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[Jungian Cognitive Functions] INFJ or INTJ response to stress?

alcea rosea

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Lack of concentration / quality of work declining, yes. Emotional outbursts, again, I don't do it and my friend doesn't. I brought up my friend precisely because of the emotional stress in her personal life whilst going to work - she was under immense stress (divorce, while simultaneously learning her sister had cancer, then caring for her sister while she went through chemo), and what I described in my first post is how she was - she'd go into the bathroom to cry.

I agree with this. I am, actually, under tremendous amounts of stress at the moment, and I deal much the way you have described. Sometimes things slip, and sometimes I need to go hide in the bathroom and cry. I will do everything in my power to avoid an emotional display, especially at work.

Yes, i think her reaction is of INTJ's whose enneagram type is 1 and she reacts to stress by becoming very emotional. Overly so.

I wonder if F types are more prone to hide emotions when stressed out?
 

cascadeco

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Yeah, me too. Especially in a work setting, as I just don't think it's the place at work to let my personal life seep into it.

Another anecdote, years ago my former ENTJ friend and I got into a bit of a conflict. We'd been slowly parting and the friendship had been dissipating over the months (just over time talking/hanging out less), but in the final 'conflict' she was very heated and threw out some hurtful insults at me, and I made it a point to stay calm / try to keep my emotions out of it. She didn't like this, called me robotic, etc. My point being, I do think emotion comes out for T's more in stress. They start unraveling, and F's might in some cases become colder or more withdrawn. (She too during that period was going through some stress, and I've since learned that during that time she lashed out at several of her friends and now regrets a lot of that) Obv. depends on the people/relationship though.
 

INTJMom

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Maybe I'm making a wrong conclusion here ( her being INFJ), i don' t know. Lots of emotions included anyway.

Both INFJs and INTJs can become very "hedonistic" when stressed or "beside themselves".

The thing is... in Quenk's book, INFJs and INTJs are described in the same chapter as having almost identical behavior when stressed, so you can't look at the general behavior to help you decide which she is.
 

Fidelia

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I really hate showing strong emotion in front of other people. It's intensely embarrassing to me and the very few times that I have were only after being under superhuman amounts of stress for an extended time and I cried because I was so angry. Even then, I think one person may have seen me on my way to the bathroom. What I would consider an emotional outburst would be different than what others would. I get more withdrawn, scattered and irritable under stress, but generally not more publicly emotive. In my very inner circle, I might be slightly more open, but still quite restrained in that regard.
 

Z Buck McFate

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I’m with the INFJs who have basically said they withdraw. The only time I ever have an outburst is if someone is relentless in not letting me withdraw, then I may lash out a tiny bit to make it clearer that I really need to be left alone (and then I’ll avoid that person like the plague thereafter, because I absolutely loathe being pushed to the point of having an emotional outburst). But yeah, if I feel myself on the cusp of an outburst or if I can’t keep it together I’ll go (flee, actually) in the bathroom (or more likely my car, or some storage closet) to collect my composure. Mostly stress makes me feel the need to withdraw and my ability to interact with the external environment starts shutting down- the less time I get alone to counteract this, the more balls I start to drop all over the place. I’m okay with showing emotion to people I trust and I’m close to, but not if it’s the person who is upsetting me- I need to wait till the agitation passes before talking to the source of my stress.
 

alcea rosea

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It is strange ( or is it?) that I myself seem to have similar reaction about not showing my emotions in public ( except the positive ones) than INFJ's here. Is it Fe? I have pretty strong Fe even if I'm ENFP....

About the person in the OP. I finally know the cause for her recent behavior. It had to do with totally other things than where she did show her emotional outbursts. So her "hate" had wrong targets, unfortunately. Innocent people had to "suffer" which sucks. But it's good things are now seen as they are. Still kind of uncertain of her type (she tested as INfJ) but her enneagram type is 1, that I can see.
 

Starry

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Still kind of uncertain of her type (she tested as INfJ) but her enneagram type is 1, that I can see.

I kinda notice a trend on this site...that whenever anyone attempts to link INFJ to 'emotional outbursts'...people (of all MBTI types) will basically show-up to post some version of 'I highly doubt this individual is an INFJ.' And so...idk...in case you are left with some question marks over your head...

Of the two INFJs (yes, actual INFJs) I have known irl...one (6w5 cp) has absolutely no problem with 'emotional outbursts' or causing a scene and doesn't even experience a sense of embarrassment or anything afterward...no joke. And I believe it is due to a sense of total confidence in her own 'rightness' and the 'rightness' of whatever 'cause' she is fighting (whether the 'cause' exists in reality or not). Second INFJ (5w4)...now his 'baseline personality' is more in line with what people would accept as 'being INFJ'...but he's incredibily moody...and in no way a stranger to the 'emotional outburst'...even in public. But these will be fairly quick bursts of anger/attack...always followed by intense shame, embarrassment and withdrawl.

