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[ENFP] What does an UNhealthy ENFP look like?

TheZEDMan

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Joined
May 28, 2010
Messages
12
meth2.jpg


Here's what one looks like, oh wait.... that's me :S
 

mangos123

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Jun 3, 2010
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3
MBTI Type
enfp
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7w8
So I'm 20, and I totally was an unhealthy ENFP a year ago for a short period of time. I had messed up bad w/ my life-long best friend. I felt so lost and confused, and I immediately passed the blame to anyone except me.

I was not accountable for my actions AT ALL! Since I was also a freshman in college, I went out all the time and definitely engaged in risky sexual behavior and binge drinking. Basically I wanted to run away from the problem, and make sure I was busy so I didn't have to deal with it. Whenever I was alone, I would think about what I did and get really depressed. I thought my life could never be the same ever again, and that I would never find a true friend like that again. I just thought of the worst when I was alone. so I hung out w/ people, pretending to act like them b/c I was too insecure to act like my normal self and was scared of rejection. I NEEDED to stay busy. So if I wasn't out partying with my "friends", then I was in the library studying extremely hard.
If you looked at my life just on the surface, it looked pretty awesome. I had amazing grades, plenty of friends to hang out with, partied all the time, and still worked a part-time job. You would have no idea that deep down inside I was a complete mess. I physically exhausted myself to the point where I'd pass out once I was in bed (I slept about only 4 hours max a day). I became extremely careless, got sent to detox and then another weekend even hospitalized for passing out from binge drinking. I was totally trying to escape reality, and argued w/ anyone who said I was in the wrong. It sometimes even worked b/c I believed full heartedly I was not doing anything wrong. I manipulated my way out of getting in trouble or having things recorded on my record for the situations where I got in trouble for drinking. I somehow brought the topic to a matter of ethics and questioning the authority whether they really had the right to get me in trouble using the facts. I went out and partied more the next day, thinking the other incidents were not my fault.

Basically I eventually hit a horrible break drown, and then refused to talk anyone near the end of the semester (also end of the school year). I cried myself to sleep every night quietly and felt so alone and hopeless.

Anyways, that was a bad time period for me now looking back. Luckily I studied abroad 2 weeks after that semester (during the summer) and it changed my life. Now I feel better than ever :) But yes, unhealthy ENFPs can make a horrible experience for themselves and those around them and also be extremely manipulative. I think all we need is just a little hope b/c at that state we see none.
 

Queen Kat

The Duchess of Oddity
Joined
Apr 3, 2009
Messages
3,053
MBTI Type
E.T.
Enneagram
7w8
Well, I'm perfectly fine, but my Fi is clearly pretty damaged for an ENFP.
 

skin

New member
Joined
Aug 4, 2008
Messages
20
MBTI Type
INFP
The same way an healthy ENFP look like.
In other words, millions of different ways.

A good tip is to not project unhealthiness onto others when they are not you.

If you visit two radically different cultures you will notice that what is immaturity in one, is mostly just amusing in others. A lot of mainstream culture in some nations, without naming names, is definitely unhealthy according to the DSM-IV, yet i won't call it out loud, as i do not understand their contexts and mindstates.

It's overall pretty destructive to label anything as unhealthy, unless the individual itself feels his or her behavior is ruining their life.
There was a time they burned witches you know.
 

INTPness

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Jan 22, 2009
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INTP
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5w4
- Unable to tell things like they REALLY are (cannot separate facts from their feelings)
- Twists facts and is UNAWARE of it.
- Often delusional
- Overemotional
- Unable to comprehend/intolerant of impersonal reasoning
- Projects their own emotions on others

All of these wrapped up into 1 situation: An ENFP friend falls in love with you (even though you made it extremely clear that you did not see them in that way - and there was no physical intimacy whatsoever) and then months later when you finally break it to them that "it's just not going to happen - I've told you this a million different times", they tell you they don't ever want to talk to you again and they can't believe what you did to them. :shock:
 

INTP

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Jul 31, 2009
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Im not 100% sure if my cousin is an enfp, but hes like drinking almost everyday, smoking weed and doing meth and about everything else but heroine sometimes and that sometimes is like one to few times a week, even tho he has been in cannabis psychosis once and cannabis/meth psychosis once and has a bipolar disorder. He has a daughter, but his ex girlfriend doesent live with him anymore, neither does his kid. I dont think that he is overemotional, delusional or anything like that, but he just cant take a responsibility about anything and just wants to go drink and do drugs with his friends. If he didnt live near his friends who are always drunk or/and doing drugs maybe he could keep a job and have more healthy family life, but he has to do stuff all the time and has to be always going, but only thing to do in that suburb is drugs and alcohol..
 

copperfish17

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Dec 13, 2009
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712
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INTP
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5w4
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
All of these wrapped up into 1 situation: An ENFP friend falls in love with you (even though you made it extremely clear that you did not see them in that way - and there was no physical intimacy whatsoever) and then months later when you finally break it to them that "it's just not going to happen - I've told you this a million different times", they tell you they don't ever want to talk to you again and they can't believe what you did to them. :shock:

Personal experience? I'm so sorry. :doh:

Also, I can relate.
 

You

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Jun 8, 2010
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2,124
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entp
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7w8
Me.

Unhealthy ENFP said:
When I say depressed, I mean it in the literal sense. Depression, it can strike anyone, and even if ENFP's seem happy go lucky 24/7, they've got a dark side too. More often than not it will not come out because of the ENFP nature to always look on the bright side, but given a bad enough situation and a smack into reality, these are the stages of what a depressed ENFP will go through.


