[NT] Hurt feelings and NT's

[A Schnitzel]

It probably comes down to how healthy they are. A psychologically unhealthy NT would indeed be very unable to cope with hurt feelings.. an alien idea. But by the same token, an unhealthy NF may totally overreact (by society standards) to hurt feelings.

I'd say that given healthy well balanced NT and NF, neither are more susceptible, they just view or react to it in typecast ways.

Yeah there's a neuroticism factor that MBTI doesn't account for.

 

[Kollin]

So I guess the conclusion of this thread is:

a) NT's deny to ever being hurt (possibly they're just repressing though).
b) T's and F's desperately need classes to understand each others humor.

A lot of T's humor uses a lot of sarcasm...hearing them banter, you would think they hated each other's guts but of course it's all in good fun...

 

[Totenkindly]

I think NTs are more sensitive to hurt feelings than NFs, yep, I do. Hurt feelings seem to have a muted, yet prolonged effect amongst NTs. We, NFs, accept and express our feelings,

blah blah blah

Bye bye! :hi:
Go play in another thread!
Have a good trip!

 

[BlahBlahNounBlah]

I think NTs are more sensitive to hurt feelings than NFs, yep, I do. ...

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha


Yeah ... uh ... NO.

 

[Haphazard]

CC, I think you need to define 'hurt' and 'feelings' for us.

 

[Sunshine]

I don't think NTs are more sensitive than NFs but some Ts are more sensitive than they let on.

 

[BlahBlahNounBlah]

Why do NFs keep trying to convince us that we're repressing our feelings?

It's like you guys are incapable of understanding that there are people who don't view the world the same way you do.

 

[Kasper]

Why do NFs keep trying to convince us that we're repressing our feelings?

It's like you guys are incapable of understanding that there are people who don't view the world the same way you do.

THANKYOU!

I don't share my feelings freely but I am aware of them and being hurt by anyone but a few I have vested my emotions just doesn't happen unless they physically kick me.

 

[BlahBlahNounBlah]

I just have to say though ... absolutely nothing is more adorable than an NF trying to cheer me up when she/he thinks she may have "hurt my feelings."

They assume I'm hurt because they would be hurt in the same situation, and I don't have the heart to tell them I don't actually give a shit. They're like puppies or something. That's why I love them so much.

 

[substitute]

Just people taking liberties, I guess. I usually don't mind and automatically put my feelings aside to get on with things and do the best job, task focused sorta thing. But when people just take for granted that I will always do that and deliberately take no account of what my feelings might be, y'know, they don't think that though I do this, I might not mind not HAVING to do it now and again! That pisses me off.

And when people question my honor or integrity. That deeply insults me, if it's done consciously, and irritates me even if I know it's not done on purpose.

Most minor things that people apologize for, it kinda irritates me that they do. Like they're saying I would consider it an option to get uptight or annoyed about it, like I'm some kind of asshole. I guess I kinda hope that people notice by my behaviour that I'm pretty forgiving and honorable, cos I work hard at being so, so if they're apologizing like that it's like they didn't notice, which makes me feel like my efforts to be a good person are for nothing. That's demoralizing, but not really hurtful in the sense F's tend to mean it... I don't feel personally attacked or anything and don't blame that person, I don't beat myself up or anything... just get a bit demoralized

I dunno... it's pretty difficult to HURT me in the way I seem to see F's being hurt, but plenty of things irritate me or get on my nerves, but it's not even real anger at those things, it's just ... I guess there is a lot of passion inside but it's in a protected area, not that I don't show or display it but I only do on my terms, so I guess cos it spends a lot of its time repressed (not being able to "get at" the real external causes of it), I tend to let it out in little spurts all the time over any silly thing that gives me the excuse to release a bit of built up steam, whether that be irritation, anger, happiness, amusement... so on the surface there's this false impression of perhaps volatility (growling at other drivers on the road, flipping the bird, hearty laughter, bursts of enthusiasm, emphatic expressions of approval/disgust etc), covering up for the real passion inside that's very much controlled, focused and disciplined.

 

[Sunshine]

THANKYOU!

