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Thread: Fi users

  1. #21
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    INFj None


    The first time my now-husband told me he loved me I was totally caught like a deer in the headlights. I mean, I thought I loved him, but we really barely knew each other. It was very awkward, but I finally said "ditto." And you know what? Since he really did love me, he stuck around until I could say it with absolute certainty.

    I would say it comes down to maturity, but my husband was only 20 when we had our little experience.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  2. #22
    Sugar Hiccup OrangeAppled's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    4w5 sp/sx
    IEI Ni


    Quote Originally Posted by Aurel View Post
    It's cute that an INTP is watching crappy TV and blaming it on NFPs. <3

    I will be the first to admit that I am reserved in expressing my feelings at times....however, if a man told me he loved me & I returned the feeling, then I would feel safe enough to express that. It would be harder for me to express it first though.

    If I was unsure, then I would state that & let him know that I just needed time. I don't expect someone to read my mind.

    I agree that it seems this woman was unsure, then realized later she did care for him, & now she wants to rewrite the past. I don't see how this connects to Fi though.
    Often a star was waiting for you to notice it. A wave rolled toward you out of the distant past, or as you walked under an open window, a violin yielded itself to your hearing. All this was mission. But could you accomplish it? (Rilke)

    INFP | 4w5 sp/sx | RLUEI - Primary Inquisitive | Tritype is tripe

  3. #23
    Join Date
    Apr 2010


    Quote Originally Posted by Lady X View Post
    i don't believe her. i think she realized after he left how she felt and it was too late.
    I absolutely agree with this statement. He left and her hurt made her reflect and pretty much think "Oh shit, that was love... I fucked up."

    ON the other hand.. love is a hard word to say. I think too often it gets thrown around and isn't meant.
    I've had someone say they love me within the first day of a relationship, I kindly told them that I couldn't say it back, but that they should wait because it should come.

    Two weeks in, he admitted it hurt him too much for the love to be unrequited, I had to figure myself out.
    I spent a few hours looking up definitions of love and scribbling key-points on my arm until I realized I did love him.

    It wasn't until months later I realized I was IN LOVE. They are different.

    Maybe the girl in the show loved him, but wasn't in love so she didn't want to say it.
    I tell my friends I love them constantly (a hurtful thing for my boyfriend since it took me a while to say it back to him), but I say it to them because I know they don't desire me to be IN LOVE with them, and they understand that my words do not mean I am in love but rather that I care extra deeply about them.

    I feel it's a superbly important difference that many people neglect.

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