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[MBTI General] NFPs and Debating, or, Get Your NT on.

rainoneventide

New member
Joined
Jun 15, 2009
Messages
364
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4
The things I feel like debating about are views I hold strongly, and when I have a strong view I tend to... throw it up in the person's face. And then I feel like a huge jerk afterward. Because I usually do become a huge jerk. This probably isn't a surprise, but I never use statistics or anything when I'm debating. Even if I wanted to my memory is too poor, lol.
 

The Outsider

New member
Joined
Feb 3, 2009
Messages
2,418
MBTI Type
intp
Enneagram
5w4
Instinctual Variant
sx
I can enjoy debating with people I like.

More so in real life.
 

jenocyde

half mystic, half skeksis
Joined
Jan 2, 2009
Messages
6,387
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w8
The things I feel like debating about are views I hold strongly, and when I have a strong view I tend to... throw it up in the person's face. And then I feel like a huge jerk afterward. Because I usually do become a huge jerk. This probably isn't a surprise, but I never use statistics or anything when I'm debating. Even if I wanted to my memory is too poor, lol.

And then there are NFs who get very emotionally invested in a topic that it becomes less of a debate, and more hostile.

Thank you for your honesty and self-awareness. I also realize that even though "you" may act jerkish at times, your thoughts and ideas are still 100% valid. And I hope that you all would feel the same way when I act jerkish, as well.
 

ergophobe

Allergic to Mornings
Joined
Apr 26, 2009
Messages
1,210
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
7w6
Oh goodness... I can't possibly suss out all the specifics... A lot more words, I guess... to seem nicer? I don't know. I can be gabby when I am just conversing, but when debating I use as few words as possible in each sentence to be concise and understood (and often get called cold because of it.)

Also, you guys tend to concede more? Meaning, starting a counterargument with "that's a valid point" and other things that I would consider to be filler and a waste of time.

There is a tendency to chastise or remind me that "not all x's are that way, you know", when I think that point is already clear and need not be stated. This always reads as patronizing to me, even though I know that is not always the intent.

I don't know. I guess you guys just seem to go out of your way to be nice, while I go out of my way to be precise. Either way, the differences lie in the packaging but not the content, in most cases.

Definitely notice the difference in verbosity versus brevity. This is absolutely true for NFs versus NTs, in my experience. Just a preference, as you stated. At least in my case, the goal is not to be nice :devil:. It's just naturally expressing the many ways I came to the conclusion. I like sharing some of the process because in my own view, it helps explain my position better.

I think the acknowledgment of points the opponent made also rings true -- not seen as a concession as much as a natural part of discussion. I think the difference here really is not going for a 'win' but understanding the topic better...This may reflect a preference for discussion versus debate. I like both, in the latter, no concessions will be made until the very end, maybe...

Thanks - it's informative to get an outside perspective.
 

Qre:us

New member
Joined
Nov 21, 2008
Messages
4,890
^^ Seeing you debate gets me all hot and bothered. Esp. in the realm of politics. (duh) ;)

It's like cheering for my fave. team, I'm almost euphoric watching you go.

One of my fav. debaters on this site, NF or otherwise.
 

jenocyde

half mystic, half skeksis
Joined
Jan 2, 2009
Messages
6,387
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w8
^^ Seeing you debate gets me all hot and bothered. Esp. in the realm of politics. (duh) ;)

It's like cheering for my fave. team, I'm almost euphoric watching you go.

One of my fav. debaters on this site, NF or otherwise.

+1000
 

Heart&Brain

New member
Joined
Mar 29, 2009
Messages
217
MBTI Type
ENFP
I love a good debate complete with facts and logic and all that. Are there any other NFPs on here that love intellectual sparing, or do heated debates have a tendency to make you feel disharmonious?

Love it. It has even become a parttime occupation. One thing is weird though, a lot of people seem to find me 'sharp', by which those who agree mean intelligent and critical and those who don't agree mean arrogant and even angry. I have speculated that it might have to do with introverted feeling letting Ne and Te do the talking?

I am very smiling and friendly, I never use ad hominem attacks and get seriously offended if my opponent does. I don't mind agreeing with an opponent if she/he is right and I am not in debate to get a personal one-up but to get to 'the true and the good' together. Which is the same reason I call BS if I sense it, laugh when I hear ridiculous arguments and never do nicities and harmonising moves of compromise. The true and good would loose if I did.

I've heard a few times that if I had been a male nobody would be surprised or offended by my debating style, but me being (a quite 'feminine') female somehow make for different (largely unconscious I suppose) expectations of how I'll behave in a confrontation of ideas.
Some love the ignorance of gender roles, some are very much provoked and interpret my 'merciless' style as a personal attack on them. Weird. Really, it weirds me out, because I don't feel any anger or contempt at those times. Just enthusiasm, being involved and honest about giving my best shot.

Could it be that such weird experiences are what people with Te as Dom or Aux report as being misunderstood by 'Feelers' taking their impersonal logic personally?
 

ergophobe

Allergic to Mornings
Joined
Apr 26, 2009
Messages
1,210
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
7w6
^^ Seeing you debate gets me all hot and bothered. Esp. in the realm of politics. (duh) ;)

It's like cheering for my fave. team, I'm almost euphoric watching you go.

One of my fav. debaters on this site, NF or otherwise.


Awww shucks....:blush:

The mutual love and admiration is quite overwhelming :hug:
 
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