I don't share my feelings freely but I am aware of them and being hurt by anyone but a few I have vested my emotions just doesn't happen unless they physically kick me.

Have you vested emotions in me?

 

[Totenkindly]

I just have to say though ... absolutely nothing is more adorable than an NF trying to cheer me up when she/he thinks she may have "hurt my feelings."

I don't know.

I love them dearly... but I start to get annoyed when this happens. It makes it hard to talk about anything when someone's so worried about hurting someone else's feelings, and I just want a STRAIGHT answer so I know exactly what we are dealing with.

I think I've come right out and said, "All right, tell me what you REALLY think... and don't hold back" ... and they still hold back! Waaaaaaa! <--mock NT tears

Have you vested emotions in me?

If you guys kiss, I'm outta here to go get my camera!

 

[Sunshine]

LOL! Jennifer you got me to laugh out loud.

 

[substitute]

I know what you mean Jennifer, I HATE it when people start making a big deal of apologizing and stuff... all that attention on my feelings, it's very uncomfortable for me... it means things are going to happen and I don't know what they might be, but I do know they're going to be based on my feelings, and since I go outta my way in life to NOT base things on my feelings, the idea of an entire situation grinding to a halt to be modified for the sake of my feelings is like... just the most embarrassing, cringe-making, horrible thing I can imagine. I'd be very unlikely to want to go near a place or person that I associated with such an experience for a long time after. Yeah, I guess it is actually even painful to even think about it.

If I register discontent at something, I don't want everyone rallying around and petting me and apologizing and talking about future strategies to take my feelings into account. I want the person I addressed to just say like, "Noted", and just get on with it.

 

[Sunshine]

I know what you mean Jennifer, I HATE it when people start making a big deal of apologizing and stuff... all that attention on my feelings, it's very uncomfortable for me... it means things are going to happen and I don't know what they might be, but I do know they're going to be based on my feelings, and since I go outta my way in life to NOT base things on my feelings, the idea of an entire situation grinding to a halt to be modified for the sake of my feelings is like... just the most embarrassing, cringe-making, horrible thing I can imagine. I'd be very unlikely to want to go near a place or person that I associated with such an experience for a long time after. Yeah, I guess it is actually even painful to even think about it.

If I register discontent at something, I don't want everyone rallying around and petting me and apologizing and talking about future strategies to take my feelings into account. I want the person I addressed to just say like, "Noted", and just get on with it.

"NOTED"?! Are you kidding me?!

How about "farted" ?

Yes that's much better. For future references everybody if you have something to apologize about to me you know what to say

 

[Totenkindly]

blah blah blah...

If I register discontent at something, I don't want everyone rallying around and petting me and apologizing and talking about future strategies to take my feelings into account. I want the person I addressed to just say like, "Noted", and just get on with it.

Noted.

LOL! Jennifer you got me to laugh out loud.

Okay, my work here today is don --

--- hey, wait a minute! *eyes Sunshine suspiciously* This isn't another one of your wily tricks, is it?

 

[Sniffles]

I know what you mean Jennifer, I HATE it when people start making a big deal of apologizing and stuff... all that attention on my feelings, it's very uncomfortable for me... it means things are going to happen and I don't know what they might be, but I do know they're going to be based on my feelings, and since I go outta my way in life to NOT base things on my feelings, the idea of an entire situation grinding to a halt to be modified for the sake of my feelings is like... just the most embarrassing, cringe-making, horrible thing I can imagine. I'd be very unlikely to want to go near a place or person that I associated with such an experience for a long time after. Yeah, I guess it is actually even painful to even think about it.

If I register discontent at something, I don't want everyone rallying around and petting me and apologizing and talking about future strategies to take my feelings into account. I want the person I addressed to just say like, "Noted", and just get on with it.

Noted for future references. And if I forget about that, well then I apologize.

 

[Sunshine]

Noted.























Okay, my work here today is don --

--- hey, wait a minute! *eyes Sunshine suspiciously* This isn't another one of your wily tricks, is it?

Lol no.

And I think I scared Trinity away. Lol.

 

[Sunshine]

Noted for future references. And if I forget about that, well then I apologize.

Hahaha

 

[Sniffles]

Why haven't you kissed Trinity yet?