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[MBTI General] Working in a restaurant

Grace

New member
Joined
Aug 13, 2009
Messages
426
MBTI Type
INTJ
Is anyone here a server? If so, what is your type and how do you like it? Specifically, I have noticed that most of the other servers (who are primarily girls) seem to be S's. I have been a waitress for the past four years so I am fairly good at it now but it definitely does not come naturally to me. I was wondering if any other N's or NF's have this problem. It is hard for me to multi-task in my head. I have to write everything down. The girls who do the best seem to be SJ's of some sort (in my own experience). For all the servers on here (doesn't have to be NF), do you feel like you are good at your job? Do you like it?
 

murkrow

Branded with Satan
Joined
Jul 19, 2008
Messages
1,635
MBTI Type
INTJ
I've worked in a lot of restaurants but always in the kitchen.

I fucking hate waitresses.

They're almost all S, yeah.

And not smart Ss either.
 

Colors

The Destroyer
Joined
Apr 24, 2007
Messages
1,276
MBTI Type
ISTP
Enneagram
5w4
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
You had to work to be good at it, who says that they don't work at it too?
 

murkrow

Branded with Satan
Joined
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Messages
1,635
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INTJ
If they had to work at it then they worked so hard that it's become their persona 24/7.

Fucking waitresses.
 

Colors

The Destroyer
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Grace

New member
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Aug 13, 2009
Messages
426
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INTJ
You had to work to be good at it, who says that they don't work at it too?

Perhaps they work at it too but it is an obvious difference, in my opinion, between how I am compared to how most of the other girls are. Lots of them don't write things down and they pick up on it a lot faster than I did when I was first starting out, etc. I am friends with an INFP who I work with and she is notably not on the same level as many of the other servers. She gets flustered easily and can't take as large of sections. Not saying that is how all N's/NF's would be. I have limited experience with working with other NFs in restaurants so that is why I was curious as to how others feel about being a server.
 

2XtremeENFP

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Jul 23, 2008
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446
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i am an ENFP and I am a server as well. I most definitely have to make an effort to do well. I am the same way, I do get flustered easily and I have to write everything down. I also make STUPID mistakes all the time (thank Goodness the kitchen staff likes me!). My 'spontaneous-side' goes out the window while I am serving. I feel the need to have everything organized and do things by the book, which, while you are serving, takes LOTS of time, so I am always trying to do the 'right thing', but also try new ways to do it, which also makes me waste time while I am experimenting.

I have horrible Si, so I cannot remember anything on the menu, so I hardly have anything memorized.

Along with this, I am horrible at making 'small-talk' at my tables, I run out of things to talk about and then I awkwardly stand there haha.

Now that I think of it, maybe I should quit!

I do make good tips and I think people like me because I am very kind and nice no matter what the circumstance is, but, I do agree with you, Grace, I find that S's are MUCH better servers than NFs.

I work with a guy who is an ESTP and he is great with his tables.
 

Fidelia

Iron Maiden
Staff member
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May 31, 2009
Messages
14,497
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INFJ
I am not very spacially aware of my surroundings and I don't do well in those kind of settings that require lots of practical attention to what is going on, quick decision making, coordination and dealing with groups of people in that context. I think INFJs have to work at it a lot harder than a lot of other S types.

(As an aside, I always marvelled at those spy movie situations where the person got a complicated set of instructions, simply nodded and went off and accomplished it all. I'd be like, "Wait, could you repeat that?...Actually I'd better write it down too (not so good as a spy)"...And then I'd discover that I had washed the instructions in my pants pocket by accident or something even then. Never mind the physical coordination requirement.)
 

hermeticdancer

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Oct 9, 2008
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209
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eNFp
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Same goes for nursing, most are S's.
If you can make a good waitress. You can make a good nurse!
That is why I dislike nursing, and this is before the boom started and everyone and their brother started becoming a nurse.

I still hate nursing, and I also suck as a waitress, I would rather wash dishes, or be a deli cook. Maybe a can can dancer. That way I could disassociate and not have to interact with people and be fake.
 

Thalassa

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May 3, 2009
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I waitressed. I was good at it. I often could memorize stuff instead of just writing it down. The key is schmoozing, just like being any other sales person. I also liked being active.

I had a really hard time, though, as an NF handling the people stress of it. Like, if someone made me mad or I just got overwhelmed, it was really hard on me mentally/emotionally. I loved the camraderie of waiting tables, too, the way you can joke around with your co-workers and such.

The most frustrating part for me was working for "idiots," thinking that I was smarter than some of my supervisors...possible N prejudice there.
 

Thalassa

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Same goes for nursing, most are S's.
If you can make a good waitress. You can make a good nurse!
That is why I dislike nursing, and this is before the boom started and everyone and their brother started becoming a nurse.

