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[INFP] My little niece might be an INFP

Alwar

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She's six years of age and seems to have some INFP characterstics. I'll name a few that come to mind:

-During holidays, I always go into an empty room to get away from the noise for a bit. She comes in and sits on my lap because there are people there she doesn't know well and she feels comfortable with me. I always pat her poofy blond hair and say things like "yeah who are those strange people out there, all that noise and stuff."

-When it comes to conversations, I will ask her something and she'll ramble on forever about anything and everything. But around strangers she is very reserved.

-If we go out to the yard for BBQ or something, she'll often stay in her play room and set up these elaborate imaginary settings with her dolls and toys. There will be chairs set up like a class room, with the dolls as students while she lectures in front of the small chalkboard. Other times there is a wedding or babysitting theme. This isn't uncommon for kids to do, but what gets me is the level of detail in her imaginary world. I like to go in there and ask her questions about whats going on and she'll ramble on and on in meticulous detail about names, positions, why they are doing this or that, who was just here but left to pick up this or that at the store, because its on sale blah blah blah etc.

-She is very sensitive to stimuli. Loud noises, temperature, smells and such all seem to be exaggerated, and she gets headaches easily as a result. She does not take risks lightly, and will often not try things that seem dangerous to her whereas other kids jump right in. She thinks very carefully before taking action.

-There is an artsy-fartsy element to her personality, she told me recently "my dream is to learn piano," but she really has an interest in any instrument so she can "make" music with it, complete with improvised lyrics. She also enjoys writing stories which invariably means making copies and giving them to family members after she reads it to them.

-She is independent, and by that I mean she has her own will that doesn't necessarily submit to the will of adults around her. And so there is often conflict with some family members and teachers who do not understand that some people don't care what they think, not because of disrespect or stubborness, but because she simply has a will of her own and does not like to have it violated, even when she knows there will be consequences. Conflicts are rarely about impulsive things that kids commonly fight about like they want more cake or cry about having to quit playing. It's more often about a lack of caring whether or not authority figures approve of her which really irritates some people. This is my favorite trait of hers which I encourage and often find myself defending.

On the surface this seems like typical child behavior but it is much more explicit with her compared to her sister and their friends. She is also very girly, but I don't know if that means anything.

What were you like as a little INFP girl? Does this sound like you?
 

Oaky

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:D wow that is cute. Just commenting since the question doesn't apply to me.
 

MonkeyGrass

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That sounds a lot like me as a girl...I've found J is something that I developed slowly, so I functioned like a P a lot of the time.

She sounds like a sweetie! :heart:
 

neptunesnet

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Yep. Sounds like me as a child.
It seems as if you let her be herself?
Please encourage that.
I had to go through a lot because ALL except two of my relatives are Sensors, and it took me a long time to accept and appreciate that it was okay for me to be an INFP (although I didn't know that's what I was at the time, but you get the point).
 

rainoneventide

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Cuuute. :) Sounds a lot like how I was when I was young.
I'm really glad you're encouraging her to continue being an individual. I think that will be really important as she grows older--when I was little no one encouraged my independent streak, so I was frequently punished. And yeah that didn't do any good for me.
 

OrangeAppled

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Yes, that sounds very much like me as a child. And consider it a huge flattery that she feels so comfortable with you.
 
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Don't ever let her get too full of herself, lol.
 

runvardh

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Maybe not girly, but yeah. Often, instead of my room it would be out in the bushes and anything I did do in my room was often with my stuffed toys to whom I attributed individual personalities and complex relationships between them. My dad was the family member in the corner with me when at gatherings; but we never talked, just hid and watched.
 

Bubbles

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:blush: Yep. That's kinda everything I was like in a nutshell.

Especially:
-When it comes to conversations, I will ask her something and she'll ramble on forever about anything and everything. But around strangers she is very reserved.

My dream was to be a ballerina, not a pianist though, lol. I thought they were so pretty and elegant! ^^; I didn't listen to authority figures because I always figured I needed a reason to listen before I did, and that didn't always go well... I also played pretend more than anything in the world, especially with dolls.

....Except I dragged my ESFJ sister into those games and not only told her the game's storyline, but also scripted all the characters I supposedly was "letting" her be.

