• You are currently viewing our forum as a guest, which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community, you will have access to additional post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), view blogs, respond to polls, upload content, and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free, so please join our community today! Just click here to register. You should turn your Ad Blocker off for this site or certain features may not work properly. If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us by clicking here.

[ENFP] Hate an ENFP? Tell us why!

Lauren Ashley

Revelation
Joined
Aug 19, 2008
Messages
3,067
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
4
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
This is just WOW. It's pregnant women now. What's next -- attacking puppies and babies? Seriously, completely insensitive and rude. Can't imagine this being related to type - just someone who lacks empathy (are you sure this person is an ENFP) and is very immature. Also very poor interpersonal skills. An ENFP? Really?

Yes, she took the MBTI twice, and is high on all preferences. She seems very much like an ENFP to me -- she works as a battered women and children's rights activist (I know, the irony is unbearable). She is sensitive to her own feelings and sees herself as a martyr, she's just not sensitive to others' feelings who she has not deemed worthy of empathy. She does lack interpersonal skills, but to be fair, she is now going to therapy to work on this.
 

Moiety

New member
Joined
Aug 3, 2008
Messages
5,996
MBTI Type
ISFJ
In my brother's case though, he says the same thing as you, but to most other people who talk about him it's pretty obvious that the reason they don't bring things up with him is because to do so is like running the gauntlet and seldom gets anywhere. The only possible outcomes, from personal experience of not just myself but many others, all share in common that you're left feeling very frustrated, dismissed, unheard and that you've had traits and motivations ascribed to you that are so absolutely ludicrous that it's as though your body was simply a stage prop filling in for the person he was actually talking about. He walks away happy because as far as he's concerned he's defended his corner and if you still have a problem then it's your fault, and it's no skin off his nose if you're a "loser", but the other person walks away feeling a lot of impotent frustration and rage that can take days to go away because the person you need to address about it, you know will simply not hear it or answer for it or take any responsibility for it at all.

Judge and jury you mean? I will say that I do feel guilt-free if I have explained my position in a way that I see as being impartial and easy for everyone to understand.

But I always personally give people the opportunity
for others to react or clarify or whatever.


He also takes absence of criticism as absence of flaws in himself

This I can understand. The rest I don't relate with. It's about putting yourself out there and making decisions based on the feedback you get. If you don't get feedback you keep making the same mistakes.

Like what I was mentioning before. Addressing the issue right away is paramount, otherwise I think you have no problems with it and will move on.


Ah, but how will you really truly know whether it's unwarranted unless you first let the person have their say and listen without getting defensive and upset, or walking away? With the ENFP's I know, half the time the reason they think it's unwarranted is because they have yet to actually listen to your whole point of view, and are stuck on what they've extrapolated your point to be from the half-sentences you can squeeze in between their self-justifications and seriously screwy retellings of events (man, I thought my Si was bad but these guys make me look like an ISxJ!). And sometimes I wonder if they don't sorta do that on purpose, because it's easier to argue against an insanely half-baked idea that nobody actually suggested, but which, if they did, would make them stupid and nasty people (and therefore easier to dimsiss) than to take on board the rather more sensible and possibly valid one that somebody actually did say, which might mean accepting that you've done wrong and having to apologize.

Yeah personally can't relate. I always wait for people to finish before I say my piece.
 

ergophobe

Allergic to Mornings
Joined
Apr 26, 2009
Messages
1,210
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
7w6
The thing that's great about this site is the self awareness you are offered. I have toned myself down my degrees since seeing how people see ENTPs. Now for the ones that live in blissful ignorance, I am sure they can be accused of things that I just don't do (anymore...)

Thanks Jeno. That's exactly what I am hoping for here as well. I'd like to learn and be more sensitive and be able to use my Fe as well as my Fi. That is most certainly a personal goal . I'm just finding it hard to discern some of those commonalities in this thread. I definitely have my ears open. Perhaps I'll read through again later.
 

jenocyde

half mystic, half skeksis
Joined
Jan 2, 2009
Messages
6,387
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w8
I thought this thread would have a more productive goal - in trying to isolate traits that may be more general to the type. The problem with just reflecting personal experiences is that they are countered by more personal experiences in the negative. For example, if you've come across the same problem with several ENFPS, perhaps that may be type related (at least a better case made for it) versus an N of 1.

