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[INFJ] INFJ Compatibility - INFJ's Romantic Match?

Are male INFJ's really that uncommon?

  • Yes

    Votes: 15 53.6%
  • No

    Votes: 5 17.9%
  • I don't know.

    Votes: 8 28.6%

  • Total voters
    28
  • Poll closed .

FantailedWall

New member
Joined
Nov 25, 2008
Messages
247
MBTI Type
ENfP
Enneagram
4w5
I think the NT (female) and NF (male) combination works out REALLY well! My male INFJ friend (who I secretly love!)...is always SO amazed that a woman can actually carry on a logical conversation. He always seems to start conversations with, "You are the ONLY woman I know who....." Sometimes it makes me feel like I am some sort of freak because I am not one of the girls, but I'm really NOT...am I? ;)

But - I get told this also, and I'm an 'F'.
(Though there HAS been some speculation as to whether I'm an 'ENxP'. Which I kind of disregard, seeing as I'm ENFP through-and-through - just one who understands the value of logic and objectivity. We DO exist!)

To answer the OP's question - an INFJs best match?
Me. :wubbie:

....I'm just fabulous at keeping my love of INFJs private, ain't I? ;)
 

Siegfried

New member
Joined
Aug 21, 2008
Messages
237
MBTI Type
?
But - I get told this also, and I'm an 'F'.
(Though there HAS been some speculation as to whether I'm an 'ENxP'. Which I kind of disregard, seeing as I'm ENFP through-and-through - just one who understands the value of logic and objectivity. We DO exist!)

To answer the OP's question - an INFJs best match?
Me. :wubbie:

....I'm just fabulous at keeping my love of INFJs private, ain't I? ;)

I have to say, ENFs are amazing aswell. You probably are :hug:
 

LotsOfHeart

New member
Joined
Feb 14, 2009
Messages
298
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
4
Male INFJ.

I find that ENFP's and most introverted or intuitive feelers are good matches for most of us.

ENTP's seem cool, but for me, I don't think I could be with someone who was more thinking oriented than feeling. A large part of what I want in a woman is someone who I can talk to because I'm a guy and I find it hard to discuss my feelings with other guys (and often would feel weird doing that anyway).
 

ReadingRainbows

Cat Wench
Joined
Jan 28, 2009
Messages
1,885
MBTI Type
ENFJ
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
My experience in past relationships is that my girlfriends fall madly in love with me but I fail to fall for them.

Bada boom bada bing I'm not the only one with this problem.

I know that I almost straddle the fence when it comes to I and E and my J is only 1%. It is not so much those I worry about but rather looking to avoid clashing in the NF space (I am solid NF).

Another weak Jer!!!! We border on Ps I think, GO US!!!

Also, she is also one of those NF's that needs to reenergize after being around a group of people or intense emotional contact with another person. I want to learn how to give her what she needs (space.. or whatever) to do what she needs to do during those times. I am hoping one of you ladies out there can shed some light on that aspect.


This depends on her feelings twards you, sometimes I need recharge, I run, or play the music load, or occasionally have someone I can't get enough of.
Good Luck to Ya'll.
 

the state i am in

Active member
Joined
Feb 12, 2009
Messages
2,475
MBTI Type
infj
Enneagram
5w4
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
enfp- muse, balance, life-affirming, keenly perceptive, etc. it's like yin-yang and the wilco song i'm always in love
intj- big picture! maybe it's the magic mushrooms but she keeps telling me i'm talking in colors. and i kinda like that. like we're both looking at the same imaginary canvas.

i keep believing infp, but i think i'm just in denial. but their hearts, so pure, if only we could communicate!
esfp and isfp are so intriguing bc they do stuff, make stuff, etc. they have hearts but they can still be so lite, lite, lite!
also intp, enfj, entp- the banter is NEVER better... checkmate!
 

Thursday

Earth Exalted
Joined
Mar 14, 2008
Messages
3,960
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Enneagram
8w9
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
enfp- muse, balance, life-affirming, keenly perceptive, etc. it's like yin-yang and the wilco song i'm always in love
intj- big picture! maybe it's the magic mushrooms but she keeps telling me i'm talking in colors. and i kinda like that. like we're both looking at the same imaginary canvas.

i keep believing infp, but i think i'm just in denial. but their hearts, so pure, if only we could communicate!
esfp and isfp are so intriguing bc they do stuff, make stuff, etc. they have hearts but they can still be so lite, lite, lite!
also intp, enfj, entp- the banter is NEVER better... checkmate!

agreed on all accounts
 

penelope

New member
Joined
Nov 17, 2008
Messages
249
MBTI Type
INxJ
I take back what I've said before about INFJ-INFJ matches.

I'm currently dating a third INFJ guy (how do I keep finding them? jeez). I realized the problems with the first two, mostly having to do with them not being developed well, especially as far as insecurities go. I didn't like how needy both seemed to be, for one thing.