Um, so in short yes! :D
 

Stanton Moore

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Sounds like you have one there. Make sure she gets some 'J' training at some point!
 

OrangeAppled

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I didn't listen to authority figures because I always figured I needed a reason to listen before I did, and that didn't always go well...

Yep, I needed clear reasons also. I didn't have a problem with authoruty as long as arbitrary rules weren't pushed on me. I had to understand the principle and see the value behind everything.

I was lucky to grow up in a family where my mom thought it was important to explain everything as a way of teaching us to reason and to inspire obedience in us even when she wasn't there. I think it tempered my rebellious streak, but I still hate being told what to do, haha.
 

runvardh

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That's probably why I did what I was told most of the time; my mother gave me a reason by exploding like a megaton bomb when things didn't go her way.
 

Alwar

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My dream was to be a ballerina

Ballerina is on her list as well as:

Princess
Mommy
Teacher

Or whatever happens to be of interest at any given time. I keep trying to convince her to become an engineer but she doesn't listen.
 
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Ballerina is on her list as well as:

Princess
Mommy
Teacher

Or whatever happens to be of interest at any given time. I keep trying to convince her to become an engineer but she doesn't listen.

Oop, you nearly missed one INFP characteristic there.
 

runvardh

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Ballerina is on her list as well as:

Princess
Mommy
Teacher

Or whatever happens to be of interest at any given time. I keep trying to convince her to become an engineer but she doesn't listen.

I almost did, but I'm a guy.


Edit: tell her she might find her prince there (I'm NOT saying charming).
 

Alwar

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Doctor and Astronaut won't work either. Why don't she let me impose on her my conception of how she should be? Also, I keep telling her to stop growing but she does anyway.
 

OrangeAppled

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Doctor and Astronaut won't work either. Why don't she let me impose on her my conception of how she should be? Also, I keep telling her to stop growing but she does anyway.

haha...You can certainly influence her, but it has to be through inspiration, not direct suggestions. And there's a good chance she's going to be naturally drawn to certain things over other ones.

I don't think it's a total coincidence I wanted to be a hairdresser as a child, and my aunt was a cool, young hairdresser. I wanted to be a cartoonist, and my step-dad was/is one. I wanted to be a musician, and my dad was/is, and my mom always had loud music playing in the home/car. I wanted to be a poet, and my mom took us to the library like clockwork every 2 weeks. I wanted to be a fashion designer, and my older sis and I would make collages out of her Vogue magazines.

So start surrounding her with doctor and astronaut related stuff to capture her imagination. :tongue:
 

Alwar

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Edit: tell her she might find her prince there (I'm NOT saying charming).

Well I was going to try and convince her to kiss a toad one night when I brought her outside to chase them around after a day of rain. Every time the toad would jump she would recoil in horror though, so I decided there was no way she would try. Once she got a hold of it she was OK until it would squirm then it was follow it around time again.


haha...You can certainly influence her, but it has to be through inspiration, not direct suggestions. And there's a good chance she's going to be naturally drawn to certain things over other ones.

I don't think it's a total coincidence I wanted to be a hairdresser as a child, and my aunt was a cool, young hairdresser. I wanted to be a cartoonist, and my step-dad was/is one. I wanted to be a musician, and my dad was/is, and my mom always had loud music playing in the home/car. I wanted to be a poet, and my mom took us to the library like clockwork every 2 weeks. I wanted to be a fashion designer, and my older sis and I would make collages out of her Vogue magazines.

So start surrounding her with doctor and astronaut related stuff to capture her imagination. :tongue:

:yes:

Yeah one time she watched Lord of the Rings and wanted to be Arwen for like a week until something else caught her interest. Of course she didn't call her "Arwen" but rather, "Princess" because any female wearing a dress is one according to her.
 

Nillerz

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Your niece might be an INFP? That's awful, hope she gets better soon.
 

lost verses

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AHH!
Or whatever happens to be of interest at any given time. I keep trying to convince her to become an engineer but she doesn't listen.

I don't see NFs as really being drawn to, nor enjoying, a career like engineering...just saving you some efforts there LOL
 
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