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[NF] NFs would you mind if I ask you something "personal" ?

RogueBlue

New member
Joined
Apr 28, 2010
Messages
4
MBTI Type
INFJ
-- How do you pick emotions of other people ?

I don't actually pick them, they just come to you. Hard to verbalise! You don't look at something to see a particular colour, you see the colour it is!! Body language and voice help, but they more support what you feel about them rather than be the initial indicator to what you feel.


-- Do you understand what the person is feeling right away?

I get a very good hunch straight away. The more time I spend with them, the more the complexity of the feeling is revealed...


-- I am wondering if you try to determine this piece of information by "default" or it taks a conscious action to do this ?

It is not a conscious action, the more conscious of it I am, the more I will over think/analyse and go off on tangents... but the more relaxed I am the more I feel...


-- Also if someone asks you how many emotions do you recognize what would you say as an answer ?

How many colours are there??
 

yvonne

A passer by
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Mar 1, 2010
Messages
534
MBTI Type
INfP
Enneagram
5w4
How do you pick emotions of other people ?


In theory this is something in what NFs are suppose to be great at. So I am wondering how this works. Do you understand what the person is feeling right away? (like you should in online tests)
Or it is more likely that you will slowly have to figure it out through a body language/voice or somethinng like that ?

i suppose it's a combination of what you mentioned... you make less misjudgements with people you know well. it's a delicate matter, so it's not wise to jump into conclusions, but only use your intuition to possibly open the lines of communication (the way you do it is also important)... the more you have had experiences with different kinds of people and the more understanding you have about yourself and people in general helps a great deal... (goes without saying that mistakes are made)

I am wondering if you try to determine this piece of information by "default" or it taks a conscious action to do this ? (or it depends)

it always takes a concious action for me. i am concious about "feeling" people.

Also if someone asks you how many emotions do you recognize what would you say as an answer ?

many, but i suppose it's first just a negative, or a positive vibe...
 

Coriolis

Si vis pacem, para bellum
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Apr 18, 2010
Messages
27,230
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INTJ
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5w6
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
As an extension of the OP, do you (NFs) generally find it easier to read the emotions of some types relative to others, other circumstances being equal?
 

skittlesloli

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Apr 27, 2010
Messages
11
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ENFP
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2
1. Body language
2. Tone of voice
3. Words being used
4. Previous experience with the person and their reactions
5. Previous experience with someone similar and the other person's reactions compared.

As an ENFP I am better at figuring out relationships I'm not involved in. When they get close to me I have more trouble seeing the truth in the situation. I think that might be the Ne, Fi difference kicking in. (not sure, just a theory, don't know much about functions)

The people who are analyzing you might be having a similar issue depending on what NF they are. I'm not sure where the water gets muddied for other NFs.

eta: We just absorb it. It gets better over years of correctly or incorrectly absorbing data and changing the people model. It reminds me of algebra. Would you think twice to answer x + 3 = 7 as x = 4? Of course not. Even if it takes some thought it's just so built in it just happens.

How many emotions do I recognize? It's not about a number, it's about what someone is like. Cause and effect. It's bigger than just "that person is scared" - I need more data. Also, the interesting part isn't that they are scared or uncomfortable. It's why they are scared. Knowing someone is scared is just data, the interpretation is the fun stuff.
This pretty much sums it up for me. I mostly notice a vibe but I'm good at watching people's faces and body language.
I took psychology in high school and in college(only a term) so I think I use a lot of the knowledge from those classes as well to read people easier.
 

yvonne

A passer by
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Mar 1, 2010
Messages
534
MBTI Type
INfP
Enneagram
5w4
As an extension of the OP, do you (NFs) generally find it easier to read the emotions of some types relative to others, other circumstances being equal?

i suppose it directly correlates to what types of people i have had the most past experience with, or with whom i can identify better... feelings are universal, though, and people are people...
 

DanceLikeAdam

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Joined
Mar 17, 2010
Messages
4
MBTI Type
INFJ
As an INFJ, I'd say that I can feel emotions somewhat, and usually I'm pretty good at it. But I'm also not very confident in directly confronting it. Sometimes, I'm not even confident enough to believe it. I don't like assuming things that nobody has confirmed.

And this is something that just happens. I don't really have to try, but it needs to be retrieved. Does that make sense? I can't just know, I need to think about it a little bit.
 

Abstract Thinker

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Jun 3, 2010
Messages
323
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INFP
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4w5
First I pick up on the vibe as they approach. Then I feel the atmosphere immediately around them, which comes pretty easily for me (and I imagine most other INFPs). Then I watch the eyes -- there's much truth in there. Also tone of voice, plus the pace and intonation of speech, and even rate and depth of breathing.

Body language is good too, but for me it works much better if I know the person well. Sometimes with strangers it's hard to tell if it's simply posture and mannerisms, or if they're actually saying something with their body.

But the eyes rarely lie.

Don't know how I do it -- it has always been easy -- like they're broadcasting it for me.

If it's not like this for you, and you want to get better at it, maybe try to focus on these things with some people that you know well, when you know how they're feeling, and then apply it to others.

In my experience these physiological expressions are fairly universal.

EDIT: However, and to not misrepresent my powers of perception, if I'm trying to perceive the emotions of somebody else as it pertains to me, especially if the emotions are in any way negative, I become flustered, constantly thinking to myself... 'what did I do wrong?' or 'How can I fix it?' or 'What's wrong with me?' AND, 'I really didn't mean to hurt ANYONE, especially this person in front of me.'

Alas, the blessing/curse of the INFP(?)
 

