[ENFP] Do other NFs feel like they observe their feelings more than live them?

[Avocado]

I dunno. You just don't strike me Ne to any degree. Your intuition is in a band similar to what I've studied/know of Si types.

I don't intend to turn the conversation to this. But, take [MENTION=22109]Evee[/MENTION]'s post. That seems more NFish.

Interesting. I am caught between being deadpan and an ideal to be compassionate to all living beings. I feel a bit like the observers from fringe, especially September.

 

[Starry]

Head Type. And the reason I believe your ignored feelings build and build until they eventually cause the damn to break and you'll have a "I'm worthless and life is too painful" outburst episode.

It's a curious thing though that they describe 7s as only ignoring pain when everything I've ever seen, heard via first hand accounts and personally have experienced demonstrates that many 7s won't allow themselves to experience any strong (authentic) emotion including the positive ones. I can remember many times in my life.... when I had finally reached *a moment* I had always dreamed of reaching only to discover I'm completely removed from it. Like I remember standing in front of the great pyramid of Giza having dreamed of it from childhood...knowing what it took for me to get there...knowing it was high on my "things to do before I die" list...and I was entirely disconnected because it was too profound...too much. And I was so mad and frustrated with myself...and refused to leave until I connected. Which I did...but it wasn't an easy process for me. It was like I was shut out and needed to find a hidden door into the moment. Into the joy.

 

[Mal12345]

I have frequent intense mood shifts, but it is like I am observing the emotions more that actually living through them. Is that strange?

That is a known trait of the ENFP. It is also been known for ENFP types to have out-of-body experiences in which they believe they are observing themselves or the scene they are in.

 

[Avocado]

That is a known trait of the ENFP. It is also been known for ENFP types to have out-of-body experiences in which they believe they are observing themselves or the scene they are in.

I had those more when I was younger.

 

[Avocado]

Head Type. And the reason I believe your ignored feelings build and build until they eventually cause the damn to break and you'll have a "I'm worthless and life is too painful" outburst episode.

It's a curious thing though that they describe 7s as only ignoring pain when everything I've ever seen, heard via first hand accounts and personally have experienced demonstrates that many 7s won't allow themselves to experience any strong (authentic) emotion including the positive ones. I can remember many times in my life.... when I had finally reached *a moment* I had always dreamed of reaching only to discover I'm completely removed from it. Like I remember standing in front of the great pyramid of Giza having dreamed of it from childhood...knowing what it took for me to get there...knowing it was high on my "things to do before I die" list...and I was entirely disconnected because it was too profound...too much. And I was so mad and frustrated with myself...and refused to leave until I connected. Which I did...but it wasn't an easy process for me. It was like I was shut out and needed to find a hidden door into the moment. Into the joy.

YES!!!!

That is why I obsess over passion. I should connect with the moment, but I never have time. It always bothers me when I don't have the time to live.

 

[HongDou]

Head Type.

Is it really? Am I just more connected to my feelings than most head types or is it just an issue some head types struggle with or what? Or am I so pain-avoidant that I'm unaware of how disconnected from my emotions I am and I'm just blissfully unaware? Because idk...my feelings usually overwhelm how I carry myself throughout the day and once I feel something it usually constantly occupies my mind after that until I just go to sleep or listen to music.

It's a curious thing though that they describe 7s as only ignoring pain when everything I've ever seen, heard via first hand accounts and personally have experienced demonstrates that many 7s won't allow themselves to experience any strong (authentic) emotion including the positive ones. I can remember many times in my life.... when I had finally reached *a moment* I had always dreamed of reaching only to discover I'm completely removed from it. Like I remember standing in front of the great pyramid of Giza having dreamed of it from childhood...knowing what it took for me to get there...knowing it was high on my "things to do before I die" list...and I was entirely disconnected because it was too profound...too much. And I was so mad and frustrated with myself...and refused to leave until I connected. Which I did...but it wasn't an easy process for me. It was like I was shut out and needed to find a hidden door into the moment. Into the joy.

I think it's amazing how you stuck to your guns and stayed until you felt that merging with the moment. But idk this gets to me too Starry...just last night I was out stargazing with friends. In the periods of silence I felt I was able to take everything in and feel all the emotions rushing at me as they came even though I had no outward reaction like crying or jumping for joy haha. It actually bothers me when people are always so busy worrying about little things or not taking anything seriously that they're not able to take everything in and see the beauty of it, because that's what I like to do every time I go on an adventure. It just doesn't feel as fulfilling unless I feel I've connected with the experience. Stop confusing me!!

