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[ENFP] To INFP's and ENFP's...

lunalove

New member
Joined
Mar 20, 2010
Messages
194
MBTI Type
ENF
Enneagram
6w5
does it? i'm not that energetic in for real life...hmm

but...i test 7w8 but am maybe 7w6 i can't totally decide.

:) I don't know you well enough certainly...but 7 suits you from what I know so far!

i honestly assume everyone likes everyone until they do something to make them not like them.
That sounds like a very positive non-judgment to me! :)
 

sculpting

New member
Joined
Jan 28, 2009
Messages
4,148
I pounce on hubby after I've been alone all day. I want to share my day with him, hear about his day, and be close. If I see someone who seems shy I am likely to go ver and chat with them. On the other hand, I have always dreaded parties (unless I hosted them for a group of close friends to watch them interact...they always wanted to know why I just stood on the sidelines and observed?), and I really enjoy my time alone. I would rather read a book then go to a party, and often I often get social anxiety believing others don't like me?

I hate parties-but yeah pounce on my coworkers after not having freinds around all weekend. Chat for ten minutes to five different people, then I can start work.

Alone time is sacred. Funny sometimes I want to be around people-but not interact with them-like reading by myself in a bookstore.
But parties-Yucky!!

I hear ya! Do you feel drained after being in a situation when you are considered outgoing? If so, what is it that drains you? Thanks! :)

TOTALLY. I think I use so much Ne, that having to focus and interact can be exhausting. Then I need to hide away for a day. If it is a close friend it is great but anyone I would have to make an effort to interact with is bad. The worst thing I ever had to do was drive from Michigan to Texas with my ISTP mom-in-law. She talked the whole time about very specific details of very specific people-12 hours a day. It was like being beaten with a bat over and over again. At work, I train or give lectures. I really enjoy helping the customers, but by the end of the day my brain is empty. I need quiet time.

Maybe this is a totally weird (or even incorrect) analogy for Fi and Ne, but I sort of think of it like there is this safe place, deep inside of me, like a nest or a den, and then there is this world of ideas all around... am I constantly scanning through this world of ideas, collecting interesting or shiny or profound ones and then when I am overloaded, bringing them back to the nest to be nurtured (Ne dominant, Fi auxiliary)? Or am I in the nest to begin with, nurturing and cultivating the ideas that I have and then going out from time to time to gather more (Fi dominant, Ne auxiliary)?

Probably depending on where I am in life I have been both. But I'd say my personal balance leans more toward the gathering and less toward the nurturing, maybe like 60%/40% or something?

This is really awesome Gromit-that description is amazing.

I'm beginning to think I'm simply a mix or something! I don't like being social most of the time and I feel awkward in social situations, in groups especially. I am more comfortable with strangers funny enough! I have no problem speaking to someone I don't know...but put me in a group of people (whether I know them or not!) and I need a time out! I don't like spending too much time with people...but I do yap about my day or other things on my mind if I feel comfortable with someone. I have to have time to myself or I get cranky and out of sorts. But when hubby needs time to himself, I often wonder if he's mad at me?? *wondering out loud* is it possible to be a mix of INFP and ENFP?

I did this a lot when younger-I think many ENFPs do this. If someone around us acts differently we will see the change in the behavior-then we do the silly Ne thing where we go "Is it me? Did I do something? Are they mad at me?" 95% of the time, no it isnt me, so eventually I sort of just ignore that wierd little internal voice.
 

lunalove

New member
Joined
Mar 20, 2010
Messages
194
MBTI Type
ENF
Enneagram
6w5
That might be Fe vs. Fi or come down to self-esteem. Although, how do you mean "approval"? I think Lady X explained it well.

Are you familiar with the enneagram at all? I'm a 6w5 so I doubt myself constantly and look to others to affirm things. I assume, with the new info I am learning about extroverts, that 6's cannot be introverts. Having a 5 wing usually makes a 6 more introverted and less social and more ambiverted.

I do like outside perspective and to consider other points of view, but I tend to look inward mostly, and I use consultation to further narrow down options when I'm having trouble deciding. I think ENFPs are more likely to "think aloud" and INFPs will present their thoughts in a more finished form. Both will still bounce ideas off of people, but INFPs do more exploring in their head before voicing anything. The idea of the focus being inward or outward still stands though.

I tend to think out loud and need a sounding board to figure out what's going on in my head. I would like to be more independent and I am more so now (since learning about the enneagram), than I have ever been, but the bottom line is, I tend to look outward for support and re-assurance. This sounds like an extrovert to me...

