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[NF] Are NFs bad at making good decisions?

William K

Uniqueorn
Joined
Aug 13, 2009
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I think the topic implies that F-based decisions have a greater chance of being bad than totally T-based decisions. I doubt that any studies have been made on this, but I would believe that going by the gut would offer greater rewards than being totally logical about things. Without risk where is the fun in life? We might as well all be robots. Not saying that T types are robots btw :D
 

Unkindloving

Lungs & Lips Locked
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I would say we are prone to assessing the emotional outcomes vs the material outcomes. In dealing in a more fickle way, probably. This isn't due to bad intentions though or diving into headfirst into something without good odds. The circumstances are just more prone to changing with emotion-based decision-making.

Regret is an interesting thing that should be taken into account. If one makes a commonly bad decision and doesn't regret/gains from it in other ways, does that keep it a bad decision?
I've done a lot of things that most people would regret, but find so little when i try to recall any bad decisions. It's all in perspective.
 
G

garbage

Guest
I am not sure if you now not being serious.:huh:

One of my three posts in this thread is serious

(actually uh I guess two of my four posts, now)


But if you are.. You can always decide to eat well and exercise.
The worst obstacles of all are the self imposed ones.

yeah, this exactly, pretty much

In a case such as that one, where someone is trying to lose excess ice cream weight, eating well and exercising is a pretty "obviously good" decision. And so is deciding to no longer eat ice cream every day.

So, for one who struggles with making good decisions, start with the low hanging fruit--the obvious decisions.


I'm also a big believer in the philosophy that "a moving car is much easier to steer than one that's sitting still". If you're stuck, just. ... do something and adjust your course from there.
 
G

garbage

Guest
also, Dale Carnegie's got a good, worthwhile story from some dude in his book, How to Stop Worrying and Start Living. Since I'm lazy, I'm just gonna post it verbatim:

Let's take the case of Galen Litchfield-a man I have known for several years; one of the most successful American business men in the Far East. Mr. Litchfield was in China in 1942, when the Japanese invaded Shanghai. And here is his story as he told it to me while a guest in my home:

"Shortly after the Japs took Pearl Harbour," Galen Litchfield began, "they came swarming into Shanghai. I was the manager of the Asia Life Insurance Company in Shanghai. They sent us an 'army liquidator'-he was really an admiral- and gave me orders to assist this man in liquidating our assets. I didn't have any choice in the matter. I could co-operate-or else. And the 'or else' was certain death.

"I went through the motions of doing what I was told, because I had no alternative. But there was one block of securities, worth $750,000, which I left off the list I gave to the admiral. I left that block of securities off the list because they belonged to our Hong Kong organisation and had nothing to do with the Shanghai assets. All the same, I feared I might be in hot water if the Japs found out what I had done. And they soon found out.

"I wasn't in the office when the discovery was made, but my head accountant was there. He told me that the Jap admiral flew into a rage, and stamped and swore, and called me a thief and a traitor! I had defied the Japanese Army! I knew what that meant. I would be thrown into the Bridge house!

"The Bridge house 1 The torture chamber of the Japanese Gestapo! I had had personal friends who had killed themselves rather than be taken to that prison. I had had other friends who had died in that place after ten days of questioning and torture. Now I was slated for the Bridge house myself!

"What did I do? I heard the news on Sunday afternoon. I suppose I should have been terrified. And I would have been terrified if I hadn't had a definite technique for solving my problems. For years, whenever I was worried I had always gone to my typewriter and written down two questions-and the answers to these questions:

"1. What am I worrying about?
"2. What can I do about it?

"I used to try to answer those questions without writing them down. But I stopped that years ago. I found that writing down both the questions and the answers clarifies my thinking.

So, that Sunday afternoon, I went directly to my room at the Shanghai Y.M.C.A. and got out my typewriter. I wrote: "I. What am I worrying about?

I am afraid I will be thrown into the Bridge house tomorrow morning.

"Then I typed out the second question:

"2. What can I do about it?

"I spent hours thinking out and writing down the four courses of action I could take-and what the probable consequence of each action would be.

1. I can try to explain to the Japanese admiral. But he "no speak English". If I try to explain to him through an interpreter, I may stir him up again. That might mean death, for he is cruel, would rather dump me in the Bridge house than bother talking about it.

2. I can try to escape. Impossible. They keep track of me all the time. I have to check in and out of my room at the Y.M.C.A. If I try to escape, I'll probably be captured and shot.

3. I can stay here in my room and not go near the office again. If I do, the Japanese admiral will be suspicion, will probably send soldiers to get me and throw me into the Bridge-house without giving me a chance to say a word.

4. I can go down to the office as usual on Monday morning. If I do, there is a chance that the Japanese admiral may be so busy that he will not think of what I did. Even if he does think of it, he may have cooled off and may not bother me. If this happens, I am all right. Even if he does bother me, I'll still have a chance to try to explain to him. So, going down to the office as usual on Monday morning, and acting as if nothing had gone wrong gives me two chances to escape the Bridge-house.

"As soon as I thought it all out and decided to accept the fourth plan-to go down to the office as usual on Monday morning-I felt immensely relieved.

"When I entered the office the next morning, the Japanese admiral sat there with a cigarette dangling from his mouth. He glared at me as he always did; and said nothing. Six weeks later-thank God-he went back to Tokyo and my worries were ended.