 

[Ghost]

If something emotionally intense is going on, I try to avoiding thinking or feeling anything about it. Inside there's this buzzy sort of anxiety. Mentally, it's like steering a boat through shark-infested waters. Those emotions and thoughts are waiting to chomp me to bits if I slip into the water. I can't think about what's troubling me because that's touching the water. After I've calmed down (maybe hours to a week later), I can sit and dissect it. At that point, it's like I'm running on parallel tracks—one track is for considering what's going on and how I got there, the other is for feeling a weakened version of the emotion. That helps me get over it or at least accept the situation.

I'd liken it to a physical injury. First, here's a flash of alarm and pain. I know what happened and where it happened, but I'm too surprised and hurt to go beyond that. As I get used to it or as it dulls, I can figure out exactly what hurts and how to live with it.

I like emotions and consider myself a very emotional person. I just don't like being overwhelmed by them or whatever is causing them.

It's a curious thing though that they describe 7s as only ignoring pain when everything I've ever seen, heard via first hand accounts and personally have experienced demonstrates that many 7s won't allow themselves to experience any strong (authentic) emotion including the positive ones. I can remember many times in my life.... when I had finally reached *a moment* I had always dreamed of reaching only to discover I'm completely removed from it.

Oh, wow. I relate to this. I've gotten so used to stepping away from or smothering strong emotions as they're happening that I'm not sure how to accept them in the moment. I guess it's fine. It means even good news seems less wonderful, though, which is kind of disappointing.

 

[Starry]

YES!!!!

That is why I obsess over passion. I should connect with the moment, but I never have time. It always bothers me when I don't have the time to live.

Haha. bright red.

Yah, because it often takes conscious effort on my part for me to connect with the moment I fiercely resent the way in which our worldly institutions are structured (like your various "World" threads.) But I also work against myself. I'll think I 'don't have the time' to connect with the moment for various reasons when in truth I'm unknowingly making plans for the future/living in the future...because that's where I feel safe. Somewhere along the way I learned that connecting with the moment (in its entirety) is too powerful and potentially painful.

 

[Starry]

If something emotionally intense is going on, I try to avoiding thinking or feeling anything about it. Inside there's this buzzy sort of anxiety. Mentally, it's like steering a boat through shark-infested waters. Those emotions and thoughts are waiting to chomp me to bits if I slip into the water. I can't think about what's troubling me because that's touching the water. After I've calmed down (maybe hours to a week later), I can sit and dissect it. At that point, it's like I'm running on parallel tracks—one track is for considering what's going on and how I got there, the other is for feeling a weakened version of the emotion. That helps me get over it or at least accept the situation.

I'd liken it to a physical injury. First, here's a flash of alarm and pain. I know what happened and where it happened, but I'm too surprised and hurt to go beyond that. As I get used to it or as it dulls, I can figure out exactly what hurts and how to live with it.

I like emotions and consider myself a very emotional person. I just don't like being overwhelmed by them or whatever is causing them.



Oh, wow. I relate to this. I've gotten so used to stepping away from or smothering strong emotions as they're happening that I'm not sure how to accept them in the moment. I guess it's fine. It means even good news seems less wonderful, though, which is kind of disappointing.

I almost responded..."that may be due to having 7 in your tritype" ...until I noticed 173 was your post count wtf Starry? haha please know that I have a massive cold.

edit: although it may be due to having 7 in your tritype haha...or being a 9...idk haha

 

[Avocado]

Haha. bright red.

Yah, because it often takes conscious effort on my part for me to connect with the moment I fiercely resent the way in which our worldly institutions are structured (like your various "World" threads.) But I also work against myself. I'll think I 'don't have the time' to connect with the moment for various reasons when in truth I'm unknowingly making plans for the future/living in the future...because that's where I feel safe. Somewhere along the way I learned that connecting with the moment (in its entirety) is too powerful and potentially painful.

I live in a future which may never be.

There are many roads not taken. If one chooses not to have children, they will miss out on the joys of parenthood. If one has children young, they will not experience a chance to be free to pursue their own agenda, which may be just as rewarding. If one has children when they are older, they may lack the energy to play with them or something may happen to where they cannot have children at all. There are many possible futures.

 

[Starry]

Is it really? Am I just more connected to my feelings than most head types or is it just an issue some head types struggle with or what? Or am I so pain-avoidant that I'm unaware of how disconnected from my emotions I am and I'm just blissfully unaware? Because idk...my feelings usually overwhelm how I carry myself throughout the day and once I feel something it usually constantly occupies my mind after that until I just go to sleep or listen to music.

