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  1. #21
    Join Date
    Oct 2008


    Quote Originally Posted by animenagai View Post
    yes, i'm in that camp. i find myself getting upset over the smallest things people say. the thing is that a lot of the time i know that it is either a misunderstanding or that i'm right. but even then i feel i little cramp in my chest when really i should just be able to brush it off. no matter how much i rationalize and try and talk myself out of it, there's still that knee-jerk reaction. wtf do i do? do i just have to live with it?
    Just work on it, since you admit it is bothering you. Don't ask me how, I know I somehow did and nothing can really upset me anymore, at all.

  2. #22
    Senior Member animenagai's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008


    Quote Originally Posted by Dom View Post
    Hey there!

    So then, how old are you?

    You see I'm an ENFP, probably the one XAnder mentioned. I used to get very very very anry very easily over all kinds of things, I remember giving my primary school head teacher a problem as he had to discipline me for beat another boys head agaisnt a wall (I was about 9 years old). You see I was doign it becasue he refered to black people as 'niggers' I knew it was racist and wrong and ignorant. I told him to stop he wouldnt', told me IO didn't know wha tI was talkign abotu because there was no blacks ilviing in our vilalge (he'd moved there from a large city) So I did what my 8 year old brain told me would obviously solve the problem.. lol

    Excesive empathy is a problem for us ENFP (I'm white lol) but thisis exactly what I recognise you describing. You react when people hit certain buttons, either hard enough or often enough. I'm sorry to say that the truth is they probably find your reactions entertaining, I know people did/do mine. SO they like to wind you up and watch you blast off. It is annoying. You say you try to brush it off especially when it's someone you know is actually afriend, but it's hard at times and sometimes you don't understand why you have to put upo with people being mean all the time. I don't either, I do know that 30 years into this world and those peopel are still doing it. They think it's funny, they find the reactions, if/when they get them ammusing, it annoys and hurts us really. It took a new spouse, from outside the country, to coem in and observe before I could accept that I wasn't merely beign silly an dunable to brush off what I thought was just a little fun teasing. She observed that everyone who has known me longer than a few months, teases me unmercilessly, even my lognest servign friends, and she watched and noticed hwo I honestly didnt' find it funny, she has no idea why I allow it or why my oldest friends still do it!! (I don't either on that point)

    I'm not sure I have much help for you, but I do know that new peopel you meet wont try it deliberately if you dont' explode like you really want to the first time. The old ones, that know you can get wound up, they will do it forever it seems to me....
    that is EXACTLY how i feel. i used to get teased a lot too, but that was back when i was shy. i'm glad that someone fully understands. i'm 20 btw.

    thanks all of you. makes me feel better about myself.

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