[INFP] INFP and ISTJ Relationship Issue

[Starrynight5]

Sooo, my ISTJ hubs and I have had a somewhat rocky, but long and steady pairing. I would say our relationship is not built on rock nor sand, but on gravel. Here's my issue, which I could use some advice about.
He just made an account on FB a week ago and accepted a friend request from his ex (his first love from his teen years). I had asked him not to since she is a bit nosey for my tastes and 20 years later still tries to keep in touch with his family and asks about him a lot. I am not a jealous type, but I used to feel threatened by her (after we got together he was still in love with her probably--my intuition told me). I am finding that I feel a bit betrayed but can't quite explain it to him. Thoughts?

 

[KitchenFly]

Life before FB

 

[KitchenFly]

What is love bonding in identification for a man bonding to establish loyal relations for a women?

ISTJ's are funny creatures they can have lots of different motives due to may things like the influence of there Instinctual types drives and primals structure.

I generally find that there are two sides to the ISTJ coin there ether honest or sneaky and if you are a INFP then your clear mind will inform you of your partners agenda.

If you are entertaining fear based imagined possibilities as being real then you may have problems generated by your emotional based decision making.

ISTJ's are ISTJ's and there mind set or mind sets need that they need to generate the large power that comes from confidence and belief in self and ability to seaport and provide so the the SJ and T function will reason that open honest communication is a Heath generating action a healthy activity.

Trust is an important action for the ISTJ, it requires a lot of trust to face the would and to be conches within it and to remain conches in responding and reacting responsibly to life's structures and human demands.

I know as an INFP one finger stands tall toward embracing that set of responsibility so I may neglect to recognise the importance of a loved one who being an ISTJ's phycological connective needs with those the ISTJ celebrates a forum of plutonic (Union) with.

And we'll if he is having a relation ship on the side then perhaps be grateful for it will give you more time for quality TV viewing in the evenings.

Best of luck with your detective work.

Yours Faithfully,

Mark Anthony.

 

[IZthe411]

Sounds like your best bet is to explain how it makes you feel, and see if you can get an idea why he connected with her.

She might be the person who fills the 'first love' slot in his life and she gets an add based on that alone. He may have no intent or desire to connect with her a deeper level.
Or some other reason that can come out of a Si-Fi mind.

Find out before you let your own mind run wild.