Unless, this is meant to be a group vent against ENFPs by folsk who have small Ns of them in real life and came on to do precisely the above, see if their personal frustrations are reflected in others' experiences with ENFPs. Perhaps I misunderstood the purpose. I apologize profusely, if I did :wink:

Everything regarding MBTI is a personal experience. It's entirely empirical.
That being said, Lauren, Sub and I have all said the same thing today. We don't know each other and are on a different continent entirely with Sub. So it could stand to reason that these issues are not isolated and is characteristic of the type, even if not you specifically. Or it could another case of not being able to hear any negativity, like we've been saying? :cheese:

I don't know. I don't want to bash. But I get my fair share of bashing as well. I take it and listen and do what I can with it. :hug:
 

substitute

New member
Joined
May 27, 2007
Messages
4,601
MBTI Type
ENTP
Unless, this is meant to be a group vent against ENFPs by folsk who have small Ns of them in real life and came on to do precisely the above, see if their personal frustrations are reflected in others' experiences with ENFPs. Perhaps I misunderstood the purpose. I apologize profusely, if I did :wink:

I'd say that if lots of people rant about their personal ENFP's, and then compare rants and find that there are lots of common trends, then that would, presumably, mean that it's probably type related!!!

:alttongue:
that one?
 

ergophobe

Allergic to Mornings
Joined
Apr 26, 2009
Messages
1,210
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
7w6
Everything regarding MBTI is a personal experience. It's entirely empirical.

That being said, Lauren, Sub and I have all said the same thing today. We don't know each other and are on a different continent entirely with Sub. So it could stand to reason that these issues are not isolated and is characteristic of the type, even if not you specifically. Or it could another case of not being able to hear any negativity, like we've been saying? :cheese:

I don't know. I don't want to bash. But I get my fair share of bashing as well. I take it and listen and do what I can with it. :hug:

I have no trouble with bashing. I don't see this exercise as bashing either since I don't know or identify personally with any of the people you all have mentioned. It's not personal. I'm really just trying to maximize my own learning. Empirical is fine but the sample size matters. That was the point I was trying to make.

I'd like to read over and isolate things that you all agreed on versus the individual personal anecdotes. Some of them were so offensive on a humanitarian level, I wanted to issue a pope-style all encompassing apology on behalf of all ENFPs everywhere. :nono:

If these were even remotely type related, I am horrified and wanting to take X cover again. :smile:
 

phthalocyanine

#005645
Joined
Jun 2, 2009
Messages
679
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
9w1
Instinctual Variant
sx
the ENFPs i know are bold, opinionated, and will always stick up for their friends...except when their SO is watching..
(i can't and don't hate them, though.)
 

Tiny Army

New member
Joined
Jan 12, 2009
Messages
679
MBTI Type
EN?P
Enneagram
7
But what happens if I don't ever wish to discuss it with you?

But I just wanna knooooooow...

No seriously, sometimes I don't want to talk about things either. "I don't want to talk about it" usually means I don't want to talk about it and I do genuinely try to respect that.

If you do, however say "I don't want to talk about it" and then proceed to repeatedly reference whatever it is they didn't talk about and then withdraw, eventually I will snap "Well do you want to talk about it or don't you? For someone who doesn't want to talk about it you sure seem to be mentioning it a lot." and then I get yelled at for being rude.
 

substitute

New member
Joined
May 27, 2007
Messages
4,601
MBTI Type
ENTP
Judge and jury you mean? I will say that I do feel guilt-free if I have explained my position in a way that I see as being impartial and easy for everyone to understand.

Right. So you don't see anything to be gained in listening to other people's points of view and maybe incorporating them into your position? That does sound rather rigid and a tad self-righteous to me and yes, it does suggest that to you, the effect of your decisions on others is of little consequence. Can you see how that would create an impression of selfishness and insensitivity?

This I can understand. The rest I don't relate with. It's about putting yourself out there and making decisions based on the feedback you get. If you don't get feedback you keep making the same mistakes.

And if you do get feedback, but instantly dismiss it, then you also don't learn. And if you don't give people any reason to believe that giving you feedback is worth the effort, then they're not going to give you any. So if you really want the feedback and you really want to learn and improve yourself, I'd say to make sure you're not putting people off giving feedback, and if you don't feel like you're getting much, I'd say watch carefully how you react when you get it, and you'll get your answer.

