[INFJ] What do you do when you're worrying too much about what others think of you?

[Crescent Fresh]

This personally does not happen to me very often anymore, though when I was a teen it was part of my daily life. One day my mother told me as I was setting off on my first day of college, nervous as ever, "nobody cares about you anyway, they are not even going to notice you exist." In a nice way of course, those words were very liberating actually. That has kind of been my philosophy from that point on, because it is so very true. On the face of this planet I am insignificant, and in the eyes of history I am pretty much non-existent, as are the people around me, so why in the world should I be concerned in the slightest with what other people think of me or what I do?

My mother told me something similar actually, and she's an ISFP. She has always told me that: "Do not boder to care how others think of you, because in the end, you'll only end up being burned out if you put too much energy worrying about how others might misjudge you. So it's pointless to worry how others think about you anyways."

 

[CzeCze]

When I find myself caring too much about what other people think to the point it leads me in making decisions and I get anxious - I surrender to it and say, "I'm a flaming dork, everyone knows this, I'm not X, Y, Z enough for these people...EVERYONE HATEZ MEEEEE??!?!??!." Then I sigh out my disappointment, say FUUUUUCK. IT. and do a happy flaming dork dance. Then I am free to be my fabulous freaking self.

That surrender and acceptance do wonders for preoccupation and anxiety. Because I no longer have to worry *IF* these people like me or think X Y Z" because I have taken out the "if" and I have already imagined and accepted the worst possible scenario and I'm over it. Make sense?

Also disappointment is a great teacher and a great motivator. The anger of past disappointment can trump your anxiety over future success. Make sense?

Bah.