Umm no, I don't think you're more connected to your feelings than other head types... (whaddayah think your better than all of us? Is that what this is all about huh? )

Please read the following passage paying special attention to and subsequently memorizing the bolded.

NFPs feel. That's what we do. We feel and we feel with great intensity. Everything's big...big love, big sadness, big joy, big hatred. I mean, I remember a conversation I had with a 5w4...where this individual expressed to me that they knew they were feeling something about something...but just couldn't figure out what that was. And I was like WTF? My feelings are like freakin entities in the same room with me.

I think it's gravely misinformed to think of e7s as only wanting to avoid pain. 'Pain' should be replaced with 'intensity of feeling' as I know many 7s that will deny/minimize their joy as well...it is just a bit more difficult to tell in such instances due to, again, how intensely we actually feel (our joy is most often welcomed by others...but I doubt we received a lot of positive reinforcement in our formative years when we unleashed our intensity of anger or sadness.

Entities in the same room.

I've read/heard theorists state that 7s became 7s because they had a primary caregiver that for whatever reason rejected the intensity of their feelings/sensitivities/moods. I've read/heard that experiencing emotions blocks access to "Pe moving out into the future." I've read/heard that the future focus is what keeps us from experiencing pain and so on...

What I think is that somewhere along the line a 7 started using optimism as a way to emotionally support themselves in what is so often a harsh and confusing world. Things may not be good now...but at some point in the future everything will be perfect.[/IÂ¥ A 7 can feel...and feel intensely any feeling that doesn't jeopardize that support system...which will be unique to each 7.

I'll have to come back to this at some point in the future. I can't breathe through my nose right now.

I think it's amazing how you stuck to your guns and stayed until you felt that merging with the moment. But idk this gets to me too Starry...just last night I was out stargazing with friends. In the periods of silence I felt I was able to take everything in and feel all the emotions rushing at me as they came even though I had no outward reaction like crying or jumping for joy haha. It actually bothers me when people are always so busy worrying about little things or not taking anything seriously that they're not able to take everything in and see the beauty of it, because that's what I like to do every time I go on an adventure. It just doesn't feel as fulfilling unless I feel I've connected with the experience. Stop confusing me!!

 

[skylights]

I've always felt like there's an ocean inside of me, and I can barely get away from it.

But, from what I understand, this is for me part of e6's reactivity. I distance myself using analytical thought after the immediate emotional response. It's part of why I like writing so much. It helps me distance myself from that overwhelming ocean of feeling.

it took a couple hours for me to actually authentically feel it, though I knew it was coming...

That kind of delay isn't unusual, especially after experiencing a shock. It took me months before I finally really cried after my grandpa's death. I knew that I was horribly sad, but I just felt so hollow for the longest time. Then all of a sudden, maybe three months after, I was sitting at home one day, and it was like this deep well of feeling just opened up inside, and I felt everything all at once.

I wonder if our psyches try to protect ourselves sometimes.

 

[Avocado]

I've always felt like there's an ocean inside of me, and I can barely get away from it.

But, from what I understand, this is for me part of e6's reactivity. I distance myself using analytical thought after the immediate emotional response. It's part of why I like writing so much. It helps me distance myself from that overwhelming ocean of feeling.



That kind of delay isn't unusual, especially after experiencing a shock. It took me months before I finally really cried after my grandpa's death. I knew that I was horribly sad, but I just felt so hollow for the longest time. Then all of a sudden, maybe three months after, I was sitting at home one day, and it was like this deep well of feeling just opened up inside, and I felt everything all at once.

I wonder if our psyches try to protect ourselves sometimes.

Yes, that is how it is.

 

[Siúil a Rúin]

I have a split experience where I observe and experience intermittently and sometimes simultaneously. I've developed the ability to be observer and experiencer at the same time especially when feeling something overwhelming. I feel like I'm outside myself observing myself and reactions just like I would observe another person. It sometimes helps to calm me down except for when it is especially intense.

 

[five sounds]

ok something that just went through my head that reminded me of this thread.

i am looking at my collection of tattoo pictures where i think about getting tattoos kind of imaginarily and with varying degrees of seriousness. i just had the thought that i'm already getting kind of used to the idea of having a tattoo, having had this collection building over longer than two years. i bet when i get one, it like won't even be that big a deal, and i could probably get something kind of big my first time, just for having gone through it so many times in my head. the future planning leads to desensitization for the real event. also real events are so...real. flawed. not as we imagined them. which to me is the exciting/kinda scary part. i know that. i'm excited for the unknown variables and they're part of the reason i still get a thrill and want to go through with it. but it still makes real life fall flat sometimes.

and now i am going to pass out from nyquil.