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[ENFP] ENFP: tired of being me

Avocado

Permabanned
Joined
Jun 28, 2013
Messages
3,794
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
7w6
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
I commented on this earlier, but I just read the whole thread and felt like commenting again. It's good to hear from ENFP kindred. You all understand. :heart:

Sometimes I really wish I weren't an ENFP. Sometimes it feels like we're wired to be the least socially-adjusted, least productive, least independent people. Sometimes it feels like I have no control over my emotions, or my environment. Sometimes I wish I could just approach the world at face value instead of being so affected by implied meanings. Sometimes I wish I was better at being sure of my commitments, that I didn't care what others thought, or that I could just take an hours-long drive alone and not desperately need human interaction again once it was over.

But then sometimes... I'm so glad I care about relationships. My family means the world to me and I try to be a good daughter, sister, granddaughter, and girlfriend, and I'm proud of that. I wish I had time to properly love and care for everyone in the world. I'm so glad I'm concerned about whether everyone is having a good time because I tend to pick up on the people who are being left out or who are feeling particularly down, and I'm good at drawing them back in. I love how I see the world as imbued with magic because I do look for the deeper meanings. It's incredible the sort of patterns that run deep throughout the veins of existence. I like that I can't take a surface-level conversation and not veer it into a conversation about whatever means most in that other person's life, because I think it's important to talk about what matters. I'm glad I'm a future planner and have a hard time stagnating. I'm glad I seek others' acceptance because it has taught me how to connect with all sorts of people and how to reconcile very different points of view. I'm glad I can't be alone for too long because I want to use my life to help others, and I'm probably not being very useful in that way if I'm alone.

Being an ENFP can be so hard but it can also be so rewarding. I can't imagine giving up my warm fuzzy feelings of connection, which to me are the soul of existence. As much as I've fantasized about being some perfectly polished J, I'm also learning how the more I reach into myself to nourish who I am, the more I'm becoming who I want to be. It's like it's already coded into us and we just have to listen and trust that we have the power within ourselves to be everything we need.

Very well said…
 
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