About addressing the issue right away - ENxP's in general can be quite the whirlwind. I know this to be the case, that though we're often okay to juggle a dozen things at once and adapt and move on very quickly, most other people need a bit more time. Sometimes people get dragged along in our wake without us realizing we're even making a "wake" (lol), and they don't even get to realize how we've affected them until after the event, when we've gone and they've got peace and quiet to think about things. So, I've learned that when someone brings something up with me, it's rather insensitive to dismiss it just because they took their time figuring it out or working up the courage to raise it with me. And it's even worse to accuse them of insincere or otherwise bad motives simply because they didn't say anything at the time.

Yeah personally can't relate. I always wait for people to finish before I say my piece.

My ENFP's always say that too, but they actually don't in reality ;)
 

Kalach

Filthy Apes!
Joined
Dec 3, 2008
Messages
4,310
MBTI Type
INTJ
Did you know... Fe and Te are antagonistic.

So, all these ENFPs saying they have Fe...



Not hatin' per se. Just thinkin' it's a stupid conceit.
 

substitute

New member
Joined
May 27, 2007
Messages
4,601
MBTI Type
ENTP
I find I get along okay with ENFP's though in general, but I must admit I do kinda feel like I have to take quite a bit of time off if I've seen them quite a lot in a short period, and I've learned to make a conscious effort to sort of take them in small doses.

INFP's are a totally different story though - I feel happy to spend all the time in the world with them, and whatever problems occur seem to get properly sorted out quite quickly and it strengthens the relationship, whilst with ENFP's they never seem to really actually get sorted out and it seems to only deepen the misunderstanding the more I try.

I've speculated in the past as to whether it's to do with the whole Fi thing - with it being all about very individual values, often unique or peculiar to that person. Perhaps the INFP's just better at dealing with Fi, and maybe just more aware of how personal their peculiarities are and so less likely to expect others to live up to them or whatever, whilst the ENFP's might be perhaps a little less aware of this highly idiosyncratic part of themselves because they're more tuned into the chameleonic Ne that seems to be able to get on with everyone. Maybe they confuse the two at times, I dunno...
 

ergophobe

Allergic to Mornings
Joined
Apr 26, 2009
Messages
1,210
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
7w6
I'd say that if lots of people rant about their personal ENFP's, and then compare rants and find that there are lots of common trends, then that would, presumably, mean that it's probably type related!!!

Yes, it certainly could be. I'm just saying these seem to be fewer and harder to identify as compared to the personal anecdotes. Help me with identifying more. Please?

From what I understand so far:
1. Can be very insensitive to other people's problems/issues.
I'm not sure what to make of the interpersonal issues (expressing this insensitivity inappropriately and hurting people in the process-- if this is more common or isolated. Unclear.
2. Does not listen to others carefully. I can see this being a problem. This is a problem I personally face with other extroverts too.
3. Defensive when criticized.
4. Intrusive.

This is what I have so far. What did I miss?


:alttongue: that one?

Yeah, that one, thanks. :alttongue:
 

Lauren Ashley

Revelation
Joined
Aug 19, 2008
Messages
3,067
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
4
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
If these were even remotely type related, I am horrified and wanting to take X cover again. :smile:
I think a lot of the issues stem from the ENFPs working on Ne mainly, and using their Fi to justify being selfish and unconcerned with others. Ne is a tricky bugger; always skipping from one thing to the next without finishing the last, and saying randomly whatever pops into the person's head.

PersonalityPage's Personal Growth section has been very helpful to me in terms of identifying my own issues. The ENFP section may be helpful for you as well.

These "Rules to Live By" for ENFPs seem applicable to our discussion. Especially numbers 2 and 5.

2. Face Your Weaknesses! Realize and accept that some traits are strengths and some are weaknesses. By facing your weaknesses, you can overcome them and they will have less power over you.

5. Smile at Criticism. Try to see disagreement and discord as an opportunity for growth, because that’s exactly what it is. Try not to become overly defensive towards criticism; try to hear it and judge it objectively.

6. Be Aware of Others. Remember that there are 15 other personality types out there who see things differently than you see them. Most of your problems with other people are easier to deal with if you try to understand the other person's perspective.

8. Be Accountable for Yourself. Don’t waste mental energy finding blame in other’s behaviour, or in identifying yourself as a victim. You have more control over your life than any other person has.

