[ENFP] How to spot an ENFP a mile off

[Cygnus]

"Always comfortable" might be a better choice of words. True happiness goes much deeper than giggling once in a while. That's extroversion + childishness. "Happy" means that, overall, you're satisfied with your life and the choices you made and that you feel you've gone as far as you possibly can or need to.


But it's really fucking stupid to pidgeonhole this type into a polyanna role. Blegh. No one behaves like that. If anything, that's an idealization from an FJ point of view, highlighting all this type's good traits in its prime while ignoring the hellscapes of impulsivity that characterize the rest of its life.
From his experience, this guy says that ENFPs are often exceptionally aggressive as a form of compensation.

Ne-doms are known for their lethargy and tendencies to be distracted. That doesn't exactly put a person in his prime. And Fi doesn't make you automatically contented either. Fi/Te is like a flame trying to pierce into the cold darkness, Fe/Ti is like a grey cave trying to suck in all the light. If the world's welcoming, of course you'll reciprocate. If not, you'll go full edgeshit, collapsing into your own personal spiral of immediate pleasures that cripple you in the long run.

One could just as easily say INTJs are the happiest because they're allegedly the most mature. I'd kill to be that.

 

[HongDou]

Yeah...I'm wondering how many "ENFPs" these people are spotting are actually ExFJs. Playing the cute and bubbly card is like their forte. Most of the time when people call me cute or "precious" or something along those lines it's usually when I'm talking 100% seriously and it kind of throws me off.

I've talked about this with [MENTION=10082]Starry[/MENTION] a lot. Being called cute and silly and everything is fine...but after a while you realize you're stuck in a cycle of being looked down upon and not taken seriously. I feel like the people who enjoy showing off their quirks are the ones who don't actually suffer because of them...or aren't continuously reprimanded for them.

Edit: I just realized this entire post is paradoxical in combination with my avatar. Listen, I just like summer vibes okay?

 

[Cygnus]

I feel like the people who enjoy showing off their quirks are the ones who don't actually suffer because of them...or aren't continuously reprimanded for them.

Please engrave that onto a plaque and eBay it to me.

 

[Starry]

How do you NOT spot an ENFP a mile off?! They are the easiest to spot by far. They're smiling, flirtatious, sometimes excited, silly, happy, socially confident, and walk proudly. When I see an ENFP, everything I see screams ENFP.

One of the things I appreciate about ceecee and highlander is they recognize and acknowledge the INTJs attraction to the ExFJ.

Yeah...I'm wondering how many "ENFPs" these people are spotting are actually ExFJs. Playing the cute and bubbly card is like their forte. Most of the time when people call me cute or "precious" or something along those lines it's usually when I'm talking 100% seriously and it kind of throws me off.

I've talked about this with [MENTION=10082]Starry[/MENTION] a lot. Being called cute and silly and everything is fine...but after a while you realize you're stuck in a cycle of being looked down upon and not taken seriously. I feel like the people who enjoy showing off their quirks are the ones who don't actually suffer because of them...or aren't continuously reprimanded for them.

Edit: I just realized this entire post is paradoxical in combination with my avatar. Listen, I just like summer vibes okay?

I didn't include @senza's posts at this time because I was actually working against the significant point she was attempting to make there heh *nervous*


Positive Outlook is a bitch isn't it? Which of these two equations produces someone that is socially confident and walks proudly... and which produces an individual constantly in social doubt and crashing into shit? Fe + e2 or Ne + e7? And no I don't give a shit we've got the stereotype thread in progress.

Oh I need to go pick up dinner...

 

[five sounds]

haha social doubt and crashing into shit sounds more like the being an ENFP that I know and love

 

[Starry]

ENFP's are happy almost all the time as far as I've seen. They only get unhappy if something really bad happens. Then before too long they're happy again. I know I'm right and you're wrong. You can't tell me that I haven't seen what I've seen.

