[NF] Which NF type is most likely to get butthurt?

[Arclight]

I'm sorry, the INFJs I know are cold on the outside. They never show how they feel. INFPs are a bit like that in my experience. They're always this calm and hamronious on the outside, but once in a blue moon, when they had too much, they start crying. INFJs never cry, or at least not with other people around them.

I almost drowned in the tears of an INFJ.. true story..

 

[Lady_X]

i would say infj, enfj, infp, enfp i think ni + fe is more likely than ne + fi

 

[Lady_X]

We're cold on the outside? Maybe I'm a weird INFJ, but one of the things I dislike about myself is how much people can see emotion on my face even when I would like to hide it (so that it can be processed, or addressed at a more suitable time, or so that others can't see when they've hurt me).

I think we often have a "nice" blandish exterior for people we don't know very well, but if we are upset, parties who are interested would be able to tell. I think I mostly react to people who are close to me who hurt me. I may feel distressed by people who aren't close, but if they are not worth of engaging in conflict with (either unavoidable people in my life or those who matter the world to me), I probably would feel annoyance more than hurt.

i don't find infjs at all cold...i find that they may wish to not show their sensitivity but it permeates my whole being probably more than any other type.

 

[Lady_X]

Agreed. And here I quote Oscar Wilde, whom articulated my personal stance on this issue quite well:



In response to the OP: I have offended more ENFP's than I can count. The other three types not so much. Does this mean ENFP's are more likely to get butthurt? Maybe, but probably not, given the HUGE sample size of ENFP's I know. For some reason I'm surrounded by ENFP's (I know at least 10 IRL), while I only know 1 INFP, 2 INFJ's, and 2 ENFJ's IRL. The more people I know of a specific type the more likely I am to encounter with disagreements with them, I guess.

i think ti can have the potential to hurt enfps more than most functions...it's like stripping the emotionality or human element which is everything we stand for out of the equation...not always of course but in some cases...so it makes sense to me that that is your experience.

 

[prplchknz]

We're cold on the outside? Maybe I'm a weird INFJ, but one of the things I dislike about myself is how much people can see emotion on my face even when I would like to hide it (so that it can be processed, or addressed at a more suitable time, or so that others can't see when they've hurt me).

I think we often have a "nice" blandish exterior for people we don't know very well, but if we are upset, parties who are interested would be able to tell. I think I mostly react to people who are close to me who hurt me. I may feel distressed by people who aren't close, but if they are not worth of engaging in conflict with (either unavoidable people in my life or those who matter the world to me), I probably would feel annoyance more than hurt.

I have the opposite problem people can't usually tell when i'm upset.

 

[Siúil a Rúin]

Extroverts are probably more likely to communicate to others what they are feeling, but that doesn't mean they are more hurt. My own impression is that there isn't a category that is more sensitive, but just sensitive to different sorts of things. The idea of injustice can be framed a lot of different ways: suffering, falsehood, unfairness, etc. There are ways to frame it that can get a T going just as surely as an F, or any type.

There have been times that I will try to mirror back the style of language someone uses. If they use a harsh style, I'll try that in response to see their reaction. With other people I will stay calm and bring their energy level down. It depends on how far into their aggression they are. I don't think I would describe that as being hurt on my part. Sometimes I have been frustrated and try to show someone what they are saying by letting them hear it back by imitating their style, or in some cases literally reading back their own words.

I have a kind of sensitivity, but it isn't what people generally assume it to be. Generally it is harder to offend me than the average person. I don't know if that applies to other INFJs or INFPs, or the extraverted NFs. I just don't think NFs are particularly more sensitive than others. It's just a label.

 

[mochajava]

Butthurt makes my mind go to very dirty places... I can't say I like the term, but I do get the appeal.

Also, when do annoyances come from UN-perceived insults or injustices? If you don't perceive it, you can't be hurt by it, right?

One more question - is there an event that motivated the thread? What did you vote, EW?