From what I understand so far:
1. Can be very insensitive to other people's problems/issues.
I'm not sure what to make of the interpersonal issues (expressing this insensitivity inappropriately and hurting people in the process-- if this is more common or isolated. Unclear.
2. Does not listen to others carefully. I can see this being a problem. This is a problem I personally face with other extroverts too.
3. Defensive when criticized.
4. Intrusive.
Yes, exactly. See above :)
 

substitute

New member
Joined
May 27, 2007
Messages
4,601
MBTI Type
ENTP
Yes, it certainly could be. I'm just saying these seem to be fewer and harder to identify as compared to the personal anecdotes. Help me with identifying more. Please?

From what I understand so far:
1. Can be very insensitive to other people's problems/issues.
I'm not sure what to make of the interpersonal issues (expressing this insensitivity inappropriately and hurting people in the process-- if this is more common or isolated. Unclear.
2. Does not listen to others carefully. I can see this being a problem. This is a problem I personally face with other extroverts too.
3. Defensive when criticized.
4. Intrusive.

This is what I have so far. What did I miss?

Seems about right to me. I see it as quite similar to the ENTP problems in that you've got Ne seeming to get along and fit in with anyone anywhere anytime, harmless, funny, zany old Ne that everyone chuckles affectionately at between occasional times when they marvel at how much they underestimated the silly ol' clown.

But then you've got the secondary which is an introverted judging function, meaning that the way we interpret things can be quite individual and not necessarily always chiming in with the way others see things, or see us. And forgetting often to put those judgements in the proper context of how they fit in with other people's points of view and needs.

I find that in my case, the funny, friendly Ne gets me into trouble, situations that require more attachment than Ti can give me, and then suddenly the easy-going, harmless clown turns into the asshole because there's something here he just can't budge on, and it means not being able to accommodate the expectations of me that Ne has created in other people.

Perhaps Fi functions in a similar way for the ENFP. It could be, I'm just speculating, that your friendly Ne clown has created an expectation of much greater awareness of others' feelings and concerns and/or a much greater need to adapt to them than your Fi can supply.

In this respect it could even be that ENTP, surprisingly, might have it easier with people than ENFP, because we've got "smooth it over, stroke the skittish horse and give it a nosebag" Fe bringing up the left flank, whilst all you've got is bullying and impersonal Te. Stick onto the end of that, that both of us are struggling to actually piece together what ACTUALLY happened because our Si is so appalling that we're lost in a sea of our own interpretations of what happened, and it makes for a bit of a train wreck.

If that speculation's correct, then I don't know who's got it worse - the ENFP who's coming off as a bit of a brat/bully but not caring and considering it everyone else's problem, or the ENTP who's coming off as a bit overdramatic and more attached than they really are, but yet actually quite frustrated and upset by the whole thing.

Did I mention that I was just speculating?? LOL!
 

CzeCze

RETIRED
Joined
Sep 11, 2007
Messages
8,975
MBTI Type
GONE
Sometimes the rampant and open idealism can be rather grating... like when I take my ENFP brother on vacation to see one of the wonders of the world and am unable to take it in or enjoy it because he's grumbling and complaining in my ear the whole time, very vociferously, about how disgusted and disappointed and upset he is that there are - GASP! - souvenir shops everywhere!

Cos like, you know, he expected it to be all pristine and full of high brow super respectful middle class graduates and only the most tasteful and relevant and organic locally sourced ethically traded hand made exquisite souvenirs to be sold! :rolleyes:

Haha, this is so funny because I absolutely do not identify with this. I've gone on a few group trips in the last 6 months and this kind of behavior would drive me nuts and in fact there is one person I refuse to travel with anymore because of their haterade tendencies. The above behavior sounds more INTX-ish to me. :laugh:

I guess I don't read the above attribute as 'too much idealism' but rather a lack of positive attitude which I feel is a part of the 'idealism' of ENFP makeup. Even if I were really disappointed, I wouldn't make a big show of it and would try to make the best of things because there's always a silver lining and you never know what's around the corner.

I especially am mindful of the group vibe and more than for myself I wouldn't want to bring the group down. I think that's a lack of Fe or something I cannot stand people who are so wrapped up in their own negativity that they feel a need to spread it around. It's one thing to be unhappy with something, it's another to start ruining other people's time.

When I've not enjoyed something on a trip, I've been more likely to branch out on my own and do something I like or else clear my head.

