• You are currently viewing our forum as a guest, which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community, you will have access to additional post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), view blogs, respond to polls, upload content, and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free, so please join our community today! Just click here to register. You should turn your Ad Blocker off for this site or certain features may not work properly. If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us by clicking here.

[ENFP] Hate an ENFP? Tell us why!

findthejake

New member
Joined
Sep 30, 2007
Messages
258
MBTI Type
ENFP
Just curious if anyone out there has anything against enfp's...

We are always curious as to what people really think about us so let us have it!


anything at all....
 

FreedomofSpeech

Permabanned
Joined
Oct 16, 2007
Messages
23
MBTI Type
NT
Just curious if anyone out there has anything against enfp's...

We are always curious as to what people really think about us so let us have it!


anything at all....

You women are too nervous, never dress correctlty for the right occasion and always want sex when I just want to talk.
 

Mycroft

The elder Holmes
Joined
Jun 7, 2007
Messages
1,068
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
so/sp
Every for-sure ENFP I've known has been great.

(Glad to be of absolutely no service!)
 

SolitaryWalker

Tenured roisterer
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
3,504
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
I don't think that any hostility towards ENFPs you'll find has anything to do with the ENFP type-or the unconscious tendencies of people who call themselves ENFPs. It is mostly associated with the behaviors of such individuals when they are off-balance.

That is most commonly associated with a lack of involvement of Introverted Feeling in their psyche, because their Extroverted Intuition has been preponderous over their Introverted Feeling. Such individuals often tend to be fickle because they lack focus and tend to be dishonest because their Judging function (the one they do ethics with) is subservient to their Externally oriented function. There they will only try to convince others that they have those virtues that are associated with Introverted Feeling, without making sure that they truly do have them.

This, however can be rectified as the ENFP matures and strikes a fair balance between the involvement of their dominant and auxiliary function.
 
Last edited:

Economica

Dhampyr
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
2,054
MBTI Type
INTJ
Poor control of Ne. (This goes for ENTPs too.) I adore Ne :wubbie: and I am Disagreeable and single-minded enough to retain control of a conversation despite multiple tangential interruptions, both of which probably make me more tolerant than most people, but if an ENXP needs to STFU and let someone else talk, even I want to throttle them. (Here's a relevant plug for a post I just made in the thread about ENFP/ENFJ dynamics.)

I agree with BlueWing that developing the auxiliary function is key.
 

FreedomofSpeech

Permabanned
Joined
Oct 16, 2007
Messages
23
MBTI Type
NT
I don't think that any hostility towards ENFPs you'll find has anything to do with the ENFP type-or the unconscious tendencies of people who call themselves ENFPs. It is mostly associated with the behaviors of such individuals when they are off-balance.

That is most commonly associated with a lack of involvement of Introverted Feeling in their psyche, because their Extroverted Intuition has been preponderous over their Introverted Feeling. Such individuals often tend to be fickle because they lack focus and dishonest because their Judging function (the one they do ethics) with is subservient to their Externally oriented function. There they will only try to convince others that they have those virtues that are associated with Introverted Feeling, without making sure that they truly do have them.

This, however can be rectified as the ENFP matures and strikes a fair balance between the involvement of their dominant and auxiliary function.

BW. have you ever known ab ENFP in person?
 

arcticangel02

To the top of the world
Joined
Oct 5, 2007
Messages
892
MBTI Type
eNFP
Just curious if anyone out there has anything against enfp's...

We are always curious as to what people really think about us so let us have it!


anything at all....


This made me laugh. ^^ I'm curious, too.
 

Natrushka

Pareo cattus
Joined
Jun 7, 2007
Messages
1,213
MBTI Type
INTJ
My FIL and BIL are ENFPs and they can both be charming and annoying in the same breath. What I find most difficult about them probably has more to do with my type; they are both vociferous extroverts and they like to invade my (everyone's) personal space.

Ironically my FIL detests being interrupted - he can give it out but he just can't take it. And he can take the shortest story in existence and make it the longest.
 

Blackwater

New member
Joined
May 29, 2007
Messages
454
MBTI Type
ERTP
I too have suffered ENxPs who sooooo needed to STFU. Ne naturally loves being the center of attention and both enfp and entp have their various reasons to interrupt and/or unravel focus in conversations. :headphne: :party:

in a broaders context, this is a general character trait of obnoxious people. so while ENPs may have a natural inclination here its certainly no excuse. look at the person, not the type.
 

Wolf

only bites when provoked
Joined
Apr 24, 2007
Messages
2,127
MBTI Type
INTJ
Most are really cool, but then there's that "findthejake" guy on here sometimes. He's exceptionally annoying.
 

faith

New member
Joined
Apr 25, 2007
Messages
408
MBTI Type
INFJ
I've only met one ENFP in real life--my aunt. She's a saint who drives me up the wall. I lived with her for 3 years. I'm not sure I can attribute all her bothersome traits to her personality type, though; it's probably just her particular combination of things.

Rant:
1) She has pouncing monologues. I always think of her as a spider with a huge sticky web. If you're full of your own thoughts, exploring some idea or experience, and happen to walk near her general vicinity, she'll pounce on you and subject you to a monologue about nothing. And it doesn't end. If you are nice and polite and put away your own thoughts so you can make her happy and pay attention to her, she goes on and on and on and on... If you try to steer the conversation toward something meaningful and interesting, she'll flit all around but never settle long enough join your thoughts. The only way to get away is just to walk away while she's talking to you. Even if you excuse yourself first, she'll keep talking WHILE YOU'RE WALKING AWAY!!!!!

