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[INFP] Why are you so quiet?

Tropics

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Aug 26, 2008
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75
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INFP
I am so sick of this question, it's usually asked like an accusation. It's like if you're not shooting your mouth off all the time and saying something and trying to get the attention everybody gets all concerned and sooner or later one of them asks THE question. It is so irritating because usually they are interrupting a very good train of thought. Does any other INFP's or other introverts get this?!
 

Jack Flak

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I usually get asked "Why are you gripping that knife so vigorously while staring into my eyes and twitching?" but yeah, that too.
 

heart

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I get it all the time in offline life, like a broken record from hell.
 

Anonymous

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I am so sick of this question, it's usually asked like an accusation. It's like if you're not shooting your mouth off all the time and saying something and trying to get the attention everybody gets all concerned and sooner or later one of them asks THE question. It is so irritating because usually they are interrupting a very good train of thought. Does any other INFP's or other introverts get this?!

Yeah, this annoys me too, though I haven't really encountered it since high school. It's as if it's my responsibility to be talking as much as the other person.
 

sassafrassquatch

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I've always gotten that. People have always been telling me to smile, too. I should put a smile on their faces.

*chews knife blade.
 

Kasper

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:yes:

Always get the combination of "quiet" and "smile" as in your so quiet I don't know if you're ok unless you smile resulting in a demand for me to grin like a fool :steam:
 

Cimarron

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Would you rather I yell? :huh:
 

Tropics

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I get the smile thing too, quite regularly and then like a "good little" INFP I oblige cause I don't want to hurt the persons feelings. Sometimes it gets me extremely cranky though and that smile IS NOT happening, I just ignore the person and act like I never heard but 9 times out of 10 I smile though. I need some backbone!
 

Giggly

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When I was a teenager, another girl told me that I laugh too much. She said it was annoying. That made me self-conscious about it for a while but I just couldn't stop so I just said to hell with her and forgot about it.

The older I get the funnier things get too.

I also have never had the "why are you so quiet?" question. Mostly because I tend to gravitate towards quiet people (I like them a lot) and I guess I talk more than they do. When I get around really talkative people, I tend to not talk and listen to them.

I have asked the question to certain people before in the past though. :blush:
 

nolla

Senor Membrane
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May 22, 2008
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I am so sick of this question, it's usually asked like an accusation.

Better than "why won't you shut up?", isn't it? I've heard them both (and that I'm too loud), but in a more friendly tone. It never seemed like an accusation to me. I've also heard that I laugh too much, but then again I hear often that one of my good features is my laugh.

So, I dont bother to think about these things too much.
 

Snail

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I get "Why are you so quiet?" and "Why don't you smile?" all the time. In case anyone really wants the answer, I'm quiet because I don't have anything I feel like communicating right now, and I'm probably thinking about something interesting that I'd rather not talk about until I get it all worked out in my head. I'm not smiling because it's inauthentic to smile unless I feel like it, and I'd rather not be fake about my feelings. If I must smile to put you at ease, I will, because I aim to please. I just don't like being forced to choose between being honest and being kind, because I'd really like to be both.
 

Thursday

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i just realized how much i dislike overly extroverted people.
and i get it like its a sign on my head
" ask me about my laconic nature "
 

runvardh

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Because I have nothing to say on this tediously boring subject that won't be skipped over anyway...
 

Dwigie

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Aug 25, 2008
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Yeah me too, why don't you smile, why don't you talk. I don't have anything to say to them.o_O...Funny though I ask my enfp sister the opposite: why are you always talking to me? I want to be alone.She actually keeps talking xD....
 

sade

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Aug 23, 2008
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No one's ever asked, then again I sometimes warn people of it out of politeness.
Some have thought I just don't want to talk.
Once I received a comment that "I know you well enough not to get insulted by the quietness." Uhh? But that was my aunt, who is really extroverted as a person..
 

Dwigie

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Aug 25, 2008
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658
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Yeah, appearantly being quiet comes across as "I think i'm too good to talk to you..a.k.a snobbism" I went to do an internship in a restaurant once and well since I barely talked and came from a relatively good school they took it an as me being a snob or being disgusted my the kitchen o.o...
 

Tropics

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I get "Why are you so quiet?" and "Why don't you smile?" all the time. In case anyone really wants the answer, I'm quiet because I don't have anything I feel like communicating right now, and I'm probably thinking about something interesting that I'd rather not talk about until I get it all worked out in my head. I'm not smiling because it's inauthentic to smile unless I feel like it, and I'd rather not be fake about my feelings. If I must smile to put you at ease, I will, because I aim to please. I just don't like being forced to choose between being honest and being kind, because I'd really like to be both.

Ditto! You just summed it up perfectly for me right there, that's exactly how I feel!:)
 

colmena

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I am mostly quiet because it upsets me when people are loud. Plus calm almost always seems the logical approach.
 
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