I still hate nursing, and I also suck as a waitress, I would rather wash dishes, or be a deli cook. Maybe a can can dancer. That way I could disassociate and not have to interact with people and be fake.

Being a dancer involved dissociation, but the best way to make money is actually to have people skills. It's like the ultimate in customer service. I used to feel like a therapist sometimes.

You should try it though. It isn't bad: it's kind of creative and you get plenty of attention.
 

the state i am in

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i was a lot better once i realized that if i used my eyes to look around, i would know what was going on better than if i didn't.

i think it's definitely not natural, and working just feels stressful in so many contexts, but infjs can do it pretty easily if they learn to use Fe. it still feels false at times, some more than others, when you're not perfectly hitting the ball in the weighty part of the bat. or if you have bad luck and your tables are disgusting and horrifying and pathetic people. in a decent establishment, it's high price/performance.

it's good Fe and Se practice. it's also a great way to meet people, granted, especially at shitty jobs, most of the people are S types, but many of the best people i know i've met at a restaurant.
 

Charmed Justice

Nickle Iron Silicone
Joined
Jul 22, 2009
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2,805
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I was a horrible waitress. I wasn't coordinated enough, didn't remember the menu under pressure, and just generally felt awkward. Although, one girl there, the only confirmed ENFP I'm aware that I've known(I always forget about her!), was one of the best servers. As for the rest, the best seemed like ESXPs, and I was one badass hostess.:laugh:
 

Lux

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1,458
I worked as a server for years. I actually enjoyed it, and I was good at it. I didn't start out good though, but I was really young when I was hired. I got better over the years. It may have been easier for me because I have strong auditory recollection skills, and could usually remember word for word what people said, so I'd just replay it in my head. Plus, I thought serving was fun. I really actually enjoyed it when it got busy. I remember turning my job as a server into a dance in my head. I had all of the movements down. I also found that if you can somehow make your table like you, any mistakes you make are usually forgiven. The best tip I can give you is to have the kitchen staff really like you. They're life savers if you do make a mistake :).
 

Betty Blue

Let me count the ways
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Is anyone here a server? If so, what is your type and how do you like it? Specifically, I have noticed that most of the other servers (who are primarily girls) seem to be S's. I have been a waitress for the past four years so I am fairly good at it now but it definitely does not come naturally to me. I was wondering if any other N's or NF's have this problem. It is hard for me to multi-task in my head. I have to write everything down. The girls who do the best seem to be SJ's of some sort (in my own experience). For all the servers on here (doesn't have to be NF), do you feel like you are good at your job? Do you like it?

I waitressed for many years and loved it, the problems started when i went into management, i always felt like a dictator. Waitressing for me was fun and for some reason i memorised everything, i even won bets on it with customers (ones with too much money) and won bottles of posh champagne etc. To be honest i couldn't have cared less about the posh champagne, it was all just a fun game. The only problems whilst waitressing were the rude customers...Bump and spill girls, bump and spill:cheese:
In saying all this i never stayed at one place longer than a few months, i always needed change.
 

SilkRoad

Lay the coin on my tongue
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May 26, 2009
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Well, a variety of responses here so it may not be entirely type related but it does sound like SPs would have an easier time than NFs. Certainly an easier time than INFs! I have never worked as a waitress but just being in a busy restaurant makes me know it would be a nightmare for me. I am pretty sure I would be exhausted and stressed all the time. I don't like lots of people making non-stop "this instant" kind of demands all the time. I did waitress once in a sort of restaurant thingy my class did when I was eleven and right then I decided I could never do it for real!!

I know there are plenty of waiters/waitresses who are crap but the ones who do it well get my admiration!
 

Eckhart

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Jan 6, 2010
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???
Woah, being waiter would be probably one of my nightmare jobs. I can already see me regularly dropping things, forgetting things, being at least twice as slow as all others, getting nervous about every shit and of course about all that interaction with strangers. All the stress and so many people around would drain me. Alternatively I would be frustrated about myself and look arrogant to other people then. Then after some time I loose the job I guess :/

I also think that is a place which is way better outfilled by SP / SJ, preferably extroverted people. Though I can imagine that a very healthy INFP (not all are that broken as me) would be doing the job good also. Women have maybe a better chance in it too, most male guests probably are more patient with them :p
 

Fidelia

Iron Maiden
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May 31, 2009
Messages
14,497
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I'd like the chatting part of the job and the parts that require Fe. However, I think it could be an overload emotionally of being aware of all the staff and customers different feelings and balancing them. I tend to put on highest priority whoever is there and bothering me.
 

Grace

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Aug 13, 2009
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INTJ
I definitely respect all of the people who do the job well because, in my opinion, it can be very tough sometimes. I could never, in a million years, be a bartender. That is way out of my league.
 
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