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[MBTI General] INFP with ENFJ/ESFJ?

disregard

mrs
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
7,826
MBTI Type
INFP
Well.. it would depend on how compatible you and the other individual are. (Compatible in terms other than how you perceive and judge your environment). Is there chemistry? Mutual respect? Common interests?

(I have had successful relationships/friendships with both ENFJ & ESFJ)
 

Kanerou

New member
Joined
Jul 1, 2008
Messages
29
MBTI Type
_NFP
I meant more in general than anything, although I know a male ENFJ and a male ESFJ. The ENFJ is fine; we get along well. Good to talk to. I greatly admire the ESFJ (I hate to use the word "idolize", but something similar), but his "let me take care of you" attitude and stubbornness give me the urge to throttle him. My mother might be ESFJ, and while we get along well, she can sometimes drive me nuts. Hence me wondering why on earth ESFJs are supposed to be a good match. I was curious about the ENFJ thing, too, though.
 

file cabinet

New member
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
411
I like the following post by rubysera on INFP Global Chatter...

[...] I think maybe the ESFJ is attractive to the INFP because of the ESFJ's warm extraverted feeling that takes a warm interest in the INFP. This feels so friendly and good to the INFP that the INFP thinks this is going to be a great relationship. But as time goes on, the initial warmth of the ESFJ wears off and the ESFJ expects the INFP to at least be conventional when in public or when hosting. Also, the INFP is disappointed when the initial warmth wears off and the relationship does not grow deeper as the INFP had fully expected. Thus, the ESFJ expects the INFP to convert to conventional social norms while the INFP expects the initial warmth of the ESFJ to grow into a really deep and intimate relationship. Both parties eventually feel short-changed and things go from bad to worse and ever more worse. Ideally, it doesn't have to be this way but I think maybe that is what often happens.

Source:
infp.globalchatter.com :: View topic - ESFJ and INFP: Can it work?

and you can read the start of the thread here.
 
Joined
Jul 3, 2008
Messages
1,858
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
54
Instinctual Variant
so/sp
yeah, ESFJs are like a car stuck in its track at an amusement park. I can handle a conversation but forget hanging out.
 
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