to fall into the extremes.

But like others have said. Take it slower. Try not to overwhelm him. We need time alone to re-energize and analyze everything before we feel we understand the relationship enough for it to progress.

I'm with you on that, though, Jock. The vast majority of my friends, and longterm ones at that, probably don't know many personal details. I've consciously worked on sharing more of myself with others, but it's still only to a select few. And the ones that I've ended up sharing with have been the ones that haven't forced me to share, or made me feel self-conscious. They've been the ones who've made me just feel unconditionally accepted (and those I know are loyal and not gossips). I don't like feeling pressure to open up, though--like when someone feels like they're not truly my friend unless I'm sharing deep, dark secrets.
 

Rachelinpa

New member
Joined
Aug 4, 2008
Messages
878
MBTI Type
ENFP
Yeah, this is a bad habit of mine. I tend to project my personality on others a lot. From other responses in the thread it seems I am in the minority when it comes to withholding my personal feelings from others, even those I consider friends. It's very possible he may be more balanced than I. I tend to fall into the extremes.

I can see what you mean, actually. The one other INTP I know (and scared away... ha!) once said to me that he thought I was way intense. I told him that surprised me because he seemed intense too. His explanation was similar to yours in that he pointed out his intensity was all internal and he did not really see the need to hash it out. I think my INTP roommate does have a bit of E. He is in sales, after all.

But like others have said. Take it slower. Try not to overwhelm him. We need time alone to re-energize and analyze everything before we feel we understand the relationship enough for it to progress.

Yep. Noted. I try to distract myself with other people, even though he is one of the ones I like the most. Funny thing is, I need space from him too. Guess I need to take the "Easy there, Killer" advice (from my ISTJ roommate) and give my prey a break.
 

MacGuffin

Permabanned
Joined
Apr 19, 2007
Messages
10,710
MBTI Type
xkcd
Enneagram
9w1
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I wonder, do INTPs like ENFPs as much as the other way around?
 

A Schnitzel

WTF is this dude saying?
Joined
Jun 4, 2008
Messages
1,155
MBTI Type
INTP
It seems like putting up a wall of protection until I am more sure would be better for me.

That's the thing.

I don't put up any walls. I usually attribute that to NJs. I'm usually stuck in Ti-Ne mode where I'm either analyzing something or joking around. This can produce some great and profound discussions without getting emotions involved.

I'm not naturally inclined to reveal emotional information. It also depends how deep seated it is. For example I'll reveal to my ENFP friend that I'm insecure about how I'm going to do in school, but not my past relationships.
 

Rachelinpa

New member
Joined
Aug 4, 2008
Messages
878
MBTI Type
ENFP
They've been the ones who've made me just feel unconditionally accepted (and those I know are loyal and not gossips). I don't like feeling pressure to open up, though--like when someone feels like they're not truly my friend unless I'm sharing deep, dark secrets

I really like that definition of friendship. It seems very restful. I think a lot of my interaction with INTPs come from not only needing to know (simple curiousity), but also needing to be liked... which is really just insecurity. I want so much to get over that and to be OK with not being liked. Any advice on that one?
 

JocktheMotie

Habitual Fi LineStepper
Joined
Nov 20, 2008
Messages
8,491
If anything, I find ENFPs attraction to us, very attractive. If that makes sense. Haven't had enough ENFJ interaction to have an actual opinion, though I find Js to be rigid in general which I do not like.
 

Tallulah

Emerging
Joined
Feb 19, 2008
Messages
6,009
MBTI Type
INTP
I really like that definition of friendship. It seems very restful. I think a lot of my interaction with INTPs come from not only needing to know (simple curiousity), but also needing to be liked... which is really just insecurity. I want so much to get over that and to be OK with not being liked. Any advice on that one?

Yeah, I think maybe the key is to realize that it's actually okay for people NOT to like you. And I mean, literally accept that in your head as the worst case scenario. Nobody's adored by every single person on the planet. The ironic thing is, when you don't care so much about acceptance, you tend to attract more acceptance. I guess because you're just coming from a more solid place within yourself. Just something I've found through experience.

Another thing to realize is that your INTP friend probably does like you a lot, and you just have to accept that his ways of showing it might not be the ways you're accustomed to. He might be a lot less effusive and move at a much slower pace. The more you try and accept his ways of operating, the more he'll try to accommodate yours.
 

Misty_Mountain_Rose

New member
Joined
Jul 21, 2008
Messages
1,123
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
4w5
I think ENFP are a little light for the INTP. They would probably be better for more serious, stodgy types like the INTJ or ISTJ.

Who you callin stodgy Mister! :azdaja:

Stodgy: adj - Dull, unimaginative and commonplace

None of these things describe me :violin:
 

Synarch

Once Was
Joined
Oct 14, 2008
Messages
8,445
MBTI Type
ENTP
Who you callin stodgy Mister! :azdaja:

Stodgy: adj - Dull, unimaginative and commonplace

None of these things describe me :violin:

I should have anticipated this... No, of course not. Misty Mountain Rose, you are the exception and are obviously a most compelling and enchanting lady INTJ! A credit to your kind!
 

Sarcasticus

Circus Maximus
Joined
May 3, 2008
Messages
1,037
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
5w4
I think ENFP are a little light for the INTP. They would probably be better for more serious, stodgy types like the INTJ or ISTJ.

I'm quite fond of all the NFs as friends or... more. I've had great romantic relationships with ENFJs, ENFPs, and INFJs, in particular.
 

Darjur

New member
Joined
Oct 26, 2008
Messages
493
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5
Sorry, but we don't tend to reveal too much about ourselves. I have doubts if the mass majority of my friends even know what food I like or even know whether or not I had a sibling.

About revealing something.
If I'm doing anything, and you come and disturb me, I will want to lodge my foot into your rectum.
If I'm bored, not doing anything that requires too much concentration or I'm just in a chatty mood, I'll speak about any ideas and give my opinion whatsoever.

If you want to know if he likes you or not. Give him two glasses of vodka, wine or something else and just plainly go and ask "what is your opinion about me?"


Jock, one question, what's SO?
 

JocktheMotie

Habitual Fi LineStepper
Joined
Nov 20, 2008
Messages
8,491
Significant Other. I find saying GF all the times feels like I'm bragging and talking about it too much, so I switch between them from time to time.
 
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