Also, I think they sorta need to be adored a bit too much sometimes, so that the slightest expression, however calm or respectful, of disapproval or disagreement with a way that they've behaved can be taken as a great attack on them and they react very very defensively. Whilst all the time trying to pin the blame for what they call "the argument" (but which needn't have been one if they'd responded as calmly as you initiated) on you, projecting their own oversensitivity onto you.

I've heard this before on the forum.

I've noticed a tendency in my brother and another couple of ENFP's that I know, to be just incapable of ever apologizing.

Haha, again this is funny to me because I've been told the opposite and that I apologize too much. It's partly a figure of speech like "I'm sorry" = "I empathisize and I'm sorry to hear that" not necessarily an acceptance of guilt.

I guess "I'm sorry you feel that way" doesn't count as a real apology to you then? :laugh:

They have an image of themselves as being very gracious and generous and all that, but if you actually put it to the test you find that to them it's all about them, no matter how much you say it's not about criticizing or attacking them but about trying to express how you feel, they still seem much more intent on just shutting you up and they're happy to sweep it under the carpet without giving you the chance to properly have your say, no matter how frustrated or upset that leaves you, as long as they don't have to listen to anything that might imply that they're not perfect, and as long as the "conflict" ends. They use the word "conflict" to mean "somebody speaking in a voice that isn't either completely flat or jokey and laughing, particularly when they're talking about me".

Are you sure you're not talking about INFPS? :yim_rolling_on_the_

I wrote a longer answer, but I dunno - I haven't met enough confirmed ENFPs IRL to really comment. Perhaps you just happen to know a lot of immature ENFP types? Perhaps it's the skittish nature of Fi when presented with "a threat". Perhaps it's a common issue with ENTP vs ENFP relations?
 

BlahBlahNounBlah

New member
Joined
Dec 16, 2008
Messages
1,458
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w6
For me, ENFPs are incredible fun as long as we're agreeing.


But the moment we disagree, they freak out. They take it personally. They stop listening. They get passive-aggressive. And it takes so long to move on. Once the disagreement has occurred, they read false meanings into everything I say from that point forward.


That alone makes me keep them at arm's length, no matter how much I like them.



But this could depend a lot on maturity. I've met many immature ENFPs. Not all, but most.
 

Lauren Ashley

Revelation
Joined
Aug 19, 2008
Messages
3,067
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
4
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
It could be, I'm just speculating, that your friendly Ne clown has created an expectation of much greater awareness of others' feelings and concerns and/or a much greater need to adapt to them than your Fi can supply.

In this respect it could even be that ENTP, surprisingly, might have it easier with people than ENFP [...]

This has been my experience, at least when the chips are down (otherwise the ENTP's penchant for debate and rebellious behavior gets them in hot water more often). The ENTP's Fe is a salve for interpersonal friction, while the ENFP's Fi seems rigid and unyielding.
 

jenocyde

half mystic, half skeksis
Joined
Jan 2, 2009
Messages
6,387
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w8
I have no trouble with bashing. I don't see this exercise as bashing either since I don't know or identify personally with any of the people you all have mentioned. It's not personal. I'm really just trying to maximize my own learning. Empirical is fine but the sample size matters. That was the point I was trying to make.

It's not your fault. No need to apologize for a bunch of strangers.
To be fair, we saw patterns and described them. We were then asked for examples, so we gave them.

But I just wanna knooooooow...

No seriously, sometimes I don't want to talk about things either. "I don't want to talk about it" usually means I don't want to talk about it and I do genuinely try to respect that.

If you do, however say "I don't want to talk about it" and then proceed to repeatedly reference whatever it is they didn't talk about and then withdraw, eventually I will snap "Well do you want to talk about it or don't you? For someone who doesn't want to talk about it you sure seem to be mentioning it a lot." and then I get yelled at for being rude.

I never do this. But I find that ENFPs have to "bond" and will feel rejected if I fail to mention everything in my life. If I say I don't wish to speak about it and move on, I can see the curiosity for days afterward. Eventually, I will be questioned about it again and I will still say I don't want to talk about it. At which case either one of two things will happen:

1. I am told that I am not letting him/her "in"
2. I am told that I am not healthy for bottling up emotions.

The first one may be correct. The second one... well, we all have different ways of dealing with problems. My not talking to you about is not bottling it up - I simply do not want to discuss it with you.