 

[Moiety]

Agreed. And here I quote Oscar Wilde, whom articulated my personal stance on this issue quite well:



In response to the OP: I have offended more ENFP's than I can count. The other three types not so much. Does this mean ENFP's are more likely to get butthurt? Maybe, but probably not, given the HUGE sample size of ENFP's I know. For some reason I'm surrounded by ENFP's (I know at least 10 IRL), while I only know 1 INFP, 2 INFJ's, and 2 ENFJ's IRL. The more people I know of a specific type the more likely I am to encounter with disagreements with them, I guess.

The only thing that really offends me is when I can see bad intentions behind someone's actions. Brute reason is just a tool.

 

[Queen Kat]

I almost drowned in the tears of an INFJ.. true story..

Really? Mine never cry. When they're sad, they always lock themselves up in a public toilet with a bottle of vodka and a ton of aspirines, waiting to be rescued.

 

[Fidelia]

You've got to be pretty close to them for them to let you see them cry. Even then it's more of an involuntary thing than a "I just trust you so much I'm going to cry in front of you". I think we're more compelled to be authentically ourselves around the people we have strong feelings towards. On the other hand, I think some INFJs do have a tendancy to just close themselves off to people, especially if they are in a bad space.

In my experience ENFPs tend to get butthurt more. As I think about it though, I don't really think there's an objective measure of butthurtness - it's more like a chemical reaction depending on what two ingredients are mixed together.

 

[Lady_X]

^^^ makes sense and i should clarify that the way i meant it was that the infjs i know seem extremely sensitive...i didn't mean it in a bad way but maybe i don't really get the full meaning of the term.

 

[Forever_Jung]

Good lord, an 8.7 on the butthurt-ometer! He's really upset now!

 

[animenagai]

Hey, I'm willing to say that I get butthurt. Esoteric's right though, I can take a joke, so if other NF's get butthurt over little jabs, I guess I'm not as sensitive in comparison. I dunno really, all the other NF's can be so private. You would think that ENFP's aren't the only ones so open with their emotions.

 

[OrangeAppled]

As I've expressed in the past, I am not a fan of this term; why does someone else get to judge what is legitimate for you to be upset about? But I know this is a joke thread....so I'll play along.

I vote the N-doms of the NFs. More likely to read into things, IMO. My real life experience is that ENFPs get pouty easily, but then get over it relatively quickly; and INFJs blow up out of nowhere & hold some ridiculous grudge for years, often over something they've done themselves (can dish it out, but not take it). I consider that the most "butthurt"; they set the tone, after all....

INFPs get really, really quiet when hurt, and if it's noted, then people often don't know why & tend to assume it is something more frivolous than it really is (which may seem "butthurt" to them). If an INFP snaps back, there's a greater chance they think they are playing your game, not necessarily hurt (NTs aren't the only sardonic ones...). Sometimes people see hostility when it's just a passionate interest in a topic; NPs like to consider different perspectives indepth, and may even play devil's advocate with people.

 

[scantilyclad]

I admit that I occasionally get butthurt. Butt some things just really hurt.

 

[Thalassa]

Based on my own personal experiences I voted ENFP. Also, I would say NTs are more sensitive than NFs and get butthurt way more easily.
To hurt an NF you actually need to violate some ethic or code that a lot of thought and consideration went into.
NT's get hurt because you simply don't agree with them and thus their fragile little egos bleed all over the place.

JMHO

I'm gonna agree with this. NTs have a coniption fit if you trample their ego. Either that, or they get all huffy and take their toys away and don't want to play with you anymore.

I've been accused of being "butthurt" on this forum when I was just trying to have a discussion, and got annoyed that the person couldn't seem to actually defend their position.

I do get butthurt sometimes, though. But I think anyone who actually is offended by the word "butthurt" is more likely to get butthurt, no matter what their type is.

 

[Thalassa]

My real life experience is that ENFPs get pouty easily, but then get over it relatively quickly

This is very, very true. I am exactly like this.

 

[Lady_X]

^^yeah me too...very quick to say HEY WTF!? and then...oh...okay...

 

[sleepy]

Es I guess. I imagine introverts to be less fragile as identity comes from within.

 

[Esoteric Wench]

In my experience ENFPs tend to get butthurt more. As I think about it though, I don't really think there's an objective measure of butthurtness - it's more like a chemical reaction depending on what two ingredients are mixed together.

LOL! Fidelia said BUTTHURTNESS. This pleases me very much.