[NF] Do you care how others feel?

[Eileen]

I care how others feel, but I also have an aversion to coddling overly sensitive people.

 

[Lookin4theBestNU]

How much do you care how others feel?
In light of the idea that you can't control how others feel, how much should you really care?

I suppose if you were to consider awareness and caring to be linked then I care way too much. I am more aware then I would like to be honestly. I think being less aware would make life easier sometimes. I have a caring shut-off switch though which I assume is the function of FJ.

You can control how other people feel to an extent. I have done it without knowing it until later more times than I would like to admit. Manipulation once I become aware makes me feel extremely guilty even though it was unintentional. I generally cannot stand to feel that way so I will usually try to correct this as best as I can.

 

[Shimpei]

When does minding others feelings cross the line over into manipulation? Or maybe I should ask does minding others feelings ever cross into manipulating them?

You can get someone you care for to fall in you (www.lovetactics.com). Some people think it's manipulation, whereas others think it's more like a win-win situation.

Why? What would be the purpose of stopping someone from feeling good about their self?

When someone does hurt to another one or causes damage, he needs to feel shame and guilt not to do it again.

 

[rivercrow]

You can get someone you care for to fall in you (www.lovetactics.com). Some people think it's manipulation, whereas others think it's more like a win-win situation.

This is a chilling concept to me. I've met folks who think like this, too--had one as an in-law--and I still get shivers about it.

 

[Shimpei]

This is a chilling concept to me. I've met folks who think like this, too--had one as an in-law--and I still get shivers about it.

Yeah, on one hand it's creepy, on the other hand it sucks the mystery and excitement out of the whole mating game.

 

[Siúil a Rúin]

You can get someone you care for to fall in you (www.lovetactics.com). Some people think it's manipulation, whereas others think it's more like a win-win situation.

That is disturbing, but if it works for this guy....

It must really work.



RUN LIKE HELL!!!

 

[cafe]

That is disturbing, but if it works for this guy....

It must really work.

Heh. They could call it Creepy Relationship Methods for Creepy People.

 

[Littlelostnf]

I am very aware of how people feel and if caring and being in tune with peoples feeling is the same than WHOA...I care...alot. However I also know that I can only do so much. If I go to far in trying to control others and how they feel than it smacks of manipulation and that is something I could do but I try VERY hard not to. I do try really hard to do something about my caring but when it's time to shut it off I've learned that I'll be the unhappy/stressed one in the end if I don't.

 

[hereandnow]

Any ideas, thoughts, feelings?
How much do you care?

Good questions AC. I'd say I care very little in general. However, for the few for whom I have love for I'd do anything and love them a great deal.

 

[targobelle]

So I said I cared about how others feel and well I do. I admit that clingy needy people are a huge turn off but I still care that they feel that way. I don't like it when others emotions over ride everything else.

Also being a 'natural' mother I always want to 'fix' things and people

 

[Dansker]

I do care a lot about those who are close to me, and I don't like to see them upset or distressed.

When someone's reasons for feeling a certain way makes sense to me, I am much better at caring, however this doesn't mean I will show I care. Where their reasons seem illogical or don't make sense to me I tend to care much less, if at all.

I don't like to be around overly emotional, sensitive or clingy people; I find it draining and exhausting.

 

[nightning]

I care about the well-being of people in general... and because I care, sometimes I hold myself apart, let them fix their own problems because fixing it for them isn't going to help them in the long run. There are also people out there that are beyond help, or that they don't think they need help. *shrugs* I don't care overly much about those and just move on.

I used to be, probably still am, quite sensitive about opinions of other people. I have defined too much of myself based on qualities other people find worthwhile rather than what I personally would like to be. I have to keep on telling myself that me, myself, and I is more important than other people. *sigh* Still fighting the impulse that caring more for oneself than other people isn't selfishness. That it's okay to do so.

 

[Crabapple]

Hmmmm....

I care about those I love and admire; I want them to look upon me with positive feelings. I also care about people in the world in general- like I am affected by disasters in the world and want to help.
I'd say I care less about the opinions of society. Actually, I tend to find the opinions of society maddening.

 

[wyrdsister]

I am compassionate towards others feelings but can still be quite selfish as to putting my own feelings first, so as not to be overwhelmed or swamped by the feelings of others.

 

[niffer]

for me, caring = doing something.

i care if i can do something about whatever is making them feel unhappy. if i can't, i go a little nuts, but eventually just ignore it. everyone suffers.

if they reach out to me, or think that i can do something for them, then i will. if they refuse to reach out and they're not that close to me anyways, then i'll assume that they don't even care if they suffer themselves, or that they think i can't help them/don't understand, and i'll dismiss them as lost cases until they change.

i only care about what people that are close to me think about me. i am pressured by myself to care about other non-close-peoples' opinions about me, but i can always overcome this. at least for a little while xD

 

[SolitaryWalker]

I guess this is an NF type topic.
How much do you care how others feel?
In light of the idea that you can't control how others feel, how much should you really care?

Frankly, I enjoy caring about others... But there are times when I decide NOT to give a darn. Actually, I am leaning towards the understanding that in caring about my own feelings, its best to focus on them, and let others manage their own emotions...

Sometimes it feels like being a bad guy, but it seems important to staying happy.

Any ideas, thoughts, feelings?
How much do you care?

I really dont. Not that I consciously got out of my way to make others miserable, but I prefer to keep emotions out of my life. Those who dont should know that no attention to their emotions from me does not equate to negative attention.

 

[niffer]

i don't really separate thinking and feeling within myself. i just caluculate everything using a little scale in my head to see if it is all legitimate, and then i react.

 

[niffer]

one more thing: i don't give a flying poo about people i don't know personally, such as that Send Shane a Card thing. that's what his family is for. why would i care about him if i've never even seen him live, or had a conversation with him?

another example of something like this is when those 30-odd students got shot up in Virginia. half the people on my msn contacts list put an emoticon flower in front of their screen name. "if you don't you're heartless. it's just respectful." they said. aren't those Virginia Tech students too busy being DEAD to go on msn? also, i don't think anyone i know has any of the friends or family of those students on their contacts list. they will NEVER see that BEAUTIFUL, PIXELATED flower that they SLAVED for days and nights to put up onto the screen. it's so insincere, it's just hilarious. if anyone honestly cares, then they should send a personal letter to someone in Virginia. people die every day, so they might as well leave that flower up forever then.

those flowers can kiss my ass.

 

[wyrdsister]

I really dont. Not that I consciously got out of my way to make others miserable, but I prefer to keep emotions out of my life. Those who dont should know that no attention to their emotions from me does not equate to negative attention.

Good luck with that. As you are neither Spock nor Data I would imagine that this causes a lot of conflict within you.

 

[Eileen]

Good luck with that. As you are neither Spock nor Data I would imagine that this causes a lot of conflict within you.

Be fair: He might be Spock or Data. We don't know.