"As I have already said, I probably saved my life by sitting down that Sunday afternoon and writing out all the various steps I could take and then writing down the probable consequences of each step and calmly coming to a decision. If I hadn't done that, I might have floundered and hesitated and done the wrong thing on the spur of the moment. If I hadn't thought out my problem and come to a decision, I would have been frantic with worry all Sunday afternoon. I wouldn't have slept that night. I would have gone down to the office Monday morning with a harassed and worried look; and that alone might have aroused the suspicion of the Japanese admiral and spurred him to act.

"Experience has proved to me, time after time, the enormous value of arriving at a decision. It is the failure to arrive at a fixed purpose, the inability to stop going round and round in maddening circles, that drives men to nervous breakdowns and living hells. I find that fifty per cent of my worries vanishes once I arrive at a clear, definite decision; and another forty per cent usually vanishes once I start to carry out that decision.

"So I banish about ninety per cent of my worries by taking these four steps:

"1. Writing down precisely what I am worrying about.
"2. Writing down what I can do about it.
"3. Deciding what to do.
"4. Starting immediately to carry out that decision."

 

Froody Blue Gem

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I wouldn't say all NFs are but it certainly applies to me and it has from a young age. Someone who was strong in their values probably does have the potential to make good decisions, and NFs are more than capable of falling into this category. I tend to weigh out my options but I struggle to come to the conclusion which int he best.

I take people who I care about into consideration often and if certain outcomes may make certain people unhappy, I get stumped. When I have time to process, I can make a decent decision but I can't make one on the spot. I bounce around in my head what the best possible option would be, but then something that can go wrong pops up, or something that's better about an alternate option.
 

Caribelle

Member
Joined
Oct 16, 2018
Messages
57
Hmmm... I have an INFP friend who's very intelligent but makes some very questionable financial/career/relationships decisions sometimes, that have led to some bad consequences for her. A lot of these decisions seem to be 'what makes her feel happy', or 'what she feels in her spirit is the right thing to do'.... but that don't really hold up to objective scrutiny or reality, at least in the eyes of other observers. E.g she has expensive taste and likes to live a comfortable lifestyle whether or not her budget can support it. This has led to her sometimes securing high-interest loans for unnecessary material items - these loans invariably have huge monthly payments and leave her even more broke at the end of the day. When I ask her why she needs to get these things when she obviously cannot afford it - she justifies it by saying she has to be comfortable etc - she has to be a peace in her spirit at home etc etc. There have been other decisions related to career etc - that she makes that seem to be risking everything/'throwing everything to the wind' - but again her justification is that she wants her mind to be at peace etc.

I think it somehow relates to Fi and wanting to do things that align with her core values (even if that means taking huge risks). The decisions she makes are decisions me and my other ISFJ friend would never make, as we're naturally conservative and cautious... :D My ISFJ friend calls her impulsive.
 

cacaia

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I think, too, it comes down to what's acceptable in our day and age. The society of today emphasizes many ST values, and considers most NF values "fluff" or "not that important". So it is a topic that is a bit difficult to navigate. Decisions made with just in the moment feeling (impulsive) will possibly not end up well. Decisions made with F backed up by N might play out well in the end, though others might think otherwise....
 

Betty Blue

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Eh, not necessarily... are they together and organised …. in their own way, but not typical. Are they good at judging people.... hit and miss. Sometimes you look over the edge and jump anyway, or take a blind leap... it has some positives as well as negatives
 
Joined
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I don’t often make emotion based decisions- I do often make value based ones. Those can seem like bad decisions depending on an individual’s beliefs. However, I’m not concerned with living up to someone else’s definition of success.

Have I made bad decisions? Absolutely. What’s a good and bad decision can often be judged by our own value systems. So although John Smith may have no problem climbing on the backs of others to get ahead I may decide the reward isn’t worth the sacrifice of my ethics. Is it a bad decision to not crush others to get ahead? I’m sure John Smith thinks it is. It’s a good thing I’m not him.
 

The Cat

Just a Cat who hangs out at the Crossroads
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I don’t often make emotion based decisions- I do often make value based ones. Those can seem like bad decisions depending on an individual’s beliefs. However, I’m not concerned with living up to someone else’s definition of success.

Have I made bad decisions? Absolutely. What’s a good and bad decision can often be judged by our own value systems. So although John Smith may have no problem climbing on the backs of others to get ahead I may decide the reward isn’t worth the sacrifice of my ethics. Is it a bad decision to not crush others to get ahead? I’m sure John Smith thinks it is. It’s a good thing I’m not him.

John Crichton doesnt believe in stepping on the backs of others to get ahead? I wonder what Moya would say about that?
farscape.harvey.jpg
 

The Cat

Just a Cat who hangs out at the Crossroads
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Crackers don’t matter.

A fair point. I suppose John Smith would have already spilled his guts about wormholes and thus dooming your entire miserable species to enslavement at the hands of the Peacekeepers and Sebacians. But then that's why I love being in your head and not his. The Struggle is the glory.
latest
 

Coriolis

Si vis pacem, para bellum
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I don’t often make emotion based decisions- I do often make value based ones. Those can seem like bad decisions depending on an individual’s beliefs. However, I’m not concerned with living up to someone else’s definition of success.
This is a critical distinction, and one often overlooked. Everyone makes decisions based on values. I don't see how it can be otherwise. This is not incompatible with making logical decisions. In fact, the two go hand in glove. Logic, after all, is just a process. Values are an important input to that process, for everyone. Sure, someone can misapply logic and end up with an outcome inconsistent with one's values or other inputs. One can also arrive at a decision just as logical as someone else's but different due to starting with different inputs (i.e. values). As always, garbage in/garbage out applies.
 
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