[ENFP] I HATE being an ENFP

[Sacrophagus]

You hate being an ENFP? If you can't handle all the charm you have, that's a problem that has nothing with ENFPness per se.

Maybe we could use more ENFPs here, but since they value freedom and a colorful bubbly expression, not everyone is going to be able to handle your clashing and inordinately random thoughts. The site might consider the lot of you as spam bots and ban your IP adresses.

It is sad that some of you have to train themselves to fake order, driven to think that there is something wrong with them, and restrain their fountain of ambrosial thoughts to accommodate the views of the majority.

 

[wildmoon]

OP, I hope you feel better about yourself. The truth is that any type can be smart. The MBTI is just a theory, and a flawed one at that. I know plenty of brilliant ENFPs. That guy sounds like he's not worth your time.

 

[Yay]

Maybe he thinks that you lack intelligence, but maybe if he was that intelligent he'd start being more open minded and realize that intelligence comes in different forms. There are different kinds of intelligence. If he can't realize that, he's lacking intellect AND he's lacking socially, so actually you aren't missing out. Honestly you probably have more to contribute than he does. Not only that, but you don't know where his mind was really at when he said that. For all you know he was just saying that to make himself feel better because he also has insecurities and he doesn't know how to handle them. What he said is plain rude. I'd set him straight

 

[CarolineJ]

I have an ENFP boyfriend, soon to be husband. We're totally different on the surface: I'm older, white, successful. He's mixed race, younger, and was very poor when we met. We get a lot of judgment, mostly from S types.

What I love about him? Let me count the ways... He's an original. He's incredibly complex. He has a heart of gold. He's magnetic. He's very liked and loved. He's passionate and romantic. He can dance beautifully. He loves animals like I do. He's amazing with children. He cooks better than anyone I know. He makes beautiful flower arrangements. I know he can protect me physically (Johannesburg is a risky place)--he's tough. He's spontaneous, except with tasks--he gets overwhelmed with too many things to do. He's sensitive to my needs as an introvert. He loves change like I do. He likes trying different things. We have long, deep, rambling conversations. We laugh a lot. He has a great sense of humor although I can't always keep up with his mental leaps. He can't always keep up with my logic. He's helped me accept my body. He reminds me to enjoy the present, to stop and smell the roses. He reaches out for me in his sleep. I usually feel that I've overwhelming others with my complexity, intensity and the range of abilities and interests but he takes me in his stride. He doesn't have my more left-brain intelligence but he amazes me with his insights.

When I say, "I had a dream...", he helps me interpret it. His own dreams are very prophetic. When I start talking to the "dead" person next to him, he doesn't doubt me for a minute. When he shows me his photo of a UFO, I don't mock him. I love how he understands that there's than this physical plane and yet he gets on with everyone. He's so comfortable being his weird and wonderful self, even S types like him. He makes being weird look cool. I don't like being seen as weird or different.

It took me a while to get used to his energetic ups and downs and his inability to travel from A to B in a straight line but I understand him so much better now and see the method in the madness.

Did I mention, he's gorgeous? My SE loves beauty.

So, if you're anything like him, you have a lot to offer the right person. Many types love ENFPs. From what I've seen, your type may be the most desired type of all.

 

[Sacrophagus]

I have an ENFP boyfriend, soon to be husband. We're totally different on the surface: I'm older, white, successful. He's mixed race, younger, and was very poor when we met. We get a lot of judgment, mostly from S types.

What I love about him? Let me count the ways... He's an original. He's incredibly complex. He has a heart of gold. He's magnetic. He's very liked and loved. He's passionate and romantic. He can dance beautifully. He loves animals like I do. He's amazing with children. He cooks better than anyone I know. He makes beautiful flower arrangements. I know he can protect me physically (Johannesburg is a risky place)--he's tough. He's spontaneous, except with tasks--he gets overwhelmed with too many things to do. He's sensitive to my needs as an introvert. He loves change like I do. He likes trying different things. We have long, deep, rambling conversations. We laugh a lot. He has a great sense of humor although I can't always keep up with his mental leaps. He can't always keep up with my logic. He's helped me accept my body. He reminds me to enjoy the present, to stop and smell the roses. He reaches out for me in his sleep. I usually feel that I've overwhelming others with my complexity, intensity and the range of abilities and interests but he takes me in his stride. He doesn't have my more left-brain intelligence but he amazes me with his insights.

When I say, "I had a dream...", he helps me interpret it. His own dreams are very prophetic. When I start talking to the "dead" person next to him, he doesn't doubt me for a minute. When he shows me his photo of a UFO, I don't mock him. I love how he understands that there's than this physical plane and yet he gets on with everyone. He's so comfortable being his weird and wonderful self, even S types like him. He makes being weird look cool. I don't like being seen as weird or different.

It took me a while to get used to his energetic ups and downs and his inability to travel from A to B in a straight line but I understand him so much better now and see the method in the madness.

Did I mention, he's gorgeous? My SE loves beauty.

So, if you're anything like him, you have a lot to offer the right person. Many types love ENFPs. From what I've seen, your type may be the most desired type of all.

Without a doubt.