Also, the fact that I said that ENFP's are generally happy is not the same thing as saying that ENFP's have limited emotional range. You fucking put those words in my mouth. I never said that, nor did I think such a thing.
So don't accuse me of something that I didn't say. I hate it when people put words in my mouth just so they can tell me I'm terribly wrong about something. I'm sure that ENFP feel just as wide a range of emotions as other people, but most of the time they're happy.

Lastly, you're just gratuitously nitpicking my by telling me I can't generalize a type. MBTI is all about generalizing types. I'm just going to put you on my ignore list because you're not worth dealing with and you insult my intelligence.

TSDesigner... First, I like me a good counterphobic INTJ/IStP hybrid. Gets the blood pumpin which is especially useful now as we head into the cold season. Secondly, no one here is saying an INTJ has been wrong...good god NO! (What do you take us for? It has to be "crack addicts" right? That's the only thing I can think of. ) I promise you...we all know that never occurs.

I do not relate to your description of the ENFP and I don't know a lot of ENFPs that would. In my mind your description is more fitting for what I know of the ESFJ 2 which in many ways fits the general description of the ENFP better than an actual ENFP. <-Still haven't proclaimed an INTJ wrong though... why? Because I can't rule out that's your interpretation of actual ENFP behavior relative to your perspective and experience.

If you're dealing in ENFPs instead of ESFJs though...here's what you must understand and this is what you were unable to hear senza fully articulate because you thought she was trying to say an INTJ might be wrong about something. A "happy all the time ENFP" is a sick ENFP. In other words ENFPs have powerful emotions that run the gauntlet of the full-spectrum in overlap. Because of this... many ENFPs either learned or were taught via reinforcement not to let that kind of crazy show in a world of responsibility and tax forms...but rather...just like a Calgon bath...allow the distraction of Ne to whisk them away to the land of "perpetual tomorrow" where no one need be sad because it doesn't exist.

When you love the happy and not the insanity...you are actually loving the sickness (and I'd go find me a nice, sane ESFJ as 2 rights makes an even more awesome, big, secure right )

 

[Cygnus]

I'm just going to put you on my ignore list because you're not worth dealing with and you insult my intelligence.

Nominated for "most arrogant post of the week."


Cry harder.

 

[chubber]

It's really damn hard to spot one, because they are rare and we don't run in the same social circles. Fearful, sometimes because they judge incorrectly.

 

[Starry]

Fearful, sometimes because they judge incorrectly.

I would need an example of this chubber. This *may* be something you're merely imagining.

 

[five sounds]

*silly switch (it's an introvert...no it's an extrovert!)

*morals out of seemingly nowhere (we're chill till we're not)

*a penchant for the bizarre, overlooked, tossed aside

*a knack for adjusting to their conversation partner(s) - both energetically and linguistically

 

[Captain_Invincible]

Do they ever run out of energy?

Can you understand them?

Do they ever get depressed?

Are they an idea machine?

Could you kill them, but refrain from doing so because they're so loveable?

 

[Doctor Cringelord]

A flock of EFPs in their natural habitat.

 

[Boogie man]

Look for the pink hair.

...
Btw, [MENTION=7480]TSDesigner[/MENTION] , you're hilarious. Have you ever thought of doing stand-up?

That is.. unless you were being serious.. You're confusing me.

 

[Dreamer]

I would need an example of this chubber. This *may* be something you're merely imagining.

The times I misread someone or judge inaccurately is when I ignore my intuition or feeling about a situation, and try to analyze it and come objectively at it instead. I don't know why I allow myself to do this since it's usually the only times my intuition about people gets me into hot water I suppose it's the tendency of the ENFP personality to look on the bright side and see the best in people, that I then overlook their flaws and my intuition??

 

[Julius_Van_Der_Beak]

The times I misread someone or judge inaccurately is when I ignore my intuition or feeling about a situation, and try to analyze it and come objectively at it instead. I don't know why I allow myself to do this since it's usually the only times my intuition about people gets me into hot water I suppose it's the tendency of the ENFP personality to look on the bright side and see the best in people, that I then overlook their flaws and my intuition??

