[INFP] In praise of INFP's

[Lady_X]

what...why?

 

[Nihilen]

CAUSE HE SAID SO

 

[Deployed Imagination]

Based on the 3 INFPs I know, they are:

1. Quiet, hate drawing attention to themselves, despise exhibitionism and would never post their photos on the internet

Weirdly i am very capable of fitting this description the majority of the time, but at the same time can be completely the opposite

2. Hard-working, very INTUITIVE, love all different personality types and doesn't despise any particular type and instead look for commonalities instead of differences--being that they are HARMONIZER-CLARIFIERS.

hard working? lol, well yeah if it interests me, then ill work harder than anyone else, possibly due to the thought that nothing i find interesting or that captivates me could ever be considered work. i am a great fan of people of all different types, and they are my favourite subject although many i find i have already 'worked out' in seconds of meeting them, even people i should really not be fond of i can still sympathise with why they act the way they do and find forgiveness isnt a choice, its just something that always happens


3. Drawn towards helping people- especially psychology, where they want to make a difference and like exploring emotions to great depths and want feedback just as much about their relationships

So very true, i can become completely sidetracked with whats going on for everyone else around me, even to the degree that the consequential affect my actions might potentially have on others will sway my decision making process

4. In a group of people, an INFP is usually the right-hand man or the best girlfriend and prefer being out of the spotlight

i find this one very accurate in ways and not so much in others, because when im on a high i unintentionally become the centre of attention, therefore from then onwards people who experienced that side of me couldnt even begin to comprehend the 'me' i spend every day with, the introverted persona

therefore i am very selective about when , where and who i spend time with, having a birthday party would be impossible trying to combine all the different people i have contact with and worrying about whether they are ok or not

so the other side to this, is there are people who have no real idea of what i am really like ( fair enough because i am still tryin to work that out myself) although they may consider us to be close, so in those situations i never go below my surface and if it happens to be a day when i want to be alone, then i am and they remain none the wiser

5. They usually can see the positive aspects in everybody, including the people they don't like

As mentioned before, this is very true. Its often the case i find myself identifying positives in people they can not see in themselves and i take great satisfaction from making somebody feel better about themselves


6. Prefer to spend time to themselves unless with other INFPs/INFJs.

i know a lot of people and have a lot of aquaintences, but still there is only a very few people i even manage to feel comfortable around. Even they tell me im evasive and feel a distance they cant ever close, which is a shame and does create the loneliness im more than acustomed to, but still somehow prefer...

mainly due to severe anxiety and suffering regular and instantaneous panic attacks, i find being alone at home far less stressful than venturing outside where i everything i get involved with massively fails and provides a lot of disapointment or crashes and burns through miscommunication or fear of opening up and becoming really involved in things i cant just up and walk away from

7. Usually prefer a mate whom they can help/ fix emotionally.

i couldnt disagree with this, although my kind of people are spontaneous and focused, or just fun and easy going

8. In a mate, they're drawn towards significant others who are good at business and getting things done, being that they have a lack of practical skills, and acting in the moment generally.

wouldnt say in a mate if thats meant in the sense of a partner or significant other, but i can not deny i find comfort in knowing i have a logical brain to refer back to in times of decision, mainly due to the fact i will always act there and then at the time usually carelessly and pressured, whereas if i have a good amount of time for comtemplation before a scheduled event etc, then i probably make myself so anxious i avoid it when the time comes anyway

9. Very careful about family planning and choose their mates carefully and would never do anything rash without thinking a great deal ahead of time (especially when it comes to having children, where to send them to school etc).

so true, iv met some seriously beautiful women in my time and i always hope to settle with them and have plenty of children, care for them past the point of explanation, but as experiences are beginning to prove, i get to a certain point, realise they arent exactly who im after, or just end up besotted with the persona i have provided for them to see that, they get ever further away from who i really am and what i really feel, which of course is my natural inclination to not allow that to surface, then miss them forever afterwards wondering what if?

10. Musically inclined.

absolutley, my music is enough for me in itself,

its my life, i eat sleep and breathe it, its like it massages my brain and i use it as a form of communication in as many ways as possible

weirdly , my involvement with music has bought me a lot of attention that has been very hard to accept and deal with, opened up many doors and started many new ' friendships '. so stupid because my dream is like ever closer and its just surreal how fast its happened, like i have a talent i have only just realised after all these years of complete mess and confusion, hurt and isolation

My first post on here and quite an open one for me, i have found over the last month or so after discovering that i do seem to meet every criterior for the infp personality type, that these boards and the topics of discussion have really helped me and given me some sort of confidence i have never had before

so nice to know i am not the only one now and that if i work on what i struggle with i can be successful, also the realisation that i am not completely bananas has helped a lot

i often find that if i do let out my thoughts to others, it usually completely baffles them, has them laughing histerically or wanting my children, quite a strange combination and considering i have often comtemplated ending it all, its been really nice to settle down a bit in the knowledge that there does seem to be quite a significant amount of others out there that would be quite understanding of what i always referred to as my 'oddness', its a comfort, just wish i knew where they were all hiding

Bit of a ramble there i must admit, just finding such a centrepoint of so many similar minded people is incredible,and i although i do spend a lot more time reading the forums than i do getting actively involved, i would just like to say thank you to everyone for all their contributions to these discussions because it really has been like finding a new bulb for the light at the end of the tunnel, i have often been told theres one there but it never seemed to be on for me before this discovery

thanks ;-)

DI

 

[Wild horses]

Love you INFPs so I thought I'd drop by and say so!!!

