[INFJ] Really Unhealthy INFJs

[BlakeUndefined]

How would unhealthy INFJs behave? Would they close off their empathy, hurt others verbally and create personas that would be used to manipulate them?


I personally seem to be down below in that hole of mine and i seem to be using my head a lot more. Too much such that I've realised that I have no empathy, no sympathy and basically, a lack of emotion towards everything.
Been mistyped continuously, from INFJ to INTJ, to ISTP, to ESTP, to ENTP then back to INFJ and INTJ.
Enneagram hasn't changed much, 5w4. Feels right.
Its funny how a theory I created was that the 'INTJ' part of me is nothing more than a persona made up for self defence etc.
But just../ I'm so lost.

 

[Mustafa]

Noone has empathy. Buddhism says that when you experience emptiness, then compassion arises. And they way I understand compassion contra empathy is that compassion is attraction with a system. Like when you follow a law and do go things when you can. You dont always have to do good things. But as much as you can. And there is the law of attraction, a theory, it is also known as the law of love.

There is no such thing as positive and negative when it comes to spiritual love. It is infinite and endless. And doesnt have a cause. It just is. So when INFJs pleasing you they are not healthy, they are just themselves. And when they dont please you, they are also themselves. And they should not not please you, becaues they "avoid conflict".

Peace

 

[pizzathegreat]

Just looking at what you've mistyped as: INFJ, INTJ, ISTP, ESTP, ENTP
You mainly seem to be drawn to Ti - Ni - Fe - Se

Based on that, you can probably focus on what INFJs look like in a loop. They'll primarily use their Ni and Ti, bypassing Fe and suppressing it. The things you listed are very often attributed to unhealthy Fe. This can make them look like INTJs in a way, possibly with a bit more skill in manipulation.

 

[Forever_Jung]

I don't mean to to duck your question, but how old are you? If you're pretty young, you're probably only looking for the first function and a hint of the aux.

If you're trying to type yourself as an unhealthy INFJ, you would be behaving like an exaggerated and crude caricature of an ESTP. Chances are though, if you don't fit the label so much that you have to perform those kinds of mental contortions, you're not that type.

 

[Ribonuke]

Unhealthy INFJs are often the result of closing out their Fe function. They lose their ability to connect with others around them, detach themselves, and then start looping about how pointless reality is and chase their own thoughts and conclusions in circles, because don't use their Se/Fe to generate new concrete data/opinions from other people to give finality to their conclusions.

If they get even unhealthier, to the point of shutting out their Dominant Ni because they no longer see any point in using it, they start to immerse themselves in distractions (Se).

SOURCE: Recovering from a six-year-long bout of Sertraline-induced INFJ-ism. And my mother is an INFJ if there ever was one.

 

[Forever]

I was stressed for a while. Unhealthy INFJ's are more of arrogant in what they know, staunch that they the best at everything, really obnoxious. If they're stressed, they get extrovertedly rude would be appropriate.

Idk I'm trying to imagine times at my worst so they'd probably speak their mind and not hold back.

Although master manipulators to get what they want seems right. And very pleasure seeking, with skewed in the moment thinking and get very clumsy like a drunkard.

I don't think INFJ's can really close their empathy, they'd probably get upset at the person for feeling negative. They would probably lack sympathy.

 

[INTJ123]

they'll tell you the wrong date for their dad's funeral and get mad you didn't show up.

 

[Ribonuke]

they'll tell you the wrong date for their dad's funeral and get mad you didn't show up.

Sounds like Demonic Si if I ever heard it; never knowingly ran into an INFJ that's THAT crazy, yet my s.o.'s mother does the same thing...and yet she's an xSFJ. Then again, let's just say she's taking pills that shouldn't be mixed...