For me personally, talking about sensitive issues takes a lot of energy from me. It's exhausting and tiring and is usually counter productive to my growth process. So, I will never bring things up just because someone "wants to know".

I know that in forming relations, there needs to be some exposition. These things come over time on their own volition. Being poked and prodded will make it that these things never come out. I'm not walking through that hell again just because you are curious.
 

BlahBlahNounBlah

New member
Joined
Dec 16, 2008
Messages
1,458
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w6
It's not your fault. No need to apologize for a bunch of strangers.
To be fair, we saw patterns and described them. We were then asked for examples, so we gave them.



I never do this. But I find that ENFPs have to "bond" and will feel rejected if I fail to mention everything in my life. If I say I don't wish to speak about it and move on, I can see the curiosity for days afterward. Eventually, I will be questioned about it again and I will still say I don't want to talk about it. At which case either one of two things will happen:

1. I am told that I am not letting him/her "in"
2. I am told that I am not healthy for bottling up emotions.

The first one may be correct. The second one... well, we all have different ways of dealing with problems. My not talking to you about is not bottling it up - I simply do not want to discuss it with you.

For me personally, talking about sensitive issues takes a lot of energy from me. It's exhausting and tiring and is usually counter productive to my growth process. So, I will never bring things up just because someone "wants to know".

I know that in forming relations, there needs to be some exposition. These things come over time on their own volition. Being poked and prodded will make it that these things never come out. I'm not walking through that hell again just because you are curious.



It's as if I wrote this post myself.
 

ergophobe

Allergic to Mornings
Joined
Apr 26, 2009
Messages
1,210
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
7w6
Seems about right to me. I see it as quite similar to the ENTP problems in that you've got Ne seeming to get along and fit in with anyone anywhere anytime, harmless, funny, zany old Ne that everyone chuckles affectionately at between occasional times when they marvel at how much they underestimated the silly ol' clown.

But then you've got the secondary which is an introverted judging perception, meaning that the way we interpret things can be quite individual and not necessarily always chiming in with the way others see things, or see us. And forgetting often to put those judgements in the proper context of how they fit in with other people's points of view and needs.

I find that in my case, the funny, friendly Ne gets me into trouble, situations that require more attachment than Ti can give me, and then suddenly the easy-going, harmless clown turns into the asshole because there's something here he just can't budge on, and it means not being able to accommodate the expectations of me that Ne has created in other people.

Perhaps Fi functions in a similar way for the ENFP. It could be, I'm just speculating, that your friendly Ne clown has created an expectation of much greater awareness of others' feelings and concerns and/or a much greater need to adapt to them than your Fi can supply.

In this respect it could even be that ENTP, surprisingly, might have it easier with people than ENFP, because we've got "smooth it over, stroke the skittish horse and give it a nosebag" Fe bringing up the left flank, whilst all you've got is bullying and impersonal Te. Stick onto the end of that, that both of us are struggling to actually piece together what ACTUALLY happened because our Si is so appalling that we're lost in a sea of our own interpretations of what happened, and it makes for a bit of a train wreck.

If that speculation's correct, then I don't know who's got it worse - the ENFP who's coming off as a bit of a brat/bully but not caring and considering it everyone else's problem, of the ENTP who's coming off as a bit overdramatic and more attached than they really are, but yet actually quite frustrated and upset by the whole thing.

Did I mention that I was just speculating?? LOL!

VERY well specumulated, Sub. So true. I can think of several recent examples where what you said about the Ne-Fi conflict towards the outside world came into play. I just don't know about the last part.

If that speculation's correct, then I don't know who's got it worse - the ENFP who's coming off as a bit of a brat/bully but not caring and considering it everyone else's problem, of the ENTP who's coming off as a bit overdramatic and more attached than they really are, but yet actually quite frustrated and upset by the whole thing.
.

Do ENTPs come off as overdramatic when they are less attached? In my experience (small N =3 - fair disclosure seemed in order since I raised this point), ENTPs come off as less dramatic and attached than they really are. Your last sentence rings true - they really do seem to be more frustrated and upset than they let on.

With both types, here's a positive, in my opinion. Both get wrapped up in their own Fi-ing and Ti-ing and can go on with their lives completely oblivious :whistling: but when things are brought to their attention, at least with the ENFPs and ENTPs I know, they are sensitive. With the ENFPs, even if they are initially defensive, they do go away and Fi-le (couldn't resist) what was said and alter behavior. I know I do.
 
Top