 

[Lady_X]

 

[bronte]

thanks substitute

thanks for this thread - this is wonderful stuff- I saw your thread on istps too - I'm married to one and so related to all of that - spcially the drunken emotions bit - I ply him with beer regularly - he is also histerical when drunk!! Thanks for appreciating us introverted souls!

 

[TCrusher]

Awesome Thread!

I actually find this thread by searching on google! What a great thread...Like a lot of other people I have found that once you start to understand and embrace who you are, it makes life much better! Although it is hard to give yourself any credit if you are an INFP! Anyway, this is a great thread and made me feel really happy!!

Hope everyone is having a good/night morning. Whatever it may be where you are all at. =)

 

[ragashree]

I can tell INFP's have taken up reading this thread for personal solace and affirmation when I see the extraordinary post/viewing ratio of about 1:100. Surely this is the most impressively skewed on the site?

 

[sade]

I like INFPs also, especially their company since they make me feel comfortable.
I like that you don't push me but let my also introverted self, just talk when I want to, and stand me when I sometimes get cranky (more like a killer mood, but you get the point).

 

[quietmusician]

Thanks for the praise. It's always nice to be loved.

 

[superkumquat]

thanks for the love

 

[briochick]

I just want to start a thread in praise of INFP's because it's just hit me again today (as it never ceases to do) how much they kick ass.

They're like the best of both worlds - they're introverts who are fun, adventurous, spontaneous and enthusiastic about people, and feelers who understand needing space and not smothering people. They're gracious and humble in victory and generous in defeat. They're relaxed and laid-back P's who also know how to step up their act so as not to disappoint others or fail them. They're sensitive and gentle leaders and reliable, hard working followers. They're just as smart as INTP's but less work because they have better social skills! (sorry INTP's, but you know it's true... lol) They totally rock!



So let's hear it for INFP's, and feel free to chime in with your own words of praise.

 

[MrME]

I think they're awesome.

Two of my best friends are INFP.

 

[The Outsider]

This thread is so sweet.

 

[DigitalMethod]

Their avatar's are pretty much always awesome.

 

[Stanton Moore]

Truly, this thread warms my heart.

Thank you.

 

[Stanton Moore]

Hello, I don't know why and I'd like to see what other INFPs think about this:
1)Whenever you are complimented you hold on to it so dearly as you know the outside world is your only source of affection. You are literally unable to love yourself and can always find something wrong somewhere.You feel that you are never good enough and when people actually show appreciation you dismiss it judging it "false" or that the person "doesn't know you yet".You think most people you meet do hate you deeply.
2) Some point in your life people close to you told you you were "bad". My mother told me I was the most difficult kid in the house and everyone I know closely thinks I have a nasty temper/moody and hate company.(which is true) but for some reason this haunted me and I always saw myself as the evil bitch since then....
3)I genuinely want to help people, make them feel better, making them happy makes my day...however I fail to follow up (as I get distracted easily) on the "good whims" and people think I lie.
4)Although I cannot stand myself, hearing it from someone else's mouth drives me into a quick,obsessive and I will not stop bashing until I feel better.
5)The qualities I think I possess are not exactly something to be proud of:
- good abilities at making someone who hurt me feel worse than I do.(yeah..."dissing" basically..honestly except that and random "generosity"(I just felt like helping you I see no qualities that in themselves are genuinely good)
6)Suffering from an inferiority complex, I act very confident and come off as aggressive yet if people get to me...I don't get back up.
8)I just idolize people I like, blind to their flaws.
9)Disregard for any kind of authority, when i was younger I'd go out of my way to be neutral in my conversation so I'd never show any sign of respect to my teachers,etc...
10)I assume I am unlikable and "disgusting" so I auto-exclude myself and no matter what people say it's only if I am confident in something I do that I am able to get work done, praise is meaningless unless sincere(1% of the time)
Can anyone relate?I am not trying to throw myself a pity party I hate pity parties. I just wanted to know if INFP can relate..I'm unsure of being an infp...I can relate to many types actually so I'm confused.

I can relate to almost all of this. I'm truly sorry that you too have to experience this level of alienation.
I may be a bit older than you, so believe me when I say: hang in there. Things will get better. I have grown into many of my INFP traights; most of which I used to utterly hate.
One thing I will add to you list: despite all of those negative, and self-destructive emotions, I have always felt that there is a special person at my core. I suspect that you might say the same, when you are feeling good and positive. I now know that I have a special role to play in the lives of others, and that it is appreciated, if not always acknowledged.
This thread is part of that too. It's nice to feel appreciated.

 

[Dwigie]

I can relate to almost all of this. I'm truly sorry that you too have to experience this level of alienation.
I may be a bit older than you, so believe me when I say: hang in there. Things will get better. I have grown into many of my INFP traights; most of which I used to utterly hate.
One thing I will add to you list: despite all of those negative, and self-destructive emotions, I have always felt that there is a special person at my core. I suspect that you might say the same, when you are feeling good and positive. I now know that I have a special role to play in the lives of others, and that it is appreciated, if not always acknowledged.
This thread is part of that too. It's nice to feel appreciated.

Hm, I still feel that way to some extent but I am aware that I have a pretty nice "loving network" now and I'm less harsher on myself. Things are looking slightly better and I'm hanging in there too. Aw, I this thread.

 

[DigitalMethod]

I their passion.

 

[something boring]

I

them, too. One of my best friends is one. Doesn't sound as cool as two.