Btw, Orange, thanks for your help. Seriously. You seem to have a firm grasp on these differences and I find your communication style helpful and invaluable :)
 

OrangeAppled

Sugar Hiccup
Joined
Mar 20, 2009
Messages
7,626
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
Are you familiar with the enneagram at all? I'm a 6w5 so I doubt myself constantly and look to others to affirm things. I assume, with the new info I am learning about extroverts, that 6's cannot be introverts. Having a 5 wing usually makes a 6 more introverted and less social and more ambiverted.

I tend to think out loud and need a sounding board to figure out what's going on in my head. I would like to be more independent and I am more so now (since learning about the enneagram), than I have ever been, but the bottom line is, I tend to look outward for support and re-assurance. This sounds like an extrovert to me...

Btw, Orange, thanks for your help. Seriously. You seem to have a firm grasp on these differences and I find your communication style helpful and invaluable :)


I am familiar with enneagram. I believe the 6 type is not uncommon for ISxJs, so introverts can be one.

Don't confuse dependency with extroversion either. Although, what you describe still sounds more extroverted to me.

My ISFJ mom needs a lot of reinforcement and seeks approval, but she doesn't think aloud that much. It's more that her judgment is swayed by consensus.
 

Laurie

Was E.laur
Joined
Jan 3, 2009
Messages
6,072
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
7w6
i said the same thing after i joined. i thought i was infp and then asked if i could just be both haha

i still sometimes wonder way down in there if i'm wrong...no clue why.

Sometimes I think you are too nice to be ENFP! But I don't think INFPs are nice either, so there is that.
 

Lady_X

Well-known member
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Oct 27, 2008
Messages
18,235
MBTI Type
ENFP
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784
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sx/sp
Sometimes I think you are too nice to be ENFP! But I don't think INFPs are nice either, so there is that.

oh what a funny thing to say! niceness surely isn't a type trait though is it?

but i don't know... random people just rarely piss me off but anyone that knows me well knows i have a quick temper and can be kind of awful. :blush:

i do have more fun when i'm happy and getting along with people though so i prefer that...umm...i guess everyone does haha
 

Laurie

Was E.laur
Joined
Jan 3, 2009
Messages
6,072
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
7w6
oh what a funny thing to say! niceness surely isn't a type trait though is it?

but i don't know... random people just rarely piss me off but anyone that knows me well knows i have a quick temper and can be kind of awful. :blush:

Oh, then feel free to remain ENFP. :newwink:
 

Lady_X

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haha! is having a quick temper an enfp thing? i know my dad did...just like me...he would have a 2-5 min lil bitch fest and then be all done and happy again...i'm the exact same. :blush:

it really is kind of awful isn't it?
 

Forever_Jung

Active member
Joined
May 23, 2009
Messages
2,644
MBTI Type
ESFJ
haha! is having a quick temper an enfp thing? i know my dad did...just like me...he would have a 2-5 min lil bitch fest and then be all done and happy again...i'm the exact same. :blush:

it really is kind of awful isn't it?

Inferior Si?
 

Lady_X

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no clue...what do ya mean?
 

Forever_Jung

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May 23, 2009
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2,644
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ESFJ
no clue...what do ya mean?

Well INFP's tend to hold on to things a lot longer, because their Si is tertiary. ENFP's are all about the future because of Ne, and don't care about traditions and old stuff because of inferior Si. Hence the zaniness and lack of regard for societal norms sometimes. So I was thinking maybe you get over things faster because you don't dwell on the past, because of your inferior Si. :D
 

Thalassa

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Messages
25,183
MBTI Type
ISFP
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6w7
Instinctual Variant
sx
haha! is having a quick temper an enfp thing? i know my dad did...just like me...he would have a 2-5 min lil bitch fest and then be all done and happy again...i'm the exact same. :blush:

it really is kind of awful isn't it?

That is sooooo me.
 

Lady_X

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Well INFP's tend to hold on to things a lot longer, because their Si is tertiary. ENFP's are all about the future because of Ne, and don't care about traditions and old stuff because of inferior Si. Hence the zaniness and lack of regard for societal norms sometimes. So I was thinking maybe you get over things faster because you don't dwell on the past, because of your inferior Si. :D

oh sure...that makes sense and shit did it make you realize you're an infp? you changed back!
 

Thalassa

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sx
Well INFP's tend to hold on to things a lot longer, because their Si is tertiary. ENFP's are all about the future because of Ne, and don't care about traditions and old stuff because of inferior Si. Hence the zaniness and lack of regard for societal norms sometimes. So I was thinking maybe you get over things faster because you don't dwell on the past, because of your inferior Si. :D

I wonder, though, if ENFPs have a sense of nostalgia because of inferior Si, and a sense of "how things SHOULD be" and the fact that me and my life had nothing to do with that lingered with me into young adulthood.
 

sculpting

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haha! is having a quick temper an enfp thing? i know my dad did...just like me...he would have a 2-5 min lil bitch fest and then be all done and happy again...i'm the exact same. :blush:

it really is kind of awful isn't it?