Stage One: ENFP will start feeling a bit lonely and disconnected. They will think it's just a stage that will pass, and will try to ignore it.

Stage Two: The ENFP will start feeling even more lonely, this can usually be brought about by having a hard time with family or feeling like they are insecure in their relationships in general. Stage One increases, and the ENFP will start feeling anxious.

Stage Three: The ENFP's feeling of anxiousness will become overbearing, and they may feel extremely insecure when talking to other people. They lose the quick wit and charm they used to have. The smile will because more nervous and the laugh will become less natural. They will still be trying to convince themselves it;s just a stage that they are going through and that nothing is wrong.

Stage Four: ENFP will most likely hit shut down mode. They will not talk to other people about their feelings or what is going on unless asked specific, prying questions. They will have a really hard time talking to people and feeling like they can relate. They will start coming across as an introvert.

Stage Five: The ENFP will be extremely stressed, lonely, and emotional. May start bursting out randomly and be extremely moody. Will experience periods of highs and lows. The ENFP may start crying over something seemingly insignificant. They will do this because there is so much bottled feelings up inside and that may have been the last thing to set them off edge.

Stage Six: The ENFP will start lashing out at other people like above, but more extremely. Will most likely show complete and utter disregard for authority. They will also start hurting the people they care about, to make them back off and go away. All the while the ENFP, through the stages, will try to convince themselves that nothing is wrong and that they will get better, and thus the problem worsens.

Stage Seven: They will finally admit to themselves that there is a problem but try consciously to contradict it. They will try to force themselves to relax and be wonderful again. They will try to establish the facts- what the problems is, how it went wrong, and what to do.

Stage Eight: If it gets worse at this point, the ENFP will not be acting like themselves at all. They will not be thinking clearly, and will most likely suffer from being illogical, irrational, and as well may suffer from extremely headaches. They will give up on caring and will not pay attention to the world around them, instead focusing all of their energy into their inner world of what they feel and dwell on it. They will no longer have any motivation to care or do the things they love.

Stage Nine: Your ENFP will start enjoying dark humor ad freaking other people out for the hell of it, especially the people they care about. However, at this stage they will not do this too extremely to the people they care about because their is that small piece of the ENFP that wants to hold the relationship in tact. They will push you away and drag you back in, and become and emotional roller coaster for anyone and everyone around them. If you ask what is wrong, the ENFP will completely shoot you down unless it is in a structured environment and they think that you are somebody that they can trust. However at this point the ENFP will become extremely untrusting, so talking to them about anything is much like walking on fragile glass about to fall apart and break forever. The ENFP will hold grudges.

Stage Ten: Complete personality turnaround, the ENFP will have lost it, or will have appeared to. Complete emotional instability and recklessness. They will be completely and utterly impulsive to the point of stupidity. They will not care about their well being or anybody else's. At this pion, the ENFP will be so far in their heads it will be nearly impossible to get through to them unless you sink to his or her own level of insanity and instability. They will have given up on life altogether, and will most likely have forgotten what it was like to really feel alive and well again.


I've seen about 2 extremely unhealthy ENFP'd in my lifetime and this is what I have experienced. This is still in edit mode, basically a thesis, so please correct me if I'm wrong. I would like this to be as accurate as possible, and additional information would be great.
 

Thalassa

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May 3, 2009
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I think an unhealthy ENFP can also look high-strung and overly beligerent about strong opinions or "causes". I think the happier the ENFP, the more laid back and accepting we become.

I'll just let you guess how I know this.
 

Vamp

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Jul 2, 2010
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ENFP
I consider myself pretty unhealthy now but I blame others for most things and I have a supreme lack of self actualization. My nitpicking seems reasonable. She won't listen to me even if it means not having food in the house and I nitpick about her refusing to put together a budget and be half way efficient with money.
 

Pixelholic

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Jun 20, 2010
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8w7
I think I'm pretty unhealthy. My mood swings aren't as bad but I still have random depression and a desire to be the center of all drama (that I've learned to quell, but the desire is still there.) Mostly I get this completely bizarre existential detachment from my friends when I should be having a good time with them. I think my parents are to blame mostly, fuckers.

I also stubbornly refuse to go to therapy, repression probably isn't that healthy either.
 

Ratsimoan

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Mar 25, 2010
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289
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enfp
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4w5
I considered myself an healthy enfp. But in my teens I was pretty unhealthy. I didn't used any substances and wasn't a partying animal but I did hurt people. What I learn is their are times when I might slip into an unhealthy state but I'm quick get myself out of that state. Having experiencing a life of a healthy enfp- I don't want to go back! I can't stand hurting people!
 

Moiety

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Aug 3, 2008
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I don't know if I'm thoroughly unhealthy or surprisingly healthy for an ENFP. I could just be normal too but, and I'm not saying this to stroke my ego and wanting to be more different, it doesn't seem likely considering what I read of what other ENFPs.
 

Moiety

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Aug 3, 2008
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Funny how I don't check off any of those. I'd like more positive reinforcement, but I don't search for it. In fact you can say the words that come out of my mouth are often only getting me negative reinforcement and I still indulge in contrarianism anyway :p
 

Vamp

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Jul 2, 2010
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ENFP
I've checked all except drinking because my folks won't let me have any. ...they know I'll become an official alcoholic.

Oh and I'd be promiscuous if I didn't have such negative feelings towards people right now.
 
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