2) She can't think unless her mouth is engaged. I used to have to work with her, and we had to collaborate on ideas for newsletters and stuff. I'd come to the meeting with all my ideas planned out and ready to present. She'd come with no ideas at all, and then want to waste my time just talking about her own ideas until she decided which ones she liked (this could take several hours of nonstop talking). It used to tie me into knots because every idea she presented I'd take quite seriously and begin to reconstruct my own plans around it--and then 15 minutes later she'd change her mind.

3) She loves sad stories, loves to tell them, and loves to weep while she tells them. And she wants you to weep with her.

4) Everyone who is in some difficult situation, she sees as a victim. It's not the poor person's fault; we should fix everything for them! Of course this comes from a wonderfully loving and gentle heart, but it hasn't been particularly good for her children.

5) She doesn't really want to know you--she just wants to know enough to feel close to you. In the beginning I made the mistake of thinking that she really did want to know me, and all that annoying talking was her way of being friends. But when I'd open up and share myself with her, she'd take it with a grain of salt. I suppose that's because she's accustomed to talking about herself so much that it doesn't mean a lot to her, so she assumes it's true for others. It surprised and hurt me at first; then I was resentful for a while. Now I don't expect real understanding from her, so it's not so bad. Only that NF part of her keeps begging that NF part of me to share and bond and so forth, and I have to keep reminding myself that it's just an illusion and not to be taken seriously.

6) Absolutely nothing can be discussed dispassionately.

7) One of her pet ways of making people feel good about themselves is to act as though that person is practically saving her life by helping her out somehow. When she needs something, she'll come begging. The sticky neediness of her begging annoys me no end, but I think she does it because she's found that it makes some people feel good about themselves to be needed in that way. It seems very manipulative to me. She thanked me over and over for feeding some kittens of a stray cat. It bothered me because it was only a little thing that I wanted to do anyway and I never expected her to care about the kittens--she had way too much other stuff to do. But then she acted like I was a little angel to spend 10 minutes a day with kittens. (As though it were a chore!--they're KITTENS!) If she really felt that grateful, it'd be one thing--but she doesn't. She just wants to say it so you'll feel appreciated.

8) That tendency to manipulate is very pronounced in her. (I think I maybe guilty of this myself, but not as much as she.) She'll pretend like everything is her fault just to get people to stop arguing. That drives me up the wall! It makes me so angry that she says things that are patently false just to make people feel good, rather than let people argue and work through the issue themselves.

9) She always wants to touch you. Hug you or hold your hand or something, especially when you're annoyed with her. Gah, I hate that! The last thing I want to do is hold the hand of someone I'm annoyed with. And she stands too close; her personal space is way too small.

I'm going to stop here. It's probably not healthy for me to think this much about things I dislike about her.

The time I liked her best was when she got angry and smashed her fist against the doorpost. I thought, "Finally! A genuine expression rather than one specifically designed to make people feel good." Only she ruined it later by apologizing to me for letting me see her angry.
 

Natrushka

Pareo cattus
Joined
Jun 7, 2007
Messages
1,213
MBTI Type
INTJ
With the exception of #8 your aunt could be my FIL, Faith.
 

Ivy

Strongly Ambivalent
Joined
Apr 18, 2007
Messages
23,989
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
6
I know a lot of ENFPs, actually. They're great fun to be around but easily distracted by shiny objects. :)

Seriously though, I have an ENFP brother. I adore him. When we're together, we're bestest friends. But when he goes home it's out of sight, out of mind- I don't hear from him again until we're at the same family function.

It's not that he's totally unreliable-- he's a successful IT manager, actually, and a great (fun) dad. And if it were really super important I have no doubt that I could trust him with my life. I would call on him first for any kind of morale-building.
 

proteanmix

Plumage and Moult
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
5,514
Enneagram
1w2
Faith, have you tried telling her about the way you feel when she does this?
 

Eve

New member
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
64
I know a lot of ENFPs, actually. They're great fun to be around but easily distracted by shiny objects. :)

Seriously though, I have an ENFP brother. I adore him. When we're together, we're bestest friends. But when he goes home it's out of sight, out of mind- I don't hear from him again until we're at the same family function.

It's not that he's totally unreliable-- he's a successful IT manager, actually, and a great (fun) dad. And if it were really super important I have no doubt that I could trust him with my life. I would call on him first for any kind of morale-building.

The only complaint I have is their occasional disappearance. Other than that, the ones I've met are great people.
 

findthejake

New member
Joined
Sep 30, 2007
Messages
258
MBTI Type
ENFP
these all sound pretty for real, as I could see them being issues.

Keep it coming!
 

Maverick

New member
Joined
Apr 29, 2007
Messages
880
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Just curious if anyone out there has anything against enfp's...

We are always curious as to what people really think about us so let us have it!


anything at all....

I like you a great deal EXCEPT when you get paranoid about people liking you :)
 

shen

New member
Joined
Sep 27, 2007
Messages
129
MBTI Type
ENFP
enfps

dicky birds and love hearts
flying round the room
at hundred miles an hour,
who says excitement gets you nowhere...
all pated in twitter,
as she tries to look fitter
to be the best for her luvverluvver

michelle my belle
drags me in on her spell
oh god not anuvvernuvver
givvin too much
too soon
it gets on my very lastest nerve....
course i'm just as bad
its an nfp bad
but my cornflake ive now learned to cuvver;)
 

Ivy

Strongly Ambivalent
Joined
Apr 18, 2007
Messages
23,989
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
6
Shen! LOL that was great, glad you're back. :)
 
Top