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[MBTI General] xNFP females, do you tend to be better friends with males?

Thalassa

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I've had male friends since I was a small child also. My best guy friend and I have been friends since birth practically. We played together as babies & were penpals when he moved away. I suppose this is why I am familiar with the brother-sister dynamic concept despite not being close to my half-brother.

I have a pseudo-brother too! I've known him since I was thirteen. He called me from the hospital when his daughter was born. :D
 

Lady_X

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well enfps don't really do formalities so much do we? we skip that a whole guarded i don't really know you part a lot...i think...right? sometimes...i don't know..i'm tired. goodnight. :)
 

Synarch

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That's why I have said on occasion that ENFP's are emotional sluts.
 

Lady_X

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yeah well fuck that. i am not at all that...some might be but that is not at all what i mean by that.
 
R

ReflecTcelfeR

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I think it's healthy to recognize as we live that this planet is shared with others like us, there may not be a direct connection between us, but the fact that a forum comprized of people from different geographical locations can relate so well is evidence of this and xNFP's are great at understanding this.
 

Synarch

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I have a pseudo-brother too! I've known him since I was thirteen. He called me from the hospital when his daughter was born. :D

I just realized something. You guys are relating (you and OrangeAppled), aren't you? See, that is very foreign territory.
 

Synarch

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yeah well fuck that. i am not at all that...some might be but that is not at all what i mean by that.

Oh, just in the sense that they are so open and, um, receptive to the emotions of others?
 

Thalassa

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I just realized something. You guys are relating (you and OrangeAppled), aren't you? See, that is very foreign territory.

It's not that foreign. We may have disagreed in some threads, but I recall when I first came to this site and I thought I was just a hardass INFP, I related to her more than some of the other INFPs.
 

OrangeAppled

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I think XNFPs can be really bad at gauging boundaries and appropriate signals. There are several threads already on the forum specifically about XNFPs attracting the wrong kind of attention, etc. INFPs moreso than ENFPs, I think partially because introversion makes you more receptive/likely target to and of peoples energies and advances.

While I think this is true sometimes, I also think that NFPs can be very aware of non-tangible clues, like "emotional vibes" & that sort of thing. I can usually sense when a guy finds me attractive - I just tend to become too humble/insecure to ever initiate even when I get clear vibes. In a friend situation, I'd take care to make it clear I don't have any romantic interest if I got that feeling (and yes, I have done that before).

For me, the thing with the weirdos latching on has more to do with misplaced pity/compassion than not being aware of their intentions.

I am also not one to flirt without some genuine interest & tend to send aloof/disinterested signals to men, even unintentionally when I do find them attractive.
 
R

ReflecTcelfeR

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Yeah, I probably wouldn't be very good at that and in fact am not. This whole making connections things.
 

Southern Kross

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I do think that XNFP's are sometimes so inclusive and accepting of others that it works against them because they are not really prepared for boundary crossers, being such reticent boundary crossers themselves.
Wow, what a fascinating (and likely apt) observation. The crossing of boundaries by myself and others makes me panicky... :shocking: :unsure:
 

Synarch

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It's not that foreign. We may have disagreed in some threads, but I recall when I first came to this site and I thought I was just a hardass INFP, I related to her more than some of the other INFPs.

Oh, I'm sorry. I mean it is foreign to me. I can't remember really doing that. It seems like my conversations usually involve the transfer of information.

When I see people relating through conversation I wonder what's happening. What are they experiencing? Why do they do it?
 

OrangeAppled

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It's not that foreign. We may have disagreed in some threads, but I recall when I first came to this site and I thought I was just a hardass INFP, I related to her more than some of the other INFPs.

I think he meant it's foreign for him ;)

And that's interesting....I feel my male friends DO relate to me. Maybe I am delusional, but I don't think so :D. I mean, it helps that these guys are NFs or SFPs & we DO have many common interests and a tendency to like to relate emotionally to people. I've even had an INTP friend relate to me (but admittedly there was a romantic vibe - still, he related! :D ).
 
R

ReflecTcelfeR

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I think they are using a positive form of empathy, which allows this connection to happen.... but it is rather mystical.
 

Synarch

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Wow, what a fascinating (and likely apt) observation. The crossing of boundaries by myself and others makes me panicky... :shocking: :unsure:

See, I actively cross boundaries because I want to know how their mechanism works and what they'll do. And I want to know if I can affect others in some way. And if I can affect them, what happens and why?
 

Lady_X

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Oh, just in the sense that they are so open and, um, receptive to the emotions of others?

i mean that many of us have a preference for personal conversations...dislike the formality of pleasant chit chat and skip ahead to more interesting (to us) types of personal conversations...to anyone...the old woman at the park...or kids or the new person at work...not in that...feed my ego and crave me sexually please way that you made it sound like.
 
R

ReflecTcelfeR

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Boundaries are ultimately useless as they only exist because we allow them too... we can destroy them at any time most just choose not too, but this hinders a great deal of learning on everyones part.
 
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