Billy

Crazy Diamond
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Oct 20, 2009
Messages
1,192
MBTI Type
INFJ
body language, context of the situation, Ni is good here, it looks for single truths out of chaos, When I am around someone I am usually completely focused on them and not the environment, so I notice what theyre doing, saying, how they look, what kind of day theyre having, if they say something I look for extra meanings stuff like that, usually I can hit pretty close to home, but its not 100%
 

Quiet

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Mar 1, 2010
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282
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The way a person acts says a lot. I get hints from their behavior and expression. Also as I work in nursing, I look for signs of hunger, hydration, stress etc. As I listen to what a person says, I pay attention to the words and tone. After these have passed through my information intake, I then get a few ideas and go test out what kind of feeling in the air wraps around each possibility. I get a good idea of which one is correct and quite often I'm right. So, there is a feeling in the air, but for me it's second to noticing there is a more visual indication there's somthing up. For me it's just an unconcious process and is second nature.
 

kccrush

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Apr 23, 2010
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INFJ
Something that I've picked up on recently is as simple as noting how much eye contact someone has...I've noticed that a friend who feels dejected and seems to have lost touch with the world hasn't been keeping eye contact. I have a problem then knowing how far to probe. With some of my friends I know I can probe and get involved (ENFPs make this easy...) but with other people, you sense there's distrust and a wall. Recently, finding this in other people makes me turn around and shut off too. Unless I see a door open a little inviting discussion, I tend not to try to impose myself. Do other people have this same issue?
 

Talisyn

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May 29, 2010
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INFP
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9-1
Um, I feel peoples emotions. Like their energy. I could probably walk into a room with my eyes closed and tell you if the person were feeling positive or negative. Its definitely "default" and I'd turn it off often if I could. A negative mood rubs off on me at home. Even if I'm in a super mood. How many emotions do i recognize? Well its not really concrete like that I think. I mean emotions are simple- the complexity only lies in the degree or if they are mixed with another emotion. I think I get a pretty complete picture of how someone is feeling simply by interacting with them.
 

soft

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May 1, 2010
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infp
I could probably walk into a room with my eyes closed and tell you if the person were feeling positive or negative.

i hate to sound like an ass, but.. really? :huh:

I mean.. i could maybe do the same.. but i would have to listen to their voice at least. I'm not saying i don't believe the people who say stuff like this, i just don't really understand it, i guess.
for me it's pretty much the same as many others said: body language, voice, past experiences, gut feelings. sometimes i'm way off.. but it's pretty easy for me to understand why most people do the things they do. especially if i can tell that i've been in the same situation before. so i guess i rely on past experiences the most.
 

Lady_X

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sx/sp
negative energy is much thicker...i know what she means. :)
 

Abstract Thinker

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4w5
^ me too. i swear i can feel it before the senses take hold. nothing new to me or my kind. i used to think assume that everybody was that way.

magic? mysticism?

who knows? who cares?

but it does work for some of us.

there's always a price to pay though. nothing is free...

oh boy do us "feelers" pay in other ways. :huh:
 

Talisyn

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i hate to sound like an ass, but.. really? :huh:

.
You don't sound like an ass, just a little skeptical :newwink:
But, yeah, really, and I guess it may sound a little bizarre, but its always been that way for me. Think about the phrase "The air was thick with tension" I believe that comes from the fact that tension can indeed be felt.
negative energy is much thicker...i know what she means. :)
Exactly! And thanx :hug:
^ me too. i swear i can feel it before the senses take hold. nothing new to me or my kind. i used to think assume that everybody was that way.

magic? mysticism?

who knows? who cares?

but it does work for some of us.

there's always a price to pay though. nothing is free...

oh boy do us "feelers" pay in other ways. :huh:

I suppose its being an empath on some level
 

Lady_X

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it is..mad feels fast and thick...happiness is light and fast and calm/serene is midweight and slow...and sadness is heavy and slow ...whoa that sounds all kinds of weird. i've actually never thought about it before. haha
 

Moiety

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it is..mad feels fast and thick...happiness is light and fast and calm/serene is midweight and slow...and sadness is heavy and slow ...whoa that sounds all kinds of weird. i've actually never thought about it before. haha

That's cause your head is imagining it all.

Seriously people, try going inside a room with people blindfolded and with earplugs and see how your energy indicators work then...
 

Lady_X

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well i don't know what that is but it's felt or experienced like that for some reason.

and...i've mentioned before that you can certainly feel the absence of energy while in a room with someone who has passed....you can't claim something is imagined just because you haven't experienced it personally.


and...just to expand...it's not something felt outside of myself. i think it's absorbed and i feel it internally...i think it also has something to do with that buzz and effusiveness that happens when in company of people who are all light and happy and in good moods...it's absorbed and bubbles over somehow...yep.
 

Moiety

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well i don't know what that is but it's felt or experienced like that for some reason.

and...i've mentioned before that you can certainly feel the absence of energy while in a room with someone who has passed....you can't claim something is imagined just because you haven't experienced it personally.


and...just to expand...it's not something felt outside of myself. i think it's absorbed and i feel it internally...i think it also has something to do with that buzz and effusiveness that happens when in company of people who are all light and happy and in good moods...it's absorbed and bubbles over somehow...yep.


Just do the test I suggested and see if you feel the same. Intuitive people that can't explain the "phenomena" they experience. Everything "mystical" in this world is like that. Just because you can't explain it though, doesn't mean there is a way for you to feel this abstract concept called "energy". If it's something that is anywhere else but inside your head, then EVERYONE should be able to experience this.

It's just like empathy and reading people. One doesn't pick a vibe from people. The brain simply processes a lot of the information subconsciously, specially with NFs (abstract perception AND abstract judging).

Lik any emotion, it's not outside of ones body, but rather, inside one's brain.
 
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