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[ENFP] ENFPs- hiding part of yourself.

angelhair45

New member
Joined
Jun 15, 2010
Messages
307
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
7w6
Lots a talk lately on how we ENFPs feel the need to hide part of ourselves as a defense mechanism... I just wanted to say, you don't HAVE to. You can stop hiding yourself and start showing it to people. It really is liberating once you just say fuck it, and start being you even if people aren't sure how to take it.

Maybe if we ENFPs stopped hiding ourselves so much people would get more "used" to us. I guess what I'm saying right now, it seems like it's a vicious cycle for many and maybe we should attempt to stop the cycle by being authentic regardless of what others think or say....

or am I just being a super idealist here?
 

You

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Jun 8, 2010
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2,124
MBTI Type
entp
Enneagram
7w8
That's what I do.
 

alcea rosea

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Joined
Nov 11, 2007
Messages
3,658
MBTI Type
ENFP
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7w6
You are quite idealist, but why not?
Probably a lot easier said than done. ;)
 

angelhair45

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Jun 15, 2010
Messages
307
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
7w6
That's what I do.

I do too, but it took me a while to become this way. I learned to hide "me" over time, and I think it's shit! We shouldn't have to adapt in that way...

I'd love it if other ENFPs could feel more free to be themselves...
 

Moiety

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Aug 3, 2008
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5,996
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ISFJ
I'm not sure I know what you are referring to. Could you give me a concrete example?
 

tortoise

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Aug 25, 2010
Messages
161
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ENFP
I learnt to hide 'me' as a schoolboy, except with a very small group of friends. Too much ridicule comes from small children.

I was always interested in heaps more things than the other boys, more than just football and action men and comics. I liked photography, trains, planes, coins, stamps, heraldry, history, foreign languages, looking for things on the beach, travelling around (when I could talk my mum into driving me), radios, electronics, clocks, astronomy, dinosaurs, tennis, biking. I spent hours at the library devouring books (children's and adults). I spent hours practicing my tennis against a wall. Everything I was interested in, I wanted to max out my knowledge and skill. I could never seem to find friends who were interested in doing anything to the same level of depth as me -- it was very frustrating.

I wanted to do and talk about all kinds of things with the other kids but no-one else was interested. I learnt to just talk about and do the limited range things that most of them talked about but I felt lonely -- I longed for other kids to be on my wavelength.

I think I would have been happier if I had been very introverted or had Asperger's Syndrome (and therefore unaware) but it was painful wanting to have friends that understood me but finding that nobody really shared my enthusiasm for things.
 

Devil Flamingo

Kultainen Kuningas
Joined
Sep 2, 2010
Messages
148
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
I don't hide most of the important things, I don't think. A few I do, because I don't feel the need to let anyone know, but most of the time, I don't really hide things, although I don't go around showcasing them either, like my sexuality for example. Sure, I'm gay, but I don't feel the need to mention it or show it; unless asked, or the topic comes up, I don't really care. Which is why it confuses me when some people go, "Why didn't you tell me you were gay, omg?" because it's like... "I figured you wouldn't care? Why didn't YOU tell me you were straight? XD" Of course, when I'm super-excited about something (P O K E M O N Z !) I must let everyone know and to hell with it, lolo. :smile:

But yeah, I'm not as secretive as perhaps other ENFPs are, or at least I don't hide as much, idk.
 

SillySapienne

`~~Philosoflying~~`
Joined
Jan 14, 2008
Messages
9,801
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4w5
As an ENFP 4w5 I tend to hide a lot of myself, my real self, i.e. the good/bad/crazy/deep self inside, buried deep beneath the surface.

I think I know why.

There are some who allow me to be me, but most people implicitly force me to silence my spirit.

tis sad, tis true, tis life.
 

ubee0173

New member
Joined
Sep 9, 2010
Messages
112
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enfp
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7
i used to do that but then... i stopped. fuck whoever wants to keep your spirit down- they are just bitter because they have no spirit!
 

ubee0173

New member
Joined
Sep 9, 2010
Messages
112
MBTI Type
enfp
Enneagram
7
Lots a talk lately on how we ENFPs feel the need to hide part of ourselves as a defense mechanism... I just wanted to say, you don't HAVE to. You can stop hiding yourself and start showing it to people. It really is liberating once you just say fuck it, and start being you even if people aren't sure how to take it.

Maybe if we ENFPs stopped hiding ourselves so much people would get more "used" to us. I guess what I'm saying right now, it seems like it's a vicious cycle for many and maybe we should attempt to stop the cycle by being authentic regardless of what others think or say....

or am I just being a super idealist here?

let our revolution begin!!!!:solidarity:

you know if we all did that we would just take over the world in a spn of 20 minutes, right?
 
Last edited:

tortoise

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Aug 25, 2010
Messages
161
MBTI Type
ENFP
let our revolution begin!!!!:solidarity:

you know if we all did that we would just take over the world in a spn of 20 minutes, right?

:solidarity:

Yeah, we'd take over the world in 20 mins, then get bored and go off and do something else.
 

tortoise

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Aug 25, 2010
Messages
161
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ENFP
I wonder how many real revolutionaries actually WERE ENFPs? Quite a few of those who would man the barricades would turn out to be lousy at running the country after it was all over. The passionate, freedom-lovings ones always seemed to lose out to the cold, calculating dictatorial ones.
 

skylights

i love
Joined
Jul 6, 2010
Messages
7,756
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
:solidarity:

Yeah, we'd take over the world in 20 mins, then get bored and go off and do something else.

:solidarity:

this is so true.

i know i've talked often about my theory that ENFP hides breadth, but it's really true for me. i'm not particularly so secretive as i simply don't let on. like i know when my NFJ bff is hiding something because it's kind of obvious that the currents run way deeper than what she's letting on. and that's in part because i know her so well, but also in part because she wants me to know there's something i don't know. whereas with me, i'm shit at personal secrets, but there are some things i just don't bother letting on.

can i name all the original pokemon? depressingly, i probably can. and how many people in the world know this? maybe 2, before i shared it with you all. it's not really a secret though. it's just not all that important. i can talk about plenty of random shit, like naming all the zodiac signs or all the month birthstones and all the sephirot too, but most people really don't care, lol. but if someone does, then i'll talk about it. sometimes it's just easier to not talk about stuff others don't like. i have enough interests that it's pretty easy to just find something else to talk about.

i agree that it's way more fun to open up but i also really agree with whoever mentioned easier said than done. the problem is that a lot of people see things as being mutually exclusive, when they are really not. and they will judge you based on those things. like if i like quantum physics, i can't be a good artist. or that it's undignified to sit on the floor. the amount of disdainful looks i got when explaining that i was trying to decide between a Lit or Marine Science or Graphic Arts major was ridiculous. of course i ask well why the freaking hell not, but others just don't see it that way...

:shrug:
 

mmhmm

meinmeinmein!
Joined
Jul 6, 2010
Messages
2,280
i don't think of it as hiding.
certain people are better for certain topics.
i've come to find that very few enjoy breadth anyway.
most are just waiting for their turn to speak.
 

Chloe

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May 1, 2009
Messages
2,196
love this thread.. relate to most things

Revolution is needed!!

maybe everyone should do something, on the same day, in his life.... ?? :D
 

Vamp

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Jul 2, 2010
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579
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ENFP
I hide the part of myself that doesn't want to put out for free. So, I stay home.
 
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