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[ENFJ] ENFJ's in Relationships

Neutralpov

New member
Joined
Jun 29, 2009
Messages
310
INTP guys....sigh

The last two guys that asked me out were INTP. They kind of watch or observed me while I was hanging out with out mutual group. I could tell they were mulling and laughing at what I had to say. Then they point blank snap out of their observer mode and declare that I should go on a date with them. I had to debate the heck out of one of them to make them accept my no!

INTP's if any of you read this. Please actually talk to me and flirt? Seems INTP's skip that step and forget that we (the responder) have to actually want to date you and talking to us helps or actually "winning us over."
 

Rebe

New member
Joined
Nov 15, 2009
Messages
1,431
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4sop
So my boyfriend is an ENTP, I thought it was kinda magical (in the beginning till he screwed up anyway)...

We first met while I was on a date with another guy at an art gallery. He was a friend of my best friends boy friend. Anyway, he was charming & we critiqued art together it was awesome! He tried to get me to hang out afterwards, but I had to go to Korea the next day. He got upset that I couldn’t hang out with him and I over heard him call me a bitch on my other friends cell phone-he’s loud lol. I was pissed and didnt like him much after that.

He kept pestering my friend about me, so I gave him a 2nd chance. He cooked me a beautiful dinner at his place, we had so much in common and had such great conversation :).

We dated for about a month and I decided that I wasn’t ready to be in a committed relationship. He was persistent and would not give up (a real go getter this guy is lol). So finally one day I was like FINE! Okay! Lets make it official…we have been together for almost 4 years now :).

Awww. This post makes me feel so gooey and warm on the inside. :hug:
 

JoSunshine

That's my name biotch!
Joined
Dec 17, 2009
Messages
659
MBTI Type
eNfj
Enneagram
2
I can just speak for myself, but I do like it when a guy is attentive, in-touch and does nice things for me but doesn't pressure me into a commitment. I like taking my time getting to know the other person and pressure to commit will send me packing becuase I feel like I haven't had enough time to assess the situation (usually around 3 months of seeing each other regularly). Usually by that time I am craving a commitment and will jump all over it.
 
R

ReflecTcelfeR

Guest
Well, I was going to see her this Saturday to make the 'connection', but I got into a pretty bad wreck today so I don't know if I'm going to be able to make it (as I have no vehicle now). It seems like someone or thing doesn't want me to have a relationship yet. Hopefully something happens soon.
 

Domino

ENFJ In Chains
Joined
Nov 5, 2007
Messages
11,429
MBTI Type
eNFJ
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
So my boyfriend is an ENTP, I thought it was kinda magical (in the beginning till he screwed up anyway)...

We first met while I was on a date with another guy at an art gallery. He was a friend of my best friends boy friend. Anyway, he was charming & we critiqued art together it was awesome! He tried to get me to hang out afterwards, but I had to go to Korea the next day. He got upset that I couldn’t hang out with him and I over heard him call me a bitch on my other friends cell phone-he’s loud lol. I was pissed and didnt like him much after that.

He kept pestering my friend about me, so I gave him a 2nd chance. He cooked me a beautiful dinner at his place, we had so much in common and had such great conversation :).

We dated for about a month and I decided that I wasn’t ready to be in a committed relationship. He was persistent and would not give up (a real go getter this guy is lol). So finally one day I was like FINE! Okay! Lets make it official…we have been together for almost 4 years now :).

He would have lost me forever at 'bitch'. He also might have gotten his dental plan activated. Learn some respect, little boy.

With a healthy ENTP, it's like someone's eaten my brain. I want to cuddle them. CUDDLE. WTH?! The dynamic can be pure wicked magic, even on the cold objective level. It doesn't feel frantic. A nice long slow hug so I can feel all of him and just absorb him -- a thought I would normally shy from. My Ne-dom twin has been good desensitizing me to people touching me.

I usually have a LOT in common with them for some reason - my kind of ENTP, I mean. Cars, books, music, even our clothes. They like to show me off, which I find funny and embarrassing because in spite of my loud clothes, I'm very shy. I like to be affectionate and generous with them in just about every way which is VERY significant for me. Friends, they have me on a plate because I love them and am safe, but romantically speaking, people hold back because a lot is at stake. They make me feel like I have very little defense but I don't feel unsafe.

I can see through them and I don't like them less for it. However, I don't tolerate nonsense, pushiness or quick-sells. That's immaturity in giant blinking lights. And "bitch" is such a huge automatic no-no that I need not explain it.
 

