[NF] Meaning of Phrase "I really like you a lot."

[Onceajoan]

What do you think it might me when an infp says, "I really like you a lot" after he turns his head to the side. Could it more... or should I just take the statement literally?

What does "I really like you a lot" mean to you?" infps or any other nf. Thanks for your thoughts.

 

[King sns]

What do you think it might me when an infp says, "I really like you a lot" after he turns his head to the side. Could it more... or should I just take the statement literally?

What does "I really like you a lot" mean to you?" infps or any other nf. Thanks for your thoughts.

I'm not an NF, but am having difficulty figuring out what you mean by "turning head to the side"... cocking his head to the side? Looking to the side in one direction or the other? Laying in bed and looking up, but then turning his head towards you? (Who is laying on the side?) Facing eyes down and to the side? Facing eyes up and to the side? Too many things to picture. Also, need to know the rest of the conversation.

Body language says more than words.

 

[Lady_X]

says the se user haha that's great s n s.
i on the other hand would need to take everything i know about our relationship to determine what was meant...it could mean i really like you a lot but... or god can't you see how much i like you!! or i can't act on it because of this or that that we are both aware of but please don't take it personally...etc etc..

 

[Onceajoan]

I'm not an NF, but am having difficulty figuring out what you mean by "turning head to the side"... cocking his head to the side? Looking to the side in one direction or the other? Laying in bed and looking up, but then turning his head towards you? (Who is laying on the side?) Facing eyes down and to the side? Facing eyes up and to the side? Too many things to picture. Also, need to know the rest of the conversation.

Body language says more than words.

Well you can turn your head to the right or left while addressing the person in
front of you. That's what he did. He turned his head to the right then he made this statement.

 

[Rail Tracer]

I would expect the person to at least be facing you when making that statement (and if he was so shy.... then he can face to the side after making the statement.) This is even more so if he was directly in front of you.

Turning his head while making that statement just makes me think that there is something else that is also in his mind. Either that, or he was just...really..really..really...shy and saying that took a bit of courage.

 

[Onceajoan]

Ummm... Well I'm afraid I can't be of too much help in terms of context. He made the statement towards the close of a conversation. I'm not exactly where tho.. There was nothing said right before the comment the he was responding to except silence. I can say that he's never expressed his feelings for me verbally to me before. I think it was difficult. With us it's always reading between the lines. Our relationship has seemed to become much more serious lately - at least that's what I feel when I'm around him. I feel like I've fallen in love with him and so has he fallen for me (but I don't know). Lately I've been missing him and that's what we were talking about. Its difficult for me to see him on a frequent basis and that hurts me. When I told him, he responded by saying he thought it was brave for me to tell him this. It didn't seem brave to me. Rather it seems like the truth. Does a person necessarily associate missing someone with loving them? Is this what he thinks. I was uncomfortable talking to him - squirming and acting nervous because I didn't know what to say (although I had rehearsed it a dozen times). He had a smug, self satisfied look on his face that I've never seen before. I don't know what that meant... I do know that he made the comment some time after this...

Hope this provides context.

 

[KDude]

If I said it, I'd be dying to say more.. It'd be me making some step or feeling out a situation.

 

[Onceajoan]

I would expect the person to at least be facing you when making that statement (and if he was so shy.... then he can face to the side after making the statement.) This is even more so if he was directly in front of you.

Turning his head while making that statement just makes me think that there is something else that is also in his mind. Either that, or he was just...really..really..really...shy and saying that took a bit of courage.

He is pretty shy about talking about feelings. But I also thought that maybe there's something more to the statement - something he's holding back.

 

[Onceajoan]

If I said it, I'd be dying to say more.. It'd be me making some step or feeling out a situation.

You mean you'd say more or try to read more into the exchange? Not sure what you're saying - sorry!

 

[KDude]

You mean you'd say more or try to read more into the exchange? Not sure what you're saying - sorry!

If I felt the urge to say that to someone, it'd entail that they meant a lot. I don't know about this guy, but I don't say things like that casually. But if they weren't very receptive to it, then I might leave it at that.

On another note, if you feel the same way about him, let it be known in one way or another. Don't do that IFJ thing where you go off and ponder in silence too much. ;D

 

[Onceajoan]

On another note, if you feel the same way about him, let it be known in one way or another. Don't do that IFJ thing where you go off and ponder in silence too much. ;D

KDude - I hear you. Thanks!

 

[Such Irony]

What does "I really like you a lot" mean to you?" infps or any other nf. Thanks for your thoughts.

Depends on the context of the situation and the body language used. It could just simply mean "I like you a lot" or it could be a hint that the other person wants a deeper and more romantic relationship.

 

[Onceajoan]

Just what I thought. Thanks SuchIrony. BTW: It's not fair when you do the PUER thing! You must prefer incognito.

Not that this will help illuminate the context or body language, but it was all strange: the mood, the dialogue - the body language less so (I read body language really well). He was acting a bit atypical - very, very cool, very controlled, then he let out a smug smile when I started getting uncomfortable as if he was enjoying seeing me squirm (I sounded like an idiot discussing how I missed him). He seemed to think this was funny (I guess?) It seemed sadistic. But, he's not that kind of person. So it got me wondering - what is he hiding from me? "I really like you a lot" can me just simply mean "I really like you a lot" or something else - "I love you", "I'm attracted to you", "I don't want to hurt your feelings so I'm telling you this..." , "I'm falling for you", "I more than just like you - you're an important part of my life." I don't want to ask him because he's an INFP - and I don't want to push him to reveal his feelings for me until he's ready. Although I don't know exactly what he meant by the phrase, I was glad to hear it. I now know he feels something for me which I had suspected - although it was expressed only nonverbally which is open to even more interpretation. Now the cat's out of the bag, so to speak.