I :wubbie: you. Seems to be innate. My enfp coworker the other day went ballistic in her office after several executives told her she couldnt make these hysterical videos to post on our website as they were not "professional". The enfp graphic artist does this some too-especially about his boss.

I wonder, though, if ENFPs have a sense of nostalgia because of inferior Si, and a sense of "how things SHOULD be" and the fact that me and my life had nothing to do with that lingered with me into young adulthood.

I have emotional attachments to really weird stuff-lots of old crap like marbles and furniture from my grandmom. I held on to the most dangerous strand of christmas lights in the universe-they were made in 1972-becuase they were my grandmom's. I also will avoid certain things if I associate them with unpleasent memories.

This one is really strange-I threw out my cheese grater after an entp boy made me very sad. This is weird.

But painful things or things that make me mad-like little thunderstorms-honestly I get so pulled forward by Ne, that I get over painful stuff really quickly.
 

gigi_xo

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Mar 4, 2010
Messages
376
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4w3
my extroversion also depends largely on my mood

happy= very extroverted

for example this weekend I met new friends and ran around campus drinking with them and holding their hands and claiming to be new girl soulmates forever


but if I'm not chipper, I'll barely be able to converse with people I actually like. I'll suffer in my Fi or find someone I trust and love completely.

but in the end, I do love interaction, and without it i get lonely/anxious. over interaction always energizes me, even if I dont THINK I'm in the mood for it.

i assume thats sorta the difference? since our types seem so close
 

gigi_xo

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4w3
Well INFP's tend to hold on to things a lot longer, because their Si is tertiary. ENFP's are all about the future because of Ne, and don't care about traditions and old stuff because of inferior Si. Hence the zaniness and lack of regard for societal norms sometimes. So I was thinking maybe you get over things faster because you don't dwell on the past, because of your inferior Si. :D


I dont know about this

I'm quite nostaligc, and letting go is difficult.

but I try to snap myself out of it by distracting myself with the future, or some adventure or another.

honestly: I'm always in the past or the future- just never the current moment. I must have a developed inferior Si?
 

niberrizbe25

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Mar 5, 2010
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MBTI Type
ENXP
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4/7
Nico says:

I dont think you should base the distiction between being an INFP and ENFP on your level of social interaction. After all there is a high digree of things that influence social saviness. Sure having external intuition can be like having an extra claf muscle, useful for running that marathon, but in reality a healthy internal feeling user can magnetize others with their values. I think the main factor there would be the coinfidence to act accordingly to ones own inpulses.
On thing that I think diverges the INFP from the ENFP is how much they each are influeced by those they care about. The INFP will have a harder time waving away the expectations of others, while the ENFP, although more concerned about this than its thinking couterpart (ENTP,) will have an easier time acting accordingly to theitr own impulses. This can give the impression that the INFP is an impressionable pushover, but it only means that they are more genuienly touched by the opinions of others.
Also the ENFP will have an easier time getting past emotional injuries; they live in a world of Ne possibilities and dont like to be anchored by resentment. INFP on the other hand will be more likely to play the issue in their minds over and over again until they can make sense of their emotional turmoil. So the INFP are more likely to digest their unpleasant feelings, while the ENFP is more likely to vomit them.

Either way both types are great! Some of the most genuine people you will ever meet. always happy to meet more ENFPs and INFPs!
:yes::yes::yes:
 

OrangeAppled

Sugar Hiccup
Joined
Mar 20, 2009
Messages
7,626
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INFP
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4w5
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sp/sx
On thing that I think diverges the INFP from the ENFP is how much they each are influeced by those they care about. The INFP will have a harder time waving away the expectations of others, while the ENFP, although more concerned about this than its thinking couterpart (ENTP,) will have an easier time acting accordingly to theitr own impulses. This can give the impression that the INFP is an impressionable pushover, but it only means that they are more genuienly touched by the opinions of others.

Eh.... Fi is pretty individualistic. I think autonomy is pretty important to most Fi-doms. An INFP will respect your opinions & not always find it necessary to assert their own, but that doesn't mean they agree with you or are influenced by you.
 

Laurie

Was E.laur
Joined
Jan 3, 2009
Messages
6,072
MBTI Type
ENFP
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7w6
I have emotional attachments to really weird stuff-lots of old crap like marbles and furniture from my grandmom. I held on to the most dangerous strand of christmas lights in the universe-they were made in 1972-becuase they were my grandmom's. I also will avoid certain things if I associate them with unpleasent memories.

Yes, and I tend to feel some "traditions" are important that most other people don't, while ignoring "traditions" that other people think are important.

(This was the post of mine that got lost this morning! I said it better then though :( )
 
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