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[INFJ] Hate an INFJ? Tell us why!

INFJs are...

  • Awesome!

    Votes: 56 65.9%
  • okay I guess...whats so special about them...?

    Votes: 29 34.1%

  • Total voters
    85

Galaxy Gazer

New member
Joined
Dec 27, 2015
Messages
941
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
Ni doms are independent types though (yeah the F one wants to make people agree with them) but they really distinguish themselves from a group. I don't think it's likely they all chill as one flock. I always use the analogy of Ni doms being beta fish. I had some really rough experiences with other Ni doms (I see one out of years maybe I'm unlucky but yeah)



That doesn't make sense just because one or two types is the most common result does not make it authentic.
What about the other 14 types? That should raise awareness rather than lessen it.

Do you think NJ and NP types make pop psychology tests exclusively? So you think NJ and NP types are the only type to become novelists? I'm saying those people are mistyped maybe not all of them but a lot of them.

The word choice. Are you introverted or extroverted (introverted is kind of a trend right now) introvert check.
Are you imaginative or realistic? Um of course I'm special Intuitive check. (Everyone believes they're smarter than everyone else)
Are you compassionate? um feeling because I'm not some hard cold ass icy bitch. Feeling check.
Are you disorganized? No I'm not some messy slob. I got my shit together. Judging check.

Tl;dr MBTI has poor word choice.

The questions on an MBTI test don't look anything like that, though. They're based on specific behaviors, thoughts, and motivations.

Also, I've had several classes where we took the test, and there were one or two INxx's at most. Introverted intuitives are the most likely to be a part of this community because introverts tend to prefer socializing on the internet over irl, and intuitives usually prefer depth and theory over facts and everyday topics. Feelers might also be more likely than thinkers to be into MBTI because the test is technically unscientific.

And honestly, I don't think people have any sort of intuitive bias while taking the test. Well, unless they're intuitive :') Most of the sensors that I know are annoyed by "unrealistic dreamers" and the like.
 

JayMakaveli

New member
Joined
Aug 19, 2016
Messages
6
MBTI Type
ENFP
I hate that I love you guys [emoji35]❤️


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
 

ithurt

New member
Joined
Mar 3, 2008
Messages
25
MBTI Type
INFP
Ok..well the things that bug me the most are:

* passive-aggressive, especially in a snipy way. I actually use it myself when I get defensive with someone I feel uncomfortable with, but I very much try to avoid it as I find it to be the equivalent to cutting someone with a scalpel, just without the anaesthetics.

* The high-and-mighty thing. I get that that's Ni for ya, and I love Ni normally, but there's something about the NiFe combo that just irks me. It's that whole 'This is the way it is/should be and you're an idiot for not seeing it or unworthy for not living up to that standard'. I know INTJs are prone to the same thing especially when it comes to work standards, but somehow I can smile better at that (I'm allergic to guilttripping Fe, so that might be it)

* The martyr-thing. The 'Woe, me, I'm so tough for bearing this burden while nobody cares.' Not everyone is gifted in seeing that you need help. You have a mouth, you're not a child, ASK! Do NOT guilttrip.

* Judgemental. Someone who doesn't live up to your standards and has a different pov somehow has to prove their worth to you 10 times before you'll even consider them potentially interesting, or so it feels, at times.


Note: I'm aware that due to my own perspective and my limited sample pool of INFJs, this is bound to be somewhat subjective and biased. And it clearly mostly applies to the more..immature ones still. Hope this was what you were looking for :)

Your post is exactly how I see it. I don't want to hate infjs...like actively hating someone is freaky, but they can get under my skin, and it annoys me to admit it. They just express themselves as if they sincerely yet somewhat unconsciously believe they are walking Jesuses. And I don't mean like angelic Jesuses. Just Jesus level worthiness for good or for bad. They will act like they wanna know you, even like you. Then the bubble bursts and you're like wait, that was just to get information out of you. Then you're realize they go solo, and wanna discard you. Great. So you adjust to that new impression of "needs no one", then you discover that they're butt hurt anyways. Oh wait they're all that shit yet sensitive like any other human being, even moreso. It's kind of maddening. It would be easiest to deal with blindly. Like those people that are oblivious to feelings....they wouldn't even notice the seething and the moral offense infjs take to everything.

Oh one more... if you ever do a wrong lol FORGET IT. You've become Satan and must suffer. And since all humans do wrong, well good luck if you've got feelings for any infj. Because human being=full of flaws and I'm sorry but infj has the hardest time of all types forgiving flaws. But they say "no I am honest with my flaws and everyone has flaws and true love is to accept even with flaws, etc" but that's just words. The actuality is infj seethes at every perceived moral failing. And the beauty is they truly seem unaware half the time. It's like they don't get their own feelings.
 

ithurt

New member
Joined
Mar 3, 2008
Messages
25
MBTI Type
INFP
Yep, the control is always for our own good! That's what makes it even more get-under-the-skin-ish.

I had a gym schedule and weekly menus and food shopping lists mapped out for me. Yes, healthy eating and strong muscles are good, but on my terms, not imposed!