However, this third INFJ (third time's a charm, y'know), things seem to be going as perfectly as they could be. And I promise I'm not being idealistic!

Here's why we seem to be the "perfect" couple so far (based on INFJ tendencies):

- we're both striving for the perfect relationship, which entails:
- very bluntly clear and honest in our communication, especially through writing
- sensitive to each other's personalities
- we seem to "mirror" each other. at first, that made us both feel strange, as if we were finding ourselves in the other person, but it became very comforting, since we're both such unique individuals. In two weaker people, it might drive the attraction away, but we're both strong, confident, independent people who know fairly well who we are, so it works out very, very well.
-our ideals, standards, and beliefs are very similar, if not the same. This saves a lot of possible strife in other pairings.
- we're constantly analyzing our relationship and how we interact with each other, looking for weak spots that could be improved (can't find any so far!)

I've been trying to put the feelings into words lately... it's very difficult! I think because we are both well balanced and well developed INFJs, this makes for an ideal match. :)
 

Winds of Thor

New member
Joined
Jan 11, 2009
Messages
1,842
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
3w4
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Why avoid the S? I've had more problems with N types than S types in relationships.

A reason is because it's fundamental to be able to follow one another in thought. And as I'm sure you are at least familiar with this, Ss and Ns fundamentally see different things in their outlook. Ss basically deal in the here and now with facts and/or what they see. Ns focus on future and possibilities as well as theory and abstraction...in addition to the here and now if need be. :)
 

BlackCat

Shaman
Joined
Nov 19, 2008
Messages
7,038
MBTI Type
ESFP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
ENTP, ENFP, ESTJ, ISTJ, ISTP, ESTP. Depends entirely on what the INFJ wants.
 

Kungpowish

New member
Joined
May 7, 2009
Messages
103
MBTI Type
ENFJ
Enneagram
two
There is the chemistry factor where some types just click with me, such as ENFJs.

Yeah, I was just in a really great relationship with an INFJ. We were like two parts of a puzzle, but I will say I had trouble with her values sometimes. She placed a lot of importance on what she was doing and why and I just wanted to be with her. That's what tore us apart actually, she wanted to travel and I wanted her to be where I could see her.:cry:
 

lbloom

New member
Joined
Jun 15, 2007
Messages
83
MBTI Type
INTP
You're kidding, right? The S/N difference is nearly insurmountable.

I know two INFJ-ESTP couples. One male INFJ, the other female. I don't know the male INFJ / female ESTP pair well enough, but the other one seems really well adjusted.

The INFJs seem to have priorities that aren't immediately obvious.

There are two combinations where opposites seem to attract: ESTJ men with INFP women, and ESTP men with INFJ women. However, this may be due in part to the fact that these two types of men are also the most likely to be married multiple times.

From PersonalityDesk - Resources - Compatibility and Your Myers-Briggs. The original papers are cited at the bottom of that page.
 

Sentura

Phoenix Incarnate
Joined
Apr 23, 2009
Messages
750
MBTI Type
ENXP
Enneagram
1w9
out of the ~250ish people i know, there are 2 INFJs. both are male (i would already have hit that if there was a female).
 

tibby

New member
Joined
Nov 22, 2008
Messages
682
MBTI Type
fool
My experience in past relationships is that my girlfriends fall madly in love with me but I fail to fall for them.

yea. But when do... it's... quite something
 

tibby

New member
Joined
Nov 22, 2008
Messages
682
MBTI Type
fool
How so? I need more info.

I can only speak for myself and all I know I might be a deviant weirdo among all the other INFJs.

It's a slow, slow process, first with all. It cannot be pushed or pressured or fastened. But I know of myself when I love, it's the most intense, deep, out of this world kind depth of feeling. And as being me (the weirdo deviant or just your regular nextdoor infj) I usually get these bursts - I mean in the quietness of myself, I get absolute overwhelming bursts of it from time to time that make me feel connected in ways I can't describe. Like a Phoenix, it burns burns burns burns - and rebirths.
 

Synarch

Once Was
Joined
Oct 14, 2008
Messages
8,445
MBTI Type
ENTP
I can only speak for myself and all I know I might be a deviant weirdo among all the other INFJs.

It's a slow, slow process, first with all. It cannot be pushed or pressured or fastened. But I know of myself when I love, it's the most intense, deep, out of this world kind depth of feeling. And as being me (the weirdo deviant or just your regular nextdoor infj) I usually get these bursts - I mean in the quietness of myself, I get absolute overwhelming bursts of it from time to time that make me feel connected in ways I can't describe. Like a Phoenix, it burns burns burns burns - and rebirths.

So, sounds like a very deep and lasting type of love? Interesting.
 

Synarch

Once Was
Joined
Oct 14, 2008
Messages
8,445
MBTI Type
ENTP
Isn't all love? I know some people might take that word, the meaning, lightly; I do not.

Well, of course. I was just trying to get more information by asking leading questions. INFJ's are rather inscrutable sometimes.
 
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