User Tag List

Results 1 to 6 of 6

  1. #1
    Senior Member Lily flower's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010

    Default Dislike "mixing" friends.

    I tend to have friends that are very different from one another and when we have a get-together/party, I find myself wanting to have a "homogenous" group of people. Somehow it stresses me to think of getting different types of people together. Other people I know will have a party and just invite everyone.

    Why is this? I was thinking that it might be because I act like a very different person with different groups of people, and having them together would be confusing, because I wouldn't know which one of me to be. It's not that I don't try to be myself - I am always myself. It's just that I respond to people differently.

  2. #2
    You have a choice! 21%'s Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009


    I'm exactly the same way! I find it hard mixing family and friends too. But that might have to do with the different level of intimacy.
    4w5 sp/sx EII

  3. #3
    Ghost Monkey Soul Vizconde's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2009


    Me too. For one pessimistic/pragmatic reason if all goes hell in a hand basket that there is another group you can rely on. Another reason is I like to act different around different groups of people and its different to stay in character with comingling friends and associates.
    I redact everything I have written or will write on this forum prior to, subsequent with and or after the fact of its writing. For entertainment purposes only and not to be taken seriously nor literally.

    Quote Originally Posted by Edgar View Post
    Spamtar - a strange combination of boorish drunkeness and erudite discussions, or what I call "an Irish academic"

  4. #4
    ornery ornithologist captain curmudgeon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    631 sp


    I rarely end up at friends' planned get-togethers and never plan them myself, but I could imagine the awkwardness. The question is whether or not my apprehensiveness or curiosity would win...I'd say its a draw.

  5. #5


    I've had similar struggles. Ended up throwing a party where some people would up smoking pot and some Christian friends wondered whether they should call the cops. Everyone who had various things in common tended to stick to their little groups anyway, so everything worked out. So on and so forth with other similar stories.

    Getting lots of people together without knowing what they have in common can be pretty nerve-wracking. Structuring a party around a common interest or ideal helps. It's easier if, say, everyone is coming out to salsa dance, play games, discuss personal growth, etc.

    The people who throw parties and invite everyone probably don't overanalyze it like we do.

    Fortunately, most of us are at least somewhat different around different sorts of people, as different aspects of our personalities come out in different situations. I think most people recognize all of this--for example, my religious views don't readily come out during a dance party.

    As a corollary to that, the people you know from various groups have aspects of their personalities than you've probably seen. People have more in common with one another than they think they do; if potential conflict is a worry, it's just a matter of helping them figure out exactly what the common points of interest are--or just allowing them to surface.

  6. #6
    Step into my office. Luv Deluxe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    7w6 sx/sp


    Almost all of my close friends have never met each other, as they all came from different parts of my life. Each of them primarily interacts with some unique aspect of my personality; I have a movie friend, an adventuring/thrill-seeking friend, a philosophical friend, an intelligent/like-humored friend, an artsy friend, etc. Often, when I want to discuss deep matters of the heart, there's only one friend I can go to for a great conversation. If I'm on a mission to ride a rollercoaster while drunk, there's only one friend who'd likely be willing to share that experience. If I want to watch a movie and then analyze it over a drink, there's another friend for that. It's strange, because my friends are like pieces of myself, scattered all over the country - but if I were to have a party and invite all of them, I feel that the majority would dislike each other. They are very different people.

    I've read somewhere that having circles of mutual friends actually helps sustain relationships and reinforce communication, keeping those bonds alive. My experience has actually been that drama flares up more frequently in such groups, especially all-female ones. I prefer one-on-one interaction anyway, so I'm quite content to let my friends live their own, very separate lives.
    Ni > Se > Fe > Ti
    7w6 cp
    so SX it hurts
    Chaotic Good

    ~ Gryffindor on the streets, Slytherin in the sheets ~

Similar Threads

  1. Quotes to Motivate You to *Get To Work*
    By Usehername in forum The Bonfire
    Replies: 42
    Last Post: 09-21-2014, 12:36 PM
  2. Colorful Sayings/Quotes
    By ladypinkington in forum The Bonfire
    Replies: 39
    Last Post: 05-10-2010, 06:28 PM
  3. Words of Wisdom, Inspiring Quotes, etc
    By rivercrow in forum The Fluff Zone
    Replies: 33
    Last Post: 11-21-2008, 06:39 PM
  4. [MBTItm] Quote on Intution
    By heart in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 07-15-2007, 01:28 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO