[ENFP] ENFP are we annoying? Be honest. What do you really think?

[SillySapienne]

How are ENFP's annoying?

(1) ENFP's exaggerate everything. Sometimes, I am reasonable in stating that it is no more an exaggeration, but a lie. (3 dogs is not equal to 5 dogs)

False, don't confuse our enthusiasm for exaggeration, we have INTEGRITY, I tell it like it is, period.

(2) ENFP's flirt with everyone. They will flirt with you until they are bored, and then, move on to the next subject. Therfore, all of the promises they make are usually flaky.

I can see how people can perceive us to be this way, yes, we are flirtatious, yes, we can be very flaky, but we have good intentions, and how is it our fault that we are deeply interested in deep and interesting people!!!

(3) ENFP's will do almost anything (or say anything) to please others.

Kinda true, le sigh, this is somewhat of a flaw of mine, at least, if I care about you, I will most likely put your needs before mine, working on this though.

(4) ENFP's are so convinced about a certain "truth" that they will refuse to acknowledge that they are wrong. Thus, they are dogmatic in their beliefs.

I am dogmatic to an extent in some of my strong beliefs, but I will ALWAYS concede when I am, in fact, wrong, I never want to be "right" I just want to understand things, from all perspectives/sides/angles, I want to get as close as I can to ascertaining the Truth

(5) ENFP's think they know what's best for you.

Can be true, I think this, but I won't impose it, if that makes sense.

(6) ENFP's are always talking.

FALSE!!! UGH!!! BIGGEST FUCKING MISCONCEPTION!!!

I am a great listener, an active listener, I care to get to know you, and understand what you're thinking/feeling, and how do I accomplish this?

By listening, and asking pertinent questions.

In all of my close relationships, romantic and platonic, my partners do most of the talking.

 

[Moiety]

(1) ENFP's exaggerate everything. Sometimes, I am reasonable in stating that it is no more an exaggeration, but a lie. (3 dogs is not equal to 5 dogs)

False, don't confuse our enthusiasm for exaggeration, we have INTEGRITY, I tell it like it is, period.

(2) ENFP's flirt with everyone. They will flirt with you until they are bored, and then, move on to the next subject. Therfore, all of the promises they make are usually flaky.

I can see how people can perceive us to be this way, yes, we are flirtatious, yes, we can be very flaky, but we have good intentions, and how is it our fault that we are deeply interested in deep and interesting people!!!

(3) ENFP's will do almost anything (or say anything) to please others.

Kinda true, le sigh, this is somewhat of a flaw of mine, at least, if I care about you, I will most likely put your needs before mine, working on this though.

Personally disagree on all three accounts, as far as this ENFP is concerned anyway. The one problem I have when communicating is exaggeration actually, because I have problem quantifying. No one would call me flirtatious and no would think I'd go to any sort of length to please other people lol

 

[SillySapienne]

^ You also have a penis, so.....

 

[Moiety]

^ You also have a penis, so.....

Hmm, my research seems to show that is not the reason why though. ENFP guys seem to be smooth talkers. I'm as smooth as a truck carrying cement. They also seem to be more on the charismatic side than I am. I think it's because I can be quite cynical.

But yeah, wasn't making some huge statement here. I'm just lazy to read through the whole thread and come up with my own words, so I just quoted the first post I saw and disagreed in good contrarian style

(are ENFPs usually contrarian I wonder...)

 

[Amargith]

For me it's about finding limits. I like seeing where people's lines are drawn. It tells me a lot about their character real fast.

I must've driven him mad the first two months then when I refused to even let him go near my buttons. Anything he tossed at me, I deflected and played the mystery demure girl. At some point I started at times tossing out things and still clamming up...that seemed to really confuse him (and embarass me ). Nowadays, I can see he *loves* me just reacting to him pushing things he *knows* I'm likely to respond to, so I react extra feisty....he seems to love the drama and I enjoy putting a big smile on his face

 

[copperfish17]

To OP: Well, I have known both mature and immature ENFP's in my life. The mature ones are great. The immature ones are the bane of my life.

One mature ENFP I know IRL is one of the most unjudgemental and enthusiastic person I have ever known. She's very open-minded - I can talk to her about virtually anything.

That said, here are some things about immature ENFP's I know IRL that annoys me:

- Unable to tell things like they REALLY are (cannot separate facts from their feelings)
- Twists facts and is UNAWARE of it.
- Often delusional
- Overemotional
- Unable to comprehend/intolerant of impersonal reasoning
- Obnoxiously loud
- Tendency to believe their/their friends' opinion = everyone else's opinion
- Somewhat bipolar
- Projects their own emotions on others

Take everything with a grain of salt.

 

[Arthur Schopenhauer]

^ THIS.

 

[sculpting]

((6) ENFP's are always talking.

FALSE!!! UGH!!! BIGGEST FUCKING MISCONCEPTION!!!

I am a great listener, an active listener, I care to get to know you, and understand what you're thinking/feeling, and how do I accomplish this?

By listening, and asking pertinent questions.

In all of my close relationships, romantic and platonic, my partners do most of the talking.

Oh, I am actually guilty of this one-I think aloud far too much. This is an area I am working on very strongly. But I dont flirt-it makes me feel icky and I actually will go in the face of the opinions of others-bluntly.

Maybe the one that bugged me the most was "Know what is best for others". I do not do that. I do give advice but I often want people to grow into what makes THEM happy-not me, thus my suggestions may not help them in that manner.

My worst problem right now is communication at work. I am too blunt, too likely to openly disagree with the lack of logic in another's idea, and too impatient to listen to them ramble on. I get very frustrated with the inability of others to see the big picture and anticipate logistical flaws. I will cut them off, tell them what the plan is and then put the plan into action. I then drive for implementation. However I can come across as an arrogant bitch when in this mode. The right answer is so very obvious most days.

The Te users love me, but the Fe users think I am "reactive".

 

[RobinsonCrusoe]

Are ENFPs annoying?

Yea, the immature ones are. But it's because being an ENFP is like having an awesome super-power...and the little ones just don't know how to focus it yet. That's why it ends up hurting those around them because they haven't learned how to properly channel all that crazy power.

But when they mature and understand how to control themselves and properly calibrate the situation, they become weapons of mass awesomeness.

i've seen some older enfp's who've brought their powers under control. wherever they go, they're like the light that all the moths can't help but be attracted to...even if it might kill them

 

[Poki]

I must've driven him mad the first two months then when I refused to even let him go near my buttons. Anything he tossed at me, I deflected and played the mystery demure girl. At some point I started at times tossing out things and still clamming up...that seemed to really confuse him (and embarass me ). Nowadays, I can see he *loves* me just reacting to him pushing things he *knows* I'm likely to respond to, so I react extra feisty....he seems to love the drama and I enjoy putting a big smile on his face

We key off the clamming up as well. We key off of everything whether its what you said, what you didnt say, an expression, lack of expression, we are aloof like no tomorrow when it comes to what we notice

Its fun playing with Ne because they will do things to investigate what they pick up with Ne

 

[TheZEDMan]

ENFPs are flaky. That's my biggest complaint. But from the forums, I understand why they are flaky, and I totally love them anyway.

NFPs are like cats. You can't expect their affection. They don't come when called. They aren't going to follow your orders. But if they love you...they will come 'round every once and awhile and purr by your leg...even jump up on top of your shoulders if you're sitting and do the same...it's moments like that, that make me absoleutely love NFPs. Unconditionally. You guys rock!

Wow, WTF, I'm supposed to be ENFP (I'm kind of an in-between personality), but I'm 100% opposite, I'm like a dog, always down for a little touchy-feely (it's my favorite love language ), in fact, I loooooooove dogs because they are also touchy-feely, you just pet them and they like it (sort of like me, woof wooooof I need attention and affection, too! hehehe )

 

[SillySapienne]

That said, here are some things about immature ENFP's I know IRL that annoys me:

- Unable to tell things like they REALLY are (cannot separate facts from their feelings)
- Twists facts and is UNAWARE of it.
- Often delusional
- Overemotional
- Unable to comprehend/intolerant of impersonal reasoning
- Obnoxiously loud
- Tendency to believe their/their friends' opinion = everyone else's opinion
- Somewhat bipolar
- Projects their own emotions on others

Take everything with a grain of salt.

The above qualities apply to ALL unhealthy EFs, period, and some none EFs, too.

 

[copperfish17]

The above qualities apply to ALL unhealthy EFs, period, and some none EFs, too.

True.

 

[MattL]

I agree with most people that have already posted on here saying ENFP's are flaky, but that's about all. The only other thing is, is that they can be annoying at times, but I'm an introvert so that might just be me. Other than that ENFP's are generally nice people, listen more than others and are really good friends. Nice to be around them, but for me, only in small doses

*edit*
Just realized this post is 5 years old... lol. Have a nice day

 

[ScareBear]

Well, this I guess explains why my supposed friends in middle school thought I was annoying cause I probably was :/ I've chilled down since then (having people tell you they were only your friend cause they felt sorry for you stings and at a young age kinda leaves a lasting effect). I'm probably still annoying as an adult though. I should ask people...

 

[Nico_D]

The only annoying thing about you guys is that when you say you'll get back to it you never do. You have so much on your plate that you can feel distant to me while you think you're 100 % in.

 

[ScareBear]

The only annoying thing about you guys is that when you say you'll get back to it you never do. You have so much on your plate that you can feel distant to me while you think you're 100 % in.

We'll work on that and get back to you ;P

 

[Nico_D]

We'll work on that and get back to you ;P

Okay. I'll wait patiently for your answer.

 

[aanule]

The only annoying thing about you guys is that when you say you'll get back to it you never do. You have so much on your plate that you can feel distant to me while you think you're 100 % in.

Guilty as charged.

 

[ceecee]

The only annoying thing about you guys is that when you say you'll get back to it you never do. You have so much on your plate that you can feel distant to me while you think you're 100 % in.

I would agree with that. It's like you have to tell them - LOOK AT ME WHEN I'M TALKING TO YOU!!! I've said that more than once to my two ENFP friends. I think sometimes, you have to bust up that bubble of easily distracted but that's not even a guarantee that they'll listen. Hear you, maybe. Returning calls is a total waste of time - text them or you could never hear from them until June, four years from now. I love my ENFP's but damn, they can be a pain in the ass.