So yah...it happens.
 

Coriolis

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I wonder if INFJ's and INTJ's have different way to react when they feel personally hurt or personally not considered as they would like to be considered? This all at work setting too. So, if INFJ / INTJ would feel personally hurt at work because they don't feel they are considered, would that cause a emotional burst against people about issues?

How about if INFJ/INTJ had personal problems? Would that "shine through" at work. Would emotional problems at home be seen in work life as lack of concentration and having emotional bursts that one wouldn't usually have?
What do you mean "they don't feel they are considered"? I find it almost impossible to take anything that goes on at work personally, so hardly ever feel "personally hurt". When something happens not to my liking, it is either important enough to address, in which case I focus on getting the desired outcome; or it is not, in which case I just move on. I can honestly say I have never had an emotional outburst at work (and rarely have them elsewhere). I just make sure it does not happen, because I consider it unprofessional and counterproductive.

When I have experienced personal issues over the years, work has actually been like a haven where I could escape it into something I could understand and control. It has always been a great stabilizing influence in my life. I doubt anyone at work had any idea of the personal issues ongoing at these times, except for my supervisor when it was necessary to request time off.

Lack of concentration / quality of work declining, yes. Emotional outbursts, again, I don't do it and my friend doesn't. I brought up my friend precisely because of the emotional stress in her personal life whilst going to work - she was under immense stress (divorce, while simultaneously learning her sister had cancer, then caring for her sister while she went through chemo), and what I described in my first post is how she was - she'd go into the bathroom to cry.
I have experienced this lack of concentration during periods of stress. For the most part, I have been able to keep it from affecting my work, but it has required much more effort than usual.

Another anecdote, years ago my former ENTJ friend and I got into a bit of a conflict. We'd been slowly parting and the friendship had been dissipating over the months (just over time talking/hanging out less), but in the final 'conflict' she was very heated and threw out some hurtful insults at me, and I made it a point to stay calm / try to keep my emotions out of it. She didn't like this, called me robotic, etc. My point being, I do think emotion comes out for T's more in stress. They start unraveling, and F's might in some cases become colder or more withdrawn.
Are you generalizing from this one example, or have you seen such behavior in Ts elsewhere? I am surprised, not so much because of the stereotypes, but because I do the highlighted myself. If you are correct, it might indicate that stress causes both types to act atypically, at least to the extent that they lose control of their behavior.
 

Siúil a Rúin

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My INFJ friend when under a lot of stress at work (she's had a few stressful periods over the past several years) says she just starts feeling super incompetent, isn't able to keep on top of things well, becomes more scatterbrained, but has never cited having emotional outbursts in front of others; if anything she becomes more withdrawn; I'd say from personal experience she also becomes more avoidant. She told me her 'outbursts' at work would involve going into the bathroom stalls and crying; so most of the emotion was tucked away from coworkers, it's just they would have noticed a decrease in the quality of her work and her being much more withdrawn.

I have to think enneagram would also tie into this and there'd be variation based on enneagram type too.
I agree that withdrawal under stress is a typical INFJ trait - first from others and then if intense enough from self as well. The Ni-Fe combination is dangerous for depression because it can construct global systems of negative emotion that go beyond present circumstance and apply to all of reality, so an individual negative event represents a large-scale negative phenomenon. The resulting existential isolation can create a cycle of withdrawal when emotions overwhelm leading to a burn-out of all emotional circuitry leaving some INFJs in a complete fog of detachment and numbness.
 

ScottJames

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I've been observing the behavior of this one woman for some time now. She is in a stressfull place and the sterss has been going on for some time now (around 6 months). I "know" that her type is INFJ or INTJ. I was wondering if her response to the stressfull situation is more typical to INFJ's or INTJs.

Her stress behavior:
She has become extremely emotional and gets really big emotional outbursts about things. She is still quite logical but her emotional response is not in line with subjects she talks about (it seems almost like something else is bothering her than what she talks about). She has become extremely picky on details while she is not normally like that (I mean she likes things are "the right way" but she isn't usually picky about details). She is rude to other people even if it's not her normal behavior. It seems that her main point these days is to show how wrong other people are. She isn't usually emotional at all (it's not seen) and she is usually very logical and sees the big picture.

What do you say? Typical stress behavior of INFJ or INTJ?

Sounds more INFJ to me. INTJs are more likely to become stubborn or passive aggressive when their in their 'lower selves' while INFJs are more likely to become critical or even cruel either by exploiting logical flaws in someone else's approach or using their Fe to find a soft spot and driving a dagger through it.
 
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