BerberElla
12 and a half weeks
- Joined
- Sep 25, 2008
- Messages
- 2,725
- MBTI Type
- infp
Looking to hear from both INFP's and ENFP's.
Lets say you are 18 going on 19, you have been living with an older sibling for over a year. During this time you have not been in a position to provide for yourself, which means you have been relying on this sibling for food, clothing, shelter, spending money etc. Even though this sibling has 3 children already and is struggling to make ends meet anyway.
Not only that, but for that entire year your efforts to get a job or make some kind of plan for the future has been next to non existant or minimal at best.
This older sibling cracks and tells you:
1 - You have 3 months to show an improvement in regards to trying to get a job, ie a visual change or you are out.
2 - When you get that job, you need to provide some money towards your share of things instead of relying on the sibling anymore.
3 - You have 6 months from getting the job to move out.
Is this rude?
Would you feel offended or would you honestly understand the motivating factors and forgive me for being "harsh"?
Is there a better way to approach this?
I have tried being silently supportive, but that has led to a year of mooching off of me with no effort to improve.
I feel like being nice is only making things worse.
Lets say you are 18 going on 19, you have been living with an older sibling for over a year. During this time you have not been in a position to provide for yourself, which means you have been relying on this sibling for food, clothing, shelter, spending money etc. Even though this sibling has 3 children already and is struggling to make ends meet anyway.
Not only that, but for that entire year your efforts to get a job or make some kind of plan for the future has been next to non existant or minimal at best.
This older sibling cracks and tells you:
1 - You have 3 months to show an improvement in regards to trying to get a job, ie a visual change or you are out.
2 - When you get that job, you need to provide some money towards your share of things instead of relying on the sibling anymore.
3 - You have 6 months from getting the job to move out.
Is this rude?
Would you feel offended or would you honestly understand the motivating factors and forgive me for being "harsh"?
Is there a better way to approach this?
I have tried being silently supportive, but that has led to a year of mooching off of me with no effort to improve.
I feel like being nice is only making things worse.