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[ENFJ] ENFJ and ISTP conflict?

great_bay

New member
Joined
Jan 29, 2015
Messages
987
MBTI Type
intp
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I have never seen these types interact. However, what conflict that might arised from these two types?
 

Jet Stream

Permabanned
Joined
Mar 25, 2015
Messages
312
MBTI Type
istp
Enneagram
gvf
Potential conflict:

Roomates of these types have had it up to here with each other. The ISTP is guzzling down all the breast milk out of the fridge before the ENFJ's toddler can even taste a drop. When confronted, the ISTP is too absorbed in his newest issuse of Automobile magazine to pay attention. The ENFJ shouts and screams so spiritedly she has a stroke. This puts the ISTP in inferior Fe neurotic panic mode, and his distractions cause him to accidentally ring a ruthless thug instead of the police, and when the criminal realizes who the ISTP was intending to contact, he becomes paranoid, tracks down the location on the other end of the line, and fatally shoots the ISTP. Moments before, the ENFJ had died as well from stroke complications. The toddler grows up motherless and develops into an extremely unhealthy ENFJ bent on murdering all ISTPs she encounters.
 

1487610420

Permabanned
Joined
Apr 13, 2009
Messages
6,426
Potential conflict:

Roomates of these types have had it up to here with each other. The ISTP is guzzling down all the breast milk out of the fridge before the ENFJ's toddler can even taste a drop. When confronted, the ISTP is too absorbed in his newest issuse of Automobile magazine to pay attention. The ENFJ shouts and screams so spiritedly she has a stroke. This puts the ISTP in inferior Fe neurotic panic mode, and his distractions cause him to accidentally ring a ruthless thug instead of the police, and when the criminal realizes who the ISTP was intending to contact, he becomes paranoid, tracks down the location on the other end of the line, and fatally shoots the ISTP. Moments before, the ENFJ had died as well from stroke complications. The toddler grows up motherless and develops into an extremely unhealthy ENFJ bent on murdering all ISTPs she encounters.

Tru storey
 

great_bay

New member
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Jan 29, 2015
Messages
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intp
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How often do ISTP's encounter ENFJ's given that they're so rare?
 

á´…eparted

passages
Joined
Jan 25, 2014
Messages
8,265
I'm friends with an ISTP. We aren't super close but we get along pretty well despite the differences. What helps is our political and moral outlook is nearly identical.
 

KitchenFly

Member
Joined
Feb 5, 2015
Messages
876
I know a married couple that have been married for at lest 40 years she is ENFJ and he is ISTP it has worked well and they raised two girls and three boys.

I think the reason it works well is that she is Sx/So and he is So/Sp her conches being Sx balances against his mood Sx her So agenda of her Sx/So balances well with his agenda Sp of his So/Sp.

The conflict is balance by the two connection in both instinctual triangles firstly the line between 8 & 5 and secondly the line between 1 & 6.

Conflict rises when mood is not held in check. Behaviour and ethos is the sticky point for these two individuals her behaviour and his ethos. Luckily the Sx/So helps her keep her behaviour in check and his So/Sp helps him to keep his ethos in check.

She is 2w1 ENFJ.
He is 3w4 ISTP.
 
Last edited:

anniekaitlyn

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Jun 7, 2015
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1
MBTI Type
ENFJ
Enneagram
4w3
I have never seen these types interact. However, what conflict that might arised from these two types?

My mom is an ISTP and I'm an ENFJ. Growing up, I always felt like she lacked passion and didn't provide any structure as a parent. I was verbally critical of her when I was a teenager.

She isn't affectionate, and I'm often hugging her and sitting near her (to her annoyance). We have an excellent relationship, though. It's hard to explain. I respect her very much - I see her as wise, independent, hard-working, tolerant. I think she sees me as emotional, loving, affectionate, creative...but probably a bit too chatty and maybe over-the-top with my ideas and desire to chat.

We have disagreements when she is stubborn about doing things her way, and I seek change and improvement (i.e. I want her to be more physically active and try to get her to exercise with me, and she tends to become defensive and annoyed by the pressure I put on her to improve her current well-being.)

She also doesn't like it when I cry. Especially when it's about the same thing more than once.

She's a database designer (computer programmer). I'm a dentist. We both are very good at what we do, but tend not to understand each other's work.

She's a great mom, but tough to have as a mom when you're Fe. Love her though.
 

great_bay

New member
Joined
Jan 29, 2015
Messages
987
MBTI Type
intp
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My mom is an ISTP and I'm an ENFJ. Growing up, I always felt like she lacked passion and didn't provide any structure as a parent. I was verbally critical of her when I was a teenager.

She isn't affectionate, and I'm often hugging her and sitting near her (to her annoyance). We have an excellent relationship, though. It's hard to explain. I respect her very much - I see her as wise, independent, hard-working, tolerant. I think she sees me as emotional, loving, affectionate, creative...but probably a bit too chatty and maybe over-the-top with my ideas and desire to chat.

We have disagreements when she is stubborn about doing things her way, and I seek change and improvement (i.e. I want her to be more physically active and try to get her to exercise with me, and she tends to become defensive and annoyed by the pressure I put on her to improve her current well-being.)

She also doesn't like it when I cry. Especially when it's about the same thing more than once.

She's a database designer (computer programmer). I'm a dentist. We both are very good at what we do, but tend not to understand each other's work.

She's a great mom, but tough to have as a mom when you're Fe. Love her though.

What do you think of her Ti function?
 

chriiisss

New member
Joined
Jun 18, 2015
Messages
1
MBTI Type
enfj
I dated an istp for a long time, and found myself fighting with him a lot because we just didn't see things the same way. Things I felt were obvious, were lost on him and things he felt didn't need to be said or assured would leave me clingy and irrational. It was really frustrating. We work incredibly well as friends, but I just don't think istp's know what to do with our overly emotional reactions in relationships.. (Which made me incredibly irrational and overdramatic.. Which I hate)
 

á´…eparted

passages
Joined
Jan 25, 2014
Messages
8,265
I dated an istp for a long time, and found myself fighting with him a lot because we just didn't see things the same way. Things I felt were obvious, were lost on him and things he felt didn't need to be said or assured would leave me clingy and irrational. It was really frustrating. We work incredibly well as friends, but I just don't think istp's know what to do with our overly emotional reactions in relationships.. (Which made me incredibly irrational and overdramatic.. Which I hate)

I don't think it's fair to say all ISTP's don't know what to do with our reactions. Many don't of course, but I've met one that gets them rather well. He may not experience them, but he is able to comprehend where it comes from. ENFJ's and ISTP's actually aren't all that different. As is the case with the other opposite pairings.
 
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