 

[King sns]

Ummm... Well I'm afraid I can't be of too much help in terms of context. He made the statement towards the close of a conversation. I'm not exactly where tho.. There was nothing said right before the comment the he was responding to except silence. I can say that he's never expressed his feelings for me verbally to me before. I think it was difficult. With us it's always reading between the lines. Our relationship has seemed to become much more serious lately - at least that's what I feel when I'm around him. I feel like I've fallen in love with him and so has he fallen for me (but I don't know). Lately I've been missing him and that's what we were talking about. Its difficult for me to see him on a frequent basis and that hurts me. When I told him, he responded by saying he thought it was brave for me to tell him this. It didn't seem brave to me. Rather it seems like the truth. Does a person necessarily associate missing someone with loving them? Is this what he thinks. I was uncomfortable talking to him - squirming and acting nervous because I didn't know what to say (although I had rehearsed it a dozen times). He had a smug, self satisfied look on his face that I've never seen before. I don't know what that meant... I do know that he made the comment some time after this...

Hope this provides context.

Unfortunately, for me, there's no context
I guess I'd almost have to see him to know what you're saying.

HOWEVER, (Good news)
Without further descriptors, I'd assume that he meant what he said...

Also,
sooo cute

 

[skylights]

If I felt the urge to say that to someone, it'd entail that they meant a lot. I don't know about this guy, but I don't say things like that casually. But if they weren't very receptive to it, then I might leave it at that.

On another note, if you feel the same way about him, let it be known in one way or another. Don't do that IFJ thing where you go off and ponder in silence too much. ;D

 

[Santosha]

says the se user haha that's great s n s.
i on the other hand would need to take everything i know about our relationship to determine what was meant...it could mean i really like you a lot but... or god can't you see how much i like you!! or i can't act on it because of this or that that we are both aware of but please don't take it personally...etc etc..

Thats funny. Same exact thoughts and hypotheticals on this one Lady X. =D

 

[King sns]

Ummm... Well I'm afraid I can't be of too much help in terms of context. He made the statement towards the close of a conversation. I'm not exactly where tho.. There was nothing said right before the comment the he was responding to except silence. I can say that he's never expressed his feelings for me verbally to me before. I think it was difficult. With us it's always reading between the lines. Our relationship has seemed to become much more serious lately - at least that's what I feel when I'm around him. I feel like I've fallen in love with him and so has he fallen for me (but I don't know). Lately I've been missing him and that's what we were talking about. Its difficult for me to see him on a frequent basis and that hurts me. When I told him, he responded by saying he thought it was brave for me to tell him this. It didn't seem brave to me. Rather it seems like the truth. Does a person necessarily associate missing someone with loving them? Is this what he thinks. I was uncomfortable talking to him - squirming and acting nervous because I didn't know what to say (although I had rehearsed it a dozen times). He had a smug, self satisfied look on his face that I've never seen before. I don't know what that meant... I do know that he made the comment some time after this...

Hope this provides context.

So, you've known him for a while, and he's saying this now? What's the status of your current relationship? Somehow this is sounding pretty promising.

 

[KDude]

Just what I thought. Thanks SuchIrony. BTW: It's not fair when you do the PUER thing! You must prefer incognito.

Not that this will help illuminate the context or body language, but it was all strange: the mood, the dialogue - the body language less so (I read body language really well). He was acting a bit atypical - very, very cool, very controlled, then he let out a smug smile when I started getting uncomfortable as if he was enjoying seeing me squirm (I sounded like an idiot discussing how I missed him). He seemed to think this was funny (I guess?) It seemed sadistic. But, he's not that kind of person. So it got me wondering - what is he hiding from me? "I really like you a lot" can me just simply mean "I really like you a lot" or something else - "I love you", "I'm attracted to you", "I don't want to hurt your feelings so I'm telling you this..." , "I'm falling for you", "I more than just like you - you're an important part of my life." I don't want to ask him because he's an INFP - and I don't want to push him to reveal his feelings for me until he's ready. Although I don't know exactly what he meant by the phrase, I was glad to hear it. I now know he feels something for me which I had suspected - although it was expressed only nonverbally which is open to even more interpretation. Now the cat's out of the bag, so to speak.

Personally, I don't think you should be worried about his feelings too much. I say this with hestitation (because I can't speak for everyone), but I resent the type of descriptions of INFPs out there a little bit (like parts in this one) that make them reserved and guarded in a way like they need to be coddled. He's a grown guy, not a 4 year old. Just have fun. It sounds like he's ready enough, and trying to be as open at the moment as he can. INFPs are spontaneous (more than you perhaps), but they're not always going to be immediately/obviously forward or opportunistic the way Se is. I mean, I can be myself, but it's second nature to me.. I only do it because people expect it. But I'd rather just meet someone halfway, instead of having to push and be the one responsible for getting everything out in the air.

 

[A window to the soul]

I think it means he's hanging out on a limb. Did you reciprocate?

 

[Onceajoan]

I think it means he's hanging out on a limb. Did you reciprocate?

Haha! I could take that one or two ways. Yeah, I think he's hanging out in both ways.

Thanks everyone for responding - what I think I got out of it is just relax and go with the flow - the infp way, don't overintepret/overanalyze his words ( who knows exactly what he means - the fact he said anything is big), I also could have said something in return to reassure him (unfortunately, I tend to freeze in these situations). Oh well, there's always next time.