I'm not an ENFP, but if it's ok for me to post in this thread, I usually find that it's a good idea to trust my gut about social situations.

 

[Dreamer]

*silly switch (it's an introvert...no it's an extrovert!)

*morals out of seemingly nowhere (we're chill till we're not)

*a penchant for the bizarre, overlooked, tossed aside

*a knack for adjusting to their conversation partner(s) - both energetically and linguistically

All so true. These points should be pushed to the front of the thread and hung where everyone can see them. "How to know you're talking to an ENFP". I'm totally chill until someone crosses that moral red line in my head, then I almost always cast some negative light in my mind about them. Though, I usually give people second chances to redeem themselves depending on how severely they crossed that line. Problem is, no one ever knows where that line is because I never talk about my values haha.

And that last one, it's so funny but true! I find myself changing up my dialogue, slang, and even way I analyze things when I'm around different people. So crazy.

 

[Dreamer]

I'm not an ENFP, but if it's ok for me to post in this thread, I usually find that it's a good idea to trust my gut about social situations.

Ya, that's what I've been finding to be true. I have no doubt that part of the desire to be more objective and logical about things comes from our culture's strong penchant for it, and therefore has me tossing aside my "butterflyery" intuition, when really, I should be listening to it more.

 

[Hapyniss]

The times I misread someone or judge inaccurately is when I ignore my intuition or feeling about a situation, and try to analyze it and come objectively at it instead. I don't know why I allow myself to do this since it's usually the only times my intuition about people gets me into hot water I suppose it's the tendency of the ENFP personality to look on the bright side and see the best in people, that I then overlook their flaws and my intuition??

Do you think this may be because our thinking function is weaker than our feeling function? Perhaps it is the strength of the feeling function with our intuition that helps us to accurate interpret an others motives. I have found this to be extremely accurate in my life as well. When I go inside myself and observe and intuit, I nail it. But when I think about it and roll thoughts, my emotions only run to extremes and cause me confusion. Do you find any of this to happen? That's why I remain firmly in the present moment and have learned to be ok with flying by the seat of my pants! Literally.

 

[Dreamer]

Do you think this may be because our thinking function is weaker than our feeling function? Perhaps it is the strength of the feeling function with our intuition that helps us to accurate interpret an others motives. I have found this to be extremely accurate in my life as well. When I go inside myself and observe and intuit, I nail it. But when I think about it and roll thoughts, my emotions only run to extremes and cause me confusion. Do you find any of this to happen? That's why I remain firmly in the present moment and have learned to be ok with flying by the seat of my pants! Literally.

Ya, I wouldn't be surprised. I feel my Te is pretty well developed since I know without an organized life and at least some structure, my dreams end up stagnant and go nowhere, and order is definitely appreciated, but perhaps it's just the combination of our intuition/feeling, and the thinking function and not playing well with one another? I can certainly get confused over my feeling over someone and picking up if they have some ulterior motives if I stew on it for too long. It's like the thinking function is trying to find facts and evidence somewhere in my intuition/feeling duo, and it's just not there. Not sure, just guesses.

 

[five sounds]

Do you think this may be because our thinking function is weaker than our feeling function? Perhaps it is the strength of the feeling function with our intuition that helps us to accurate interpret an others motives. I have found this to be extremely accurate in my life as well. When I go inside myself and observe and intuit, I nail it. But when I think about it and roll thoughts, my emotions only run to extremes and cause me confusion. Do you find any of this to happen? That's why I remain firmly in the present moment and have learned to be ok with flying by the seat of my pants! Literally.

I think it's because our INTUITION is stronger than our feeling tbh. ENFPs try really hard to see the good in people and connect with them. And with Ne so limitless, I think we can build pretty divergent stories, attending to and connecting the things we want to see.