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  1. #11
    Member SinistralPal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lady X View Post
    oh sure not in the least offended. i was just saying that isn't quite the dynamic as i see it. i would see the entp guy being more dependent on the infj then the other way around...just loosely based on my infj mother and enfp dad
    Funny. That's what I would have typed my parents as.
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  2. #12
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    yeah? oh that's cool...and was your mother the sane rational one?
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  3. #13
    Member SinistralPal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lady X View Post
    yeah? oh that's cool...and was your mother the sane rational one?
    Oh man, well, it's only the three of us (I am an only child) and the dynamic between the three of us is just...funny. Pretty much all we do is scream at each other that we are all insane. My mom can't stand me and my dad - cuz we are so xxxP it isn't funny. We both go off wandering around and don't come back. Ha. My mom ties things together and plans things out to keep us all to a schedule (fails miserably, haha). I constantly criticize my mom for making rash and illogical decisions based on "gut instinct". She can be uber-mystical. Sometimes that can work to my advantage though - if my dad or I come up with some crazy daft plan, she'll be the cheerleading squad, haha. My dad seems to be the one that takes the "sober second look" at things and tries to approach it rationally. However, if he flies off the handle at something, my mom starts to wear the "logical shoes" if you will. It's a weird balance. That being said, I /facepalm at my parents a lot, haha.

    Oh yeah, and despite me living in another country, I never feel detached from them. Sometimes that can be very reassuring, and sometimes a little constricting. Either way, I am glad I grew up with them <3
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  4. #14
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    oh that's funny...i love that. we had 3 enfps in our family...fun fun..
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  5. #15
    にゃん runvardh's Avatar
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    Look more to your values than the four letters. The four letters just help in translating communication.
    Dreams are best served manifest and tangible.

    INFP, 6w7, IEI

    I accept no responsibility, what so ever, for the fact that I exist; I do, however, accept full responsibility for what I do while I exist.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  6. #16
    Member SinistralPal's Avatar
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    ENTP's have...values??
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  7. #17
    にゃん runvardh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SinistralPal View Post
    ENTP's have...values??
    I know it surprised the shit out of me when I found that out myself - in-sane . Seriously though, if you can find out what you value and look for the guy based off that, the four letters turn more into the style of communication needed rather than some brick wall of "OMG, how do I deal with this?!!!!!!!!11111!!1111".
    Dreams are best served manifest and tangible.

    INFP, 6w7, IEI

    I accept no responsibility, what so ever, for the fact that I exist; I do, however, accept full responsibility for what I do while I exist.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  8. #18
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    Good luck. I believe INFJ males are less than 0.5% of the population.

  9. #19
    Member SinistralPal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Weber View Post
    Good luck. I believe INFJ males are less than 0.5% of the population.
    innorite? fuck me.

    ....hence another reason to post the contention. "You expect us to find these mofos??"
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  10. #20
    Professional Trickster Esoteric Wench's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SinistralPal View Post
    So, my question is, does this "perfect" relationship dynamic still hold true for ENTP female + INFJ male? In my opinion, classic female and male roles in relationships in an ENTP female + INFJ male dynamic would be extremely skewed.
    I think this is a very interesting point, worthy of consideration. Gender undoubtedly plays a role in how type manifests. Thus, it must undoubtedly play a role in these kind of dynamics.

    Your Assumptions - Gender Roles Support male ENTP/Female INFJ pairings
    Your question seems to based on the assumption that a big component of ENTP male / INFJ female happiness relies on a stereotypical male / female dynamic. Ergo, if the perfectness of this relationship is damaged when the woman is the ENTP.

    I'm not sure I think that I agree with your thought process here. What draws INFJs/INTJs and ENTPs/ENFPs together is the synchronicity in their respective function hierarchies.
    • ENTP — Ne > Ti > Fe > Si > Ni > Te > Fi > Se
    • ENFP — Ne > Fi > Te > Si > Ni > Fe > Ti > Se
    • INTJ — Ni > Te > Fi > Se > Ne > Ti > Fe > Si
    • INFJ — Ni > Fe > Ti >Se > Ne > Fi > Te > Si

    Note that except for the T & F functions being switched between the Thinkers and Feelers, the hierarchy of functions is in the same order. This seems like it'd be stronger glue than housewife/breadwinner roles in how these four types pick their mates.

    My Assumptions - All People Feel Pulled to Fit In:
    Minimizing the Gender Stereotype Gap

    But I do think there is something going on here.

    I hypothesize that the farther out of gender stereotype someone is, the higher their motivation will be to choose a mate they perceive will help them close the gender stereotype gap by allowing them to express the aspects of their personality that are gender stereotypical.

    So who is farther out of gender stereotype of the four types I listed above?

    Introverts > Extraverts
    Males > Females

    Well, men have more rigid expectations re: their societal roles than women. And, E's focus their energy outside themselves which grounds them in the world and keeps them cognizant of how their behavior is judged by others. I's tend to be more impractical and less influenced by outside pressures.

    Thus, male introverts out of gender stereotype (i.e., INFJ males) experience the greatest gender gap and thus have the strongest motivation to choose a mate that helps them get closer to the male ideal.

    By the same token, ENTP women would experience the least gender stereotype gap. Thus, they would have very low motivation to pick a mate that would help them modulate their out of gender stereotype tendencies.

    The $64,000 Question
    Which of the four personality types listed above do INFJ males perceive will be their ideal complement AND help them more comfortably express their stereotypical maleness. I predict the ENFP. She is unafraid to lavish her lover with all manner of pda and adoration; in general, she is not interested in leading others or being confrontational; she is more than willing to tailor her approach to meet her male INFJ's needs thus in some ways he sets the agenda.

    If my theory is correct, an INFJ male will be far less motivated to pick an ENTP female. In sum, I predict that while female ENTP / male INFJ matches might have all the advantages of the male ENTP/ female INFJ pairing in terms of complimentary cognitive processes, INFJ males will be less attracted to the dynamic here.

    <Insert cringe here, while Esoteric Wench waits on it to 'hit the fan'.>

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