On another note, I think, unfortunately, a lot of INFJs FEEL like they're unhealthy because they live in a world of concrete/scientific that doesn't necessarily reward them for the mystical methods they employ for understanding the world (ENFJs tend to have an easier time because they don't LIVE in their Ni, but rather their Fe, which ultimately rewards them more in the long-run). And because they FEEL unhealthy, it's like they tear down some wall of denial and then start ACTING even more unhealthy. My mother is an INFJ who, when she is unhealthy, walls herself off in her room and plays Plants vs Zombies. And then when I come in to see her, while she doesn't reject my presence, she starts flatly/depressedly telling me about how she can't get any peace or be left alone long enough to get anything done.

 

[INTJ123]

Sounds like Demonic Si if I ever heard it; never knowingly ran into an INFJ that's THAT crazy, yet my s.o.'s mother does the same thing...and yet she's an xSFJ. Then again, let's just say she's taking pills that shouldn't be mixed...

On another note, I think, unfortunately, a lot of INFJs FEEL like they're unhealthy because they live in a world of concrete/scientific that doesn't necessarily reward them for the mystical methods they employ for understanding the world (ENFJs tend to have an easier time because they don't LIVE in their Ni, but rather their Fe, which ultimately rewards them more in the long-run). And because they FEEL unhealthy, it's like they tear down some wall of denial and then start ACTING even more unhealthy. My mother is an INFJ who, when she is unhealthy, walls herself off in her room and plays Plants vs Zombies. And then when I come in to see her, while she doesn't reject my presence, she starts flatly/depressedly telling me about how she can't get any peace or be left alone long enough to get anything done.

I would assume that most infj's WOULD go THAT CRAZY when their parent dies. They are super emotional and family oriented, dude looked like he wanted to nuke the world. He thought no one could understand his feelings, and he was just a total mess. Well this particular infj had a close relationship with his father, can't say all infj's I guess because their father could be different types, but even so I would assume the infj would still mourn nearly the same.

 

[TSDesigner]

Unhealthy INFJ's are know-it-alls. The have the gross delusion that they have the answer for everything, but they don't. I think all INFJ's are like this but maybe more mildly than the unhealthy ones.

They want to give advice to everyone and be their counselor/therapist. This seems to me to be a symptom of thinking you know so much that you're qualified to give everyone your advice. I had an actual INFJ therapist with a PhD in psychology and she didn't know jack shit about how to help me. She was completely worthless. She didn't even make me feel good like my first therapist did. And she said some mean things to me. I gave up on therapists after her.

I knew an INFJ who thought she should be allowed to make decisions in a company and demanded it, because she thought she could run it better, but she was really just crazy and her real problem was she just needed to shut up, stop complaining, and do her own job better in order to make more money.

 

[lulabelle]

This one unhealthy INFJ I came across online was an obsessive, paranoid know-it-all. She was convinced that her Ni picked up on the truth of the situation, which was that I was a narcissist and proceeded to stalk me and tell everyone not to respond to me. I think enneagram (and a troubled background) had a lot to do with her specific issues, but unhealthy INFJs are definitely know-it-alls.

 

[1487610420]

This one unhealthy INFJ I came across online was an obsessive, paranoid know-it-all. She was convinced that her Ni picked up on the truth of the situation, which was that I was a narcissist and proceeded to stalk me and tell everyone not to respond to me. I think enneagram (and a troubled background) had a lot to do with her specific issues, but unhealthy INFJs are definitely know-it-alls.

Wow, I'm shocked, I've never heard of such things being said about INFJs.

 

[EtaCarinae]

I think being an unhealthy INFJ doesn't necessarily have to correlate with behaving like their shadow type ESTP or immersing themselves in unhealthy Se stuff. I've read somewhere that they are one of the types that is most prone to mental disorders in general.
Well, for me being an unhealthy INFJ meant experiencing severe anxiety and OCD in 2011. Worst time of my life.
Probably everybody's gonna experience the "dark night of the soul" at some point in their life, but I think with INFJs this can go especially deep. I have to think of this articles on Stellar Maze where he says that Fi is the id function for INFJs.