Sparrow

New member
Joined
May 28, 2010
Messages
2,366
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
Well, I was going to see her this Saturday to make the 'connection', but I got into a pretty bad wreck today so I don't know if I'm going to be able to make it (as I have no vehicle now). It seems like someone or thing doesn't want me to have a relationship yet. Hopefully something happens soon.


Awe bummer, It will happen when its supposed to I guess! :wubbie:

He would have lost me forever at 'bitch'. He also might have gotten his dental plan activated. Learn some respect, little boy.

With a healthy ENTP, it's like someone's eaten my brain. I want to cuddle them. CUDDLE. WTH?! The dynamic can be pure wicked magic, even on the cold objective level. It doesn't feel frantic. A nice long slow hug so I can feel all of him and just absorb him -- a thought I would normally shy from. My Ne-dom twin has been good desensitizing me to people touching me.

I usually have a LOT in common with them for some reason - my kind of ENTP, I mean. Cars, books, music, even our clothes. They like to show me off, which I find funny and embarrassing because in spite of my loud clothes, I'm very shy. I like to be affectionate and generous with them in just about every way which is VERY significant for me. Friends, they have me on a plate because I love them and am safe, but romantically speaking, people hold back because a lot is at stake. They make me feel like I have very little defense but I don't feel unsafe.

I can see through them and I don't like them less for it. However, I don't tolerate nonsense, pushiness or quick-sells. That's immaturity in giant blinking lights. And "bitch" is such a huge automatic no-no that I need not explain it.


Lucky for you. that sounds awesome! :)

My ENTP is a very immature and unhealthy one...he had a harsh life growing up.
 

tinker683

Whackus Bonkus
Joined
Nov 8, 2009
Messages
2,882
MBTI Type
ISFJ
Enneagram
9w1
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
My ENFJ-ex actually pursued me. We were both posters at a message board that was a support group for young people with depression. We met through a friend of ours on AIM. Our first telephone conversation was me staying up with her until 2am convincing her not to hurt herself.

After a while of talking with some other people she started to tell me how she "wanted me to herself" so that I devoted all of my time to her. She was always so nice and warm to me that eventually I did, I let her catch me and I'm glad I did :wubbie:.

It was a long distance relationship but we were together for about 2 and 1/2 years (of which we were physically together for about 3 months). She told me repeatedly she was drawn to me because I was always "so gentle and kind with her". She is to this day one of the sweetest people I've ever met.

I loved her very much and consider any man that's won over a (healthy) ENFJ female to be a lucky man indeed :wubbie:
 

Unkindloving

Lungs & Lips Locked
Joined
Dec 10, 2009
Messages
2,963
MBTI Type
ENFJ
Enneagram
4w5
My ENFJ-ex actually pursued me.
:laugh: That is so far from surprising. We're aggressive little beasts. If we see something we want and that it is plausible, you'd better believe we try to make it ours.
Precious
 
G

Ginkgo

Guest
:laugh: That is so far from surprising. We're aggressive little beasts. If we see something we want and that it is plausible, you'd better believe we try to make it ours.
Precious

smeagol.gif

:wubbie:
 

Domino

ENFJ In Chains
Joined
Nov 5, 2007
Messages
11,429
MBTI Type
eNFJ
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
If necessary, I will fell you like a wounded wildebeest.
 

jtanSis1

New member
Joined
Oct 1, 2008
Messages
291
MBTI Type
INFP
I think it would be fun to make an ENFJ chase, but never catch someone and see if it would break or spurn them on. HEE HEE
 
Joined
Feb 5, 2011
Messages
81
MBTI Type
ENFJ
Enneagram
4w3
I have only a limited experience as I've only ever been in a relationship with one guy, but for what's it worth...
I have no idea what my bf's personality type is, but the beginning of our relationship was truly 'magical' :) IFrom the moment we met he was pursuing me with vigour, but very gently at the same time. He actually asked me to be his girlfriend 2 weeks after we'd met, which was a total shock to me! I only agreed to it after 5 month, lol, but really enjoyed the 'courting period'. He was really caring, gentle and fun to be with, treated me like like I was the most beautiful and wonderful woman in the world :) He was really patient and took his time about it, but never for a moment stopped :)
He was very persistent and gave off the impression that he's not going to preassurize me into anything or force me to accept him - but that sooner or later he's gonna get me :)

And it worked, we've been together for almost 10 years :)
 

Domino

ENFJ In Chains
Joined
Nov 5, 2007
Messages
11,429
MBTI Type
eNFJ
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
:laugh: That is so far from surprising. We're aggressive little beasts. If we see something we want and that it is plausible, you'd better believe we try to make it ours.
Precious

Right on.
 
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