For some reason, the arresting entropy they bring along to our compulsively ordered system is something we earnestly cannot resist. When we utter the words "You're a mess" to describe them it suddenly doesn't seem like a bad thing at all.

 

[Forever]

Hopefully after 7 years I think the OP doesn’t really mind the issue anymore.

 

[Amberiat]

Seriously, MBTI has nothing to do with intellect, any type can be smart and any type can be dumb, maybe NTs are more inclined to use a logical approach to problems and situations, making them seem smarter while NFs might be more emotional on average which people mistake for lack of intelligence, that being said, any NT can be incredibly irrational at times and any NF can be rational, humans are way too complex to be fully described by a few letters and descriptions. Not to mention the MBTI has flaws just like any other system made by humans and basing your entire existence on it is just asking for trouble.

 

[Avocado]

You hate being an ENFP? If you can't handle all the charm you have, that's a problem that has nothing with ENFPness per se.

Maybe we could use more ENFPs here, but since they value freedom and a colorful bubbly expression, not everyone is going to be able to handle your clashing and inordinately random thoughts. The site might consider the lot of you as spam bots and ban your IP adresses.

It is sad that some of you have to train themselves to fake order, driven to think that there is something wrong with them, and restrain their fountain of ambrosial thoughts to accommodate the views of the majority.

[MENTION=10082]Starry[/MENTION]

 

[Stigmata]

Seriously, MBTI has nothing to do with intellect, any type can be smart and any type can be dumb, maybe NTs are more inclined to use a logical approach to problems and situations, making them seem smarter while NFs might be more emotional on average which people mistake for lack of intelligence, that being said, any NT can be incredibly irrational at times and any NF can be rational, humans are way too complex to be fully described by a few letters and descriptions. Not to mention the MBTI has flaws just like any other system made by humans and basing your entire existence on it is just asking for trouble.

I'm impressed. It's as if you've used the hyperbolic time chamber to cram many years worth of myers-briggs forum experience into the definitive conclusion that awaits as us all despite how tightly some may purse their lips to suckle from the teat type theory in all its various forms.

I congratulate you, though. You got all the knowledge without having to endure any of the flame wars, mod infractions, or unhealthy interpersonal dynamics.

 

[Starry]

[MENTION=10082]Starry[/MENTION]

Sacrophagus is very charming is he not? More amazing to me is that he truly understands the ENFP condition...and appreciates us for all the things society has tried to rid us of since birth. He is trying to say that he loves us for the people we were born to be...not who we are so often pressed and hammered to become. It is people like him that make such a difference for us.

 

[Smilephantomhive]

If you hate being an enfp then you hate being yourself.

 

[Abcdenfp]

I simply dont understand this self loathing that i have witness from several enfps on here. We are ideas in motion.. carriers of the spark of possiblities.
Watching a healthy enfp in action is an awesome thing, they make everything seem possible even if just for a moment. I would never disown my type, and i also know that it is not the only thing that defines me. When we learn to strengthen our weaker functions watch out (same could be said for most types)
irl two of my best friends are enfps and they are forces of nature, other world quirky wonderfulness and successful in a worldly sense.

 

[Stigmata]

I would never disown my type, and i also know that it is not the only thing that defines me. .

You're right -- AbcdIntp just doesn't have that same ring to it.

 

[Lady Lazarus]

I HATE having so many water signs in my astrological chart. Being ENFP isn't as bad as that, if that helps any.

 

[Non_xsense]

I like Enfp they teach me ( in their special way ) how to enjoy the moments of life.

 

[Lord Lavender]

Being an ENFP has it's ups and downs. At the end of the day you have to accept that your MBTI and type don't determine what kind of person you are.

 

[Coriolis]

Being an ENFP has it's ups and downs. At the end of the day you have to accept that your MBTI and type don't determine what kind of person you are.

At the risk of stating the obvious, this is true about any type, though perhaps some types are quicker to recognize and internalize it than others.

 

[Seeker33]

Man i love being ENFP! I make friends all over without even trying really. My life tends to end up being hundreds of awesome adventures and experiences. I have lots of interests and seem to be able to learn anything if i put my mind to it (and dont get distracted by the next shiny experience). I'm quite intelligent and extremely analytical for a feeler too.

I'm just a little... unfocused... sometimes

 

[Dreamer]

If someone were to complain about being a particular type, and complain about the descriptions of that type across the internet (I assume the OP has since moved onto bigger and better things seeing as how old this thread is??) I would first question whether that person has any grasp over who they are to begin with, and if they are completely blind to both their strengths and weaknesses not to be able to go through whatever type description and say "yes" or "no", to elements that don't describe them. And, that's IF we decide the typical type descriptions online are an accurate assessment of a given type, as most "traits" offered, tend to be purely behavioral based and don't offer any context as to the underlying thought processes or motives behind those behaviors.

This sort of thing also confuses me, because I assume, unless you enjoy playing the victim, if you are able to identify personality traits or quirks about yourself that you think can get in the way of realizing your true potential, the personality type isn't holding you back at that point, YOU are. No matter the personality type, there are always ways we can better ourselves and to improve our thinking towards more productive and meaningful ventures. If someone is using their type as an excuse to behave a certain way towards others, then I have no sympathy. It's about being honest with yourself and striving towards what you desire.