[MBTI General] ENFP Anti Weakness

[runvardh]

I guess I have issues with women who hold me back and slow me down. I'm looking for someone who will walk beside me, not behind me.

 

[hermeticdancer]

The real problem Im detecting is that the OP is fearful that she'll always be turned on by emotionally unavailable assholes who ignore her, or criticize her, and don't really care.

Fear by most young women!

But seriously,,,Its not usually whinny-hysterical-submissive guy or total dick-asshole, you can get some stable guy who is strong, listens, and has some empathy. I know they are out there.

give yourself a break, you are emotional person, just accept it, you're OK my ENFP friend.

 

[hermeticdancer]

If a guy acts more girly and flitty than I do, it's a bigger turn off than almost anything save lack-of-hygiene.

Thats because ENFP females are one of the most stereotypical female types.

Maybe we feel like were competing with them for attention too, and we want the attention on us, and have to act like the strong supportive role a lot feels kinda weird that way for us, because its not who we are, were not like TJ's. We want to be crazy and silly and just talk all the time and be adored, for what we say. I guess someone to listen to all the crazy things that come out of our heads, and you have to be pretty calm COOL and stable to handle that. Not a drama queen yourself.

Nice guys are different from queens though, most men arent like that, espically NF's... ENFP and INFP guys are usually pretty tough.

 

[hermeticdancer]

I guess I have issues with women who hold me back and slow me down. I'm looking for someone who will walk beside me, not behind me.

KITTY!

 

[BlueScreen]

Ok, I'm not sure what I'm asking here, so you can answer how you want.

Basically, I've noticed that I (female ENFP) get annoyed with guys (not so much girls) that are weak. Like, it almost embarasses me on their behalf. You know, I want them to be sensitive, but I don't want them to be too sensitive. I want them to be able to take care of themselves and not get all dependent and gushy at me.

I think it is "weakness" that bugs me, but I'm not sure.

For example, my guy friend (ISFP) calls me from the road on his way to visit me this weekend. It's like a 3 hour trip and he's been to my house before, but for whatever reason he got lost. He (almost fearfully) says to me, "Don't you have a map or something? I think you're going to need to mapquest this for me."

Now, I can't place my own emotion, but for some reason this rubs me the wrong way. I'm not annoyed that he's asking for help (because ordinarily I love helping people), but kind of! I'm annoyed, but I can't figure out why. It's a perfectly reasonable request, but I feel like, ok dude, what do you really want me to do here? Figure it out yourself. Don't be such a baby. Ugh.

Thoughts?

I think it depends on type of weakness for me as ENFP guy. I have the same thing with friends. I don't like guys being weak, or superficially strong. But when I say weak I mean running scared and lacking substance and integrity, not being quiet or uncertain. I think a lot of people I class as weak other types think are strong maybe. It's weird if they have good intent I couldn't give a shit if they are a little messed up, not ready to talk. I'm guessing as an ENFP when you say weak you mean at a core level? Just I always talk about things at that level, so assume it's an ENFP thing.