 

[Duffy]

I think being an unhealthy INFJ doesn't necessarily have to correlate with behaving like their shadow type ESTP or immersing themselves in unhealthy Se stuff.

People take this aspect and blow it out of proportion. Part of it does have to do with Se, but it doesn't mean they start looking like one.

 

[cascadeco]

This one unhealthy INFJ I came across online was an obsessive, paranoid know-it-all. She was convinced that her Ni picked up on the truth of the situation, which was that I was a narcissist and proceeded to stalk me and tell everyone not to respond to me. I think enneagram (and a troubled background) had a lot to do with her specific issues, but unhealthy INFJs are definitely know-it-alls.

There have been one or two unhealthy INFJ's on the forum in times past. Sort of related to this, I think it was more just this general thing of being totally out of touch with reality and 100% wrapped up in their own bizarre view of things/the world/case they've built up in their mind - and yes, 100% right and no ability to take in other information that might go against. They can be aggressive. I don't think this happens often, but yeah, I think paranoia plays into it for sure. (INTJ's are no different)

 

[Doctor Cringelord]

I sense....upsetedness

 

[inner_silence]

Well, for me being an unhealthy INFJ meant experiencing severe anxiety and OCD in 2011. Worst time of my life.
Probably everybody's gonna experience the "dark night of the soul" at some point in their life, but I think with INFJs this can go especially deep. I have to think of this articles on Stellar Maze where he says that Fi is the id function for INFJs.

This.
That article explained to me what I had been going through for the last 5 years.
All the way through Fi -> Si.
When that happens your body becomes a prison, where you feel so uncomfortable with any physical sensation you want to escape but you have Ni convictions about pointlessness of suicide... So you cannot FEEL you just exist in this physical shell which, if that was not enough, keeps getting more and more ill because of how mind stuff is easily reflected on the body in INFJs. You are in the shell but at the same time separate from everything both physical and metaphysical. Just hanging in this blank cold empty space completely out of touch with the world, with things you loved, and with your real self.

But since mind and body have to a) keep some kind of activity b) somehow pull you back and show you what you must fix, they put you through all sorts of Se trips.
Bulimia, OCD, depression, panic attacks. This list seems very innocent comparing to the overall condition of that time. Which was HELL.

Beside the point perhaps, but since I was not capable of any creative activity at that point, I let out my Fe little by little through talking to someone patient who accepted anything, anytime. Then at some point I was able to come out of Si and FEEL negative stuff not run from it -> wallow in Fi for a while wondering what to do with it -> let it out with more talking Fe -> become able to write/ sing etc. again, and it was uphill from there.

I suppose being careful with shutting down their emotions/parts of themselves would not hurt any INFJ

 

[lulabelle]

There have been one or two unhealthy INFJ's on the forum in times past. Sort of related to this, I think it was more just this general thing of being totally out of touch with reality and 100% wrapped up in their own bizarre view of things/the world/case they've built up in their mind - and yes, 100% right and no ability to take in other information that might go against. They can be aggressive. I don't think this happens often, but yeah, I think paranoia plays into it for sure. (INTJ's are no different)

Yup, she was a self-described enneagram 6, which when unhealthy is an intensely paranoid and suspicious type. So this combined with Ni was a pretty lethal combo to deal with; there's literally no dealing with a person like this.

 

[Forever]

Lol this thread again.

 

[Kerik_S]

SOURCE: Recovering from a six-year-long bout of Sertraline-induced INFJ-ism. And my mother is an INFJ if there ever was one.

Zoloft made you INFJ? I heard depression tends to socially demotivate people and that SSRIs simply restore lost social motivation (among other things), and that they just decrease neuroticism and increase extroversion.

I've taken various SSRIs and SNRIs, and all they really seem to do is change my overall energy level (either net minus or net plus) so I can incorporate more socialization in without getting completely sapped overall (in the case of net plus) or by allowing me to get less "activated" in the first place so I can spend more time with people at a slower "drain" (although my overall energy is lower than without that particular medication).

What type are you sans-psychotropic-medications?