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[INTJ] INTJ humor

Virtual ghost

Complex paradigm
Joined
Jun 6, 2008
Messages
19,769
This thread is not so personal it is just that I want more private atmosphere and it doesn't damadge the look of this forum from outside if it is here.
This thread could look like trolling since it is about something similar.


I am looking at the thread about how to freak people out and I just can't imagine (actually I can) that people find things like that odd or somewhat disturbing. So I have created this thread to show people how to freak people out.


Almost all the time I am just lost in my head ,thoughts and theoretical possibilities. But since no one can be 100% in any aspect. Because of that
I have extroverted feeling side just like everyone else

But this side is not actually fluffy and caring as it is normal for it.
Actually it fits like a glove on a hand with my dominant side.

My humor is generally apperciated but the thing is that I am very introverted so I always have the element of suprise, which is why I always leave the impression I want to leave.

And I always scan the place, atmosphere and peoples moods before I make a joke to make sure that every element is in place.

Here are some examples which I can remember that I said to other people


father: You would do that just to hurt me.
me : No I would not.
father : Yes you would and I know enought to tell.
me : You are so wrong.
father : Just admit it, you don't want me near yourself.
me: You are totally wrong, since in that case I would not be able to enjoy watching you go to work every morning.:devil:



Once two couples asked me to have lunch with them and I accepted.
But the place was crowded so we had to wait

Then after 45 minutes(I am sitting at the head of the table)

Girl1: I can't take much more of this I am hungry.
Guy1: Well it takes time to slaughter what you will eat.
Girl2: You are disgusting.
Guy2: Yes, and it takes time to cut it in small pieces.
Me: Bleh! Probably some amature did that slaughter so the level of blood in the kitchen is all the way to a knees. So they have to pump it out in the backyard before they can make us a meal. *continues to drink his ice tea*:coffee:

(on my language my comment sounds shorter)


NO!NO!No!No! You can't have sex with a dead woman like that. There is too much mass to be make it pleasant. So you need to cut some parts off.
Probably it would not be bad to put her in a freezer once you are done.
Just in case that you get horny again next week.:D



Once I had lunch with my familly and on TV there was an interview with the guy who is one of the largest vegetables producers in the country and the guy is huugge.

Somewhere in the half an interview guy says "Look, vegetables are my past ,my present and my future "

And then I said with smartass voice "And I bet that you own your appearance to the fact that you really like to eat vegetables":devil:

*female part of the familiy had to spit their soup back in the plates because of this.*:yes:



Or I can tell some politically incorrect jokes.
For an examle I like sexistic jokes but not because I am actually a sexist.
I use them usually when I know that there are women inside earshot.

Jokes like

Why women have so small feet?
So that they have easier time standing by a sink.


Or jokes that are antitolerant against general public.

Guy1: What are we going to do now?
Guy2: Nothing. We will just kill those poor people, all 50000 of them and one very sexy and hot blonde.
Guy1: Why blonde !?
Guy2: YOU SEE! No one will even ask for the poor people.




One more thing if mods will alow it. (if they allow any of this)
If you really want to shock someone, here is something you should show them.

The lyrics is in German but there are English subtitles if someone wants to know it.


[YOUTUBE="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XA22lTKJNn8"]Buch dich[/YOUTUBE]


Since I have posted this I would like to know if someone else does things like this and how they do this?
 

West

New member
Joined
Nov 19, 2008
Messages
17
MBTI Type
INTJ
I can't really remember any jokes off the top of my head, but suffice it to say, the general reaction to my 'humor' is: :steam:

My brand of humor is fairly morbid— couple that with severe introversion and we have a recipe for major misunderstandings. Either that or maybe I just don't hang out with the right people.
 

01011010

New member
Joined
Jun 22, 2008
Messages
3,916
MBTI Type
INxJ
People can rarely tell I'm joking. Maybe, that's the common denominator.
 

Typology

New member
Joined
Nov 21, 2008
Messages
167
MBTI Type
epyT
Enneagram
...
I love INTJ humor. I love the way it goes over everybodies head but mine, save a few people.

The most recent one I can think of: The riddle was, How many animals of each gender did Moses take aboard the ark? The INTJ answer: Neither because Moses didn't exist!
 

Edgar

Nerd King Usurper
Joined
Oct 25, 2008
Messages
4,266
MBTI Type
INTJ
Instinctual Variant
sx

Just follow me around the board, and you'll be all set... unless you are at a People with Disabilities fundraiser, or Orphanage X-mas party, etc.
 

Edgar

Nerd King Usurper
Joined
Oct 25, 2008
Messages
4,266
MBTI Type
INTJ
Instinctual Variant
sx
Yes!! They always steal my jokes :angry:

The thing I've noticed with INTPs, they always have a million ideas in their head, but they are extremely lazy when it comes to implementation (i.e. I saw a guy tell a joke and people laughed, I think I'll do the exact same thing)
 

EcK

The Memes Justify the End
Joined
Nov 21, 2008
Messages
7,708
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
738
The thing I've noticed with INTPs, they always have a million ideas in their head, but they are extremely lazy when it comes to implementation (i.e. I saw a guy tell a joke and people laughed, I think I'll do the exact same thing)

Well if other entps are like me in these matters it's simple; we always come up with our own jokes, and even if we heard a good joke from someone else, we'd just forget it ANYWAY.
And we can usually come up with new jokes on the fly so it's alright
 

Kasper

Diabolical
Joined
May 30, 2008
Messages
11,590
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
The thing I've noticed with INTPs, they always have a million ideas in their head, but they are extremely lazy when it comes to implementation (i.e. I saw a guy tell a joke and people laughed, I think I'll do the exact same thing)

Energy conservation.
 
Joined
Sep 18, 2008
Messages
1,941
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
512
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
We have humor?

Funny. I didn't notice.

I agree. I don't usually tell jokes.

When I'm comfortable enough to observe-out-loud, people think that I'm hysterical. But I'm usually being completely serious. :huh:
 

Amargith

Hotel California
Joined
Nov 5, 2008
Messages
14,717
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4dw
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Love INTJ humor myself, so dry and sarcastic, most of the time. The interaction between Edgar and 01011010 is a great example. The jokes I personally tend to enjoy less are the ones you make about sensitive topics.
 

Virtual ghost

Complex paradigm
Joined
Jun 6, 2008
Messages
19,769
Love INTJ humor myself, so dry and sarcastic, most of the time. The interaction between Edgar and 01011010 is a great example. The jokes I personally tend to enjoy less are the ones you make about sensitive topics.

Which are?
 

Misty_Mountain_Rose

New member
Joined
Jul 21, 2008
Messages
1,123
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
4w5
Most of my jokes don't register with the majority of the crowd. There is usually at least one though that gets it and knows that they are on the inside and love it. I just smile at them and go about my business.
 

Amargith

Hotel California
Joined
Nov 5, 2008
Messages
14,717
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4dw
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Which are?

The kind of topics that are considered sensitive in society, as I know others will take it badly when they hear the joke. For me personally, jokes about hurting animals. It's my weakness. Don't get me wrong, I won't stiffle your style, nor will I judge you, as I believe very much in tolerance towards others and freedom of speech. I'll just not laugh :)
 

Samurai Drifter

New member
Joined
May 8, 2007
Messages
116
MBTI Type
INTP
I find the humor I enjoy is quite similar to that of my INTJ brother, except that I normally wait for an opportune time.

For example, my friend and I were at dinner the other night, and he commented on the quality of the rice.

Me: Have you ever had Ethiopian food?
Friend: No.
Me: Neither have they.
 
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