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  1. #11
    Non-Oblivion Lady Lazarus's Avatar
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    No.

    「」

  2. #12
    Obliviously Mad Ashtart's Avatar
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    No, I don't.
    "If the truth shall kill them, let them die"
    468: The Truth Teller [4w5 - 6w5 - 8w7].

  3. #13
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    I tend to lose my patience really quick.

    When there's conflict that doesn't involve me/involves me indirectly, I avoid it. Just stay quiet or go away. When the conflict involves me, I try, first, to give some ideas to solve the problem, if the person/s in question don't back down, I may add a snarky comment. If that doesn't work (which never does), I may try to find allies and find a bigger way to solve the problem (like explaining the problem to someone with more power, always making a sad dog's face). If there are no allies, I'll grab the person who has the problem, sith them on a chair and knock them off the pedestal and work out a solution.

    Now, when there's someone insulting/offending me, I set things straight from the beginning: you're not respectful with me, I'm not going to be that way with you. I won't let you talk and make sure you don't ant to keep talking afterwards.

    Best example is from a month ago, when this hysterical girl entered the classroom I was in to curse at me because I had never been to a subject (where attendance didn't count) and I had the best grade because the portfolio of the class I presented was really good. According to her I had paid the professors and made other people do my drawings and such. She was mental. I turned back and said: "look, I spent 2 years learning to draw, I practiced everyday, made people who know how to draw correct me until I got good. Even if I was a genius and I hadn't needed any practice, you could have compensated that by sitting your ass on a chair and doing what you had to do; you could have reached for help; idea that never occured to you, because you preferred to come here to humilliate yourself in front of a group of people. Now, as you can see, I'm in another class, professors are correcting our works. If you're done with your hysterical speech, you can leave. The door is behind you." Then I turned back and continued doing my stuff. The girl gave me a death stare and went away.

    I try to be pacific and find the most neutral way to solve problems, but if someone insults me, my friends or my opinions, I'm speaking up.
    Likes There, xenaprincess liked this post

  4. #14
    ⋆✦⋆ Hiraeth's Avatar
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    I am Fi-dominant and have 9w1 in my tritype. I've always felt averse towards any conflict, but this is mainly with people I am not close with. It just feels so unsettling and unnatural for me to engage in any sort of argumental exchange, especially publicly. Although among family members I will stand my ground, but I'd still rather keep the peace when possible. On the otherhand, strangers, aquaintances, and even friends are a huge no-no for me unless it's really something that needs to be done. I think this has been more of an issue when I was growing up from being too shy and passive, thus getting walked on as a result, although I'm still not very assertive today either. I admire assertive qualities in other people though. I suppose I see these traits as something to sort of aspire to, since to me they embody strength and durability.

    However, I accept that I am naturally not an assertive and outspoken person in general and it's okay to not be if it gives you discomfort, but I think it's something that can always be worked on if it does indeed cause issues in your life. For me though, I'll just stick to lying low from the sidelines when I can.
    Hobo Chang Ba ~
    Likes Lord Lavender liked this post

  5. #15
    Sober revelations Hummingbird Spirit's Avatar
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    I struggle with it. I used to way more than I do now. Now I sort of feel conflict to a degree is necessary if you're really going to have a value. You don't have to be a jerk about it. and certainly, being a doormat isn't fun.
    These were the lovely bones that had grown around my absence:
    the connections—sometimes tenuous, sometimes made at great cost, but often magnificent—that happened after I was gone.
    And I began to see things in a way that let me hold the world without me in it.
    The events my death brought were merely the bones of a body that would become whole at some unpredictable time in the future.
    The price of what I came to see as this miraculous body had been my life.
    Likes There, Lord Lavender liked this post

  6. #16
    abcdenfp Abcdenfp's Avatar
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    I generally dislike conflict, my preference is for harmony in my relationships and I generally feel uneasy if I know that I am in. Conflict with someone I care about and continue to look for a resolution until I get to the point where I'm like fuck it, but if I feel attacked or challenged on something I feel passionate about I have no problem standing my ground.
    Likes Lord Lavender liked this post

  7. #17
    - Population: 1's Avatar
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    I don't thrive on conflict yet unfortunately life is filled with stupid, primitive, and aggressive humans so if you don't confront assholes when necessary they will march over your corpse. I've lived over four decades so I've had to learn to become a SOB at times to avoid a constant procession of dipshits figuratively trying to fuck me. Pick your battles, learn when to fight but don't be a doormat.

    I've been sick for the better part of more than a month and it's wearing on me so my comment is definitely reflecting that. I apologize for the extra edge.
    Likes Abcdenfp, Lord Lavender liked this post

  8. #18
    Birds vs Worms Obfuscate's Avatar
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    i hate it until i feel the need to do it... when i do stand up for myself i feel energized, competent, focused, intelligent, articulate, and justified... afterwords that can change if my admonishment was recieved well... in that case i can feel cruel, because i have a way of cutting people down with accurate observations of their misdoings and flaws... my language becomes harsh as i pinpoint the chinks in their emotional armor, in order to achieve maximized impact... on the other hand, if they are resolute in their position my resolve and feeling that i have taken appropriate action is strengthened... fuck them for their denial of my logic and self worth... fuck them for refusing to see what is plain as day... at that point i am likely to sever contact and/or become vindictive...

    post script:

    i am patient to a fault... i think that is why when i am no longer patient, the shift comes on so quickly, and i let loose all at once... i think there is only one person that hasn't shriveled in front of my barrage...
    “The only intelligent tactical response to life’s horror is to laugh defiantly at it.”
    ― søren kierkegaard

    “Most men are not wicked... They are sleep-walkers, not evil evildoers.”
    ―franz kafka

    “We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.”
    ― kurt vonnegut
    Likes Abcdenfp, Lord Lavender liked this post

  9. #19
    Liberator Coriolis's Avatar
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    I don't feel weird, no. I feel exposed and at risk if I haven't done my homework and have entered the conflict unprepared, but it can actually feel a bit energizing, in the sense of: things are moving. I might be able to make some progress finally. Too often an absence of conflict indicates avoidance of some sort of problem, a problem which usually doesn't improve with age and neglect.
    I've been called a criminal, a terrorist, and a threat to the known universe. But everything you were told is a lie. The truth is, they've taken our freedom, our home, and our future. The time has come for all humanity to take a stand...
    Likes Ghost, Lord Lavender liked this post

  10. #20
    Permabanned
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    I absolutely hate conflict and will do almost anything to avoid it.. I think this is more true with people who I am close to. As far as standing up for myself, I have learned to do that well over the years. I hope you can do the same..
    Likes Floki, Lord Lavender liked this post

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