This is one thing I don't like. I feel like infjs sometimes they do calculate or just instantly react in a way as to prove that whatever they did was for your own good. But sometimes, I'm left with the feeling that it's just strategic and just not felt, even if authentic. Like they just found a way to get the outcome they wanted and placate people. Sometimes I find it insulting. If I compare to intjs, well intjs just don't do that kind of thing even though intjs also like control over their lives. I've never been offended that way by intj for all the control over their environment that they need. There is something subtle in infj that is just very hard to really explain, but it's like they are so ... hmmm... selfish. I don't know how they can present so well, because once you know them well, well that presentation really wears off. You see something else. It's like intj has a bottom line to have a certain power and competence but other than that wants to uphold certain positive values. But infj...the positive values are not inspirational to them. They get these urges to tear down other people's values/defenses, etc. if you watch infj closely, they watch you like a dog. What's your weakness. Collect. What's your vulnerability. Collect. All while presenting like Jesus level empathy. Fucking annoying. LOL are infjs under my skin much?
 

ithurt

New member
Joined
Mar 3, 2008
Messages
25
MBTI Type
INFP
They literally forced to talk to people who are less than them because no one is better than them... so they'd be lonely if they ignored everyone.

Lol, I'm getting satisfaction recognizing things. Didn't know others saw these things..they make me feel completely insane in the head. I always think I'm delusional. But this is exactly how infjs can seem. Not all at all times...but yes several at many times.
 

ithurt

New member
Joined
Mar 3, 2008
Messages
25
MBTI Type
INFP
Unfortunately I have not and have seen the trail of psychological damage left in their "suffering martyr" exit paths leaving people hurt and believing the infjs insecurities and flaws are their own.


oh my god. i've seen this too. i can't believe someone else wrote this. it just make me feel less insane. i don't have a sample of 12, just 5.
but the infjs win arguments leaving the "other" as the flawed individual who can't see things straight.
 

AStrange~Nostalgia

New member
Joined
Jul 28, 2018
Messages
160
MBTI Type
ENFJ
Enneagram
2w1
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
except for "they never change their mind", twisted logic excuses and very sensitive to criticize, I LOVE THEM. they are cool dreamy and nice. with good quality research skills.

but I have a question. is an INFJ who doesn`t consider data on the lacking efficiency of his work considered unhealthy, and , in his mind refusing to admit to criticism ? or is it normal for some enne types?
 

Fidelia

Iron Maiden
Staff member
Joined
May 31, 2009
Messages
14,497
MBTI Type
INFJ
I don't know. Could be embarrassment and wanting to save face. Could be that they don't know how to proceed. Could be that they want so badly to do well that the stakes seem too high and they are kind of paralyzed into a Ni-Ti loop. By lowering the stakes of it and giving more broken down instructions or helping them see who they could impact by changing something, it may break them out of it. Usually Fe is a good way to break a Ni-Ti loop. Could be that they are convinced that the problem lies with them but don't feel free to say so. Or it could be just garden variety poor employee ness. Generally a lot of INFJs prefer to please the people around them, particularly bosses, but they can be stubborn now and then. Probably inviting discussion and making sure that their answers aren't held against them would give you some insight. Immaturity is something though that a lot of people can suffer from too, so it's hard to know. Sometimes if there is a lot that has to be done, INFJs will prioritize tasks, and it doesn't necessarily mean it's not on their radar. I know that my ENFJ mother has often thought that I'm just being irresponsible, when I've weighed out what is the most pressing, or I have reasons for hanging off on something that actually are valid. It took me awhile to even figure out what was going on though and I hated having her bad regard. Once I started thinking about it, I realized that I actually did have reasoning about it and needed to communicate that better. Most people prefer to succeed than not to, so if you give them tools to work with and invite them to talk, you probably will be able to sort it out. Often INFJs do need to be invited to talk, and know that they will be heard. They shouldn't necessarily need that, and as I've gotten older, I'm learning to volunteer more, but it has only been after a lot of years that I've started doing that on my own.
 

mgbradsh

Member
Joined
Nov 6, 2008
Messages
317
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
6w5
You people do realize that infjs are like 1% of the population right?
So half of the people there who've been close friends with like 5 infjs are getting at least half of those mistyped or are seriously telling us they know - on average - around 500 people well enough to type them.

I think that would hold up if we were all around random people all the time. We self-select though, attracting people we have things in common with, gravitating towards groups and careers that match our abilities.

I find with INFJs I almost always have a really intense instant connection. I’m not sure if it’s their intensity or mine, but it’s always there. It’s weird too, if there are 100 people in a room I’ll find the INFJ.

I’ve found that sometimes with INFJs that I’ve known that they can get kind of stuck in a loop. They aren’t happy with a situation, but their values almost leave them almost powerless to change things. As a friend, confidant, whatever, that can be difficult to watch and be involved with. I doubt it’s all INFJs, but it’s a pattern I’ve noticed.
 

RoRoRabbit

New member
Joined
Nov 28, 2018
Messages
25
Lol I was in a google rabbit hole, go figure.. and the question was something along the lines of what are some of INFJ's negative traits?

and someone answered the most prophetic, heart wrenching term paper on how horrible they were (Hitler, Osama Bin Laden and the like were referenced)..

it made me laugh (I havent updated my profile yet, but I'm an INFJ)..

that guy, whoever wrote it, must HATE us! hahaha though I did see his points. :happy2:
 
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