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  1. #11
    nevermore lane777's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by revolve View Post
    lane 777, here's my reasons for thinking he's an INFJ:

    1) gave him the test & he came out INFJ
    2) he has a degree in fine arts
    3) he currently works with developmentally disabled children
    4) he LOVES animals & nature (loves camping)
    5) he is really good at chess & loves it
    6) he has deep penetrating eyes that "move" me just looking into them - woah!
    7) he was a vegetarian for a while
    8) his best friends are an INTP & ENFJ
    9) he used to have a drug problem

    i could say more . . . but i am convinced by all of this
    1) Tests are useless.
    2) Not INFJ exclusive
    3) Not INFJ exclusive
    4) Not INFJ exclusive
    5) Not INFJ exclusive
    6) We are known for that aren't we? Still not a deal sealer though
    7) Not INFJ exclusive
    8) Irrelevant
    9) Irrelevant

    I would need more information, but your best bet would be to consider the ISFJ INFJ's are often mistaken for ISFJ's (as are INFP's - but given that he doesn't care for the abstract or theory world, I'd skip it).
    To die would be an awfully big adventure - Peter Pan

    INFJ ~ 4w5 sp/sx ~ RLOAI ~ Inclusion e/w=1/0 (Melancholy Compulsive) Control: e/w=0/6 (Supine) Affection: e/w=4/0 (Phlegmatic Melancholy)

  2. #12
    nevermore lane777's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BlackCat View Post
    Yeah... That doesn't have much to do with S. My last girlfriend was an INFP and we didn't have any soulful or deep conversations... or much of a "connection".
    Yes it does (although there are exceptions).

    N vs S
    To die would be an awfully big adventure - Peter Pan

    INFJ ~ 4w5 sp/sx ~ RLOAI ~ Inclusion e/w=1/0 (Melancholy Compulsive) Control: e/w=0/6 (Supine) Affection: e/w=4/0 (Phlegmatic Melancholy)

  3. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by proteanmix View Post
    OK, he's an S or seems like one because you can't have deep, soulful conversations?

    Am I getting this right?
    yes proteanmix you are getting this right

  4. #14
    Revelation Lauren Ashley's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lane777 View Post
    Yes it does (although there are exceptions).

    N vs S
    "Soulful" and "deep" are relative and vague terms. It depends on who is making them. I don't see Sensors as having any less depth of feeling, but the way they express this is different from an Intuitive.

  5. #15
    Plumage and Moult proteanmix's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by revolve View Post
    yes proteanmix you are getting this right
    Is everyone you can't have a soulful conversation with an S?
    Relationships have normal ebbs and flows. They do not automatically get better and better when the participants learn more and more about each other. Instead, the participants have to work through the tensions of the relationship (the dialectic) while they learn and group themselves and a parties in a relationships. At times the relationships is very open and sharing. Other time, one or both parties to the relationship need their space, or have other concerns, and the relationship is less open. The theory posits that these cycles occur throughout the life of the relationship as the persons try to balance their needs for privacy and open relationship.
    Interpersonal Communication Theories and Concepts
    Social Penetration Theory 1
    Social Penetration Theory 2
    Social Penetration Theory 3

  6. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lauren Ashley View Post
    "Soulful" and "deep" are relative and vague terms. It depends on who is making them. I don't see Sensors as having any less depth of feeling, but the way they express this is different from an Intuitive.
    I know I know . . . and i agree with you but I guess that "intuitive way" of expressing is very important to me in a significant other . . . i'm just having doubts, frustration, insecurity . . . i don't know what i'm talking about ever . . . bleh! feeling panicky & you guys are great - thanks for your insight. don't want to date anyone . . . i think i'll just drop his ass . . .

  7. #17
    Revelation Lauren Ashley's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by revolve View Post
    I know I know . . . and i agree with you but I guess that "intuitive way" of expressing is very important to me in a significant other . . . i'm just having doubts, frustration, insecurity . . . i don't know what i'm talking about ever . . . bleh! feeling panicky & you guys are great - thanks for your insight. don't want to date anyone . . . i think i'll just drop his ass . . .
    Have you spoken to him about this?

  8. #18
    4x9 cascadeco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by revolve View Post
    i guess that i'm used to connecting with my best friends & ex's through the introverted feeling function that we all shared (ISFPs, INFPs, ENFPs) & there is just something "missing" with the INFJ that I am not used to . . .
    I don't really want to debate whether your boyfriend is an INFJ or instead an ISFJ, but just want to point out that the manner in which you would 'connect' with Fi dom's would be pretty different from the manner with which you connect with non-Fi doms. For example, I can get into incredibly deep conversations with my fellow INFJ's, and NT types, but there is definitely a difference with those who are more Fi dominant. It is not that there is a lack of ability to connect in a deep and meaningful way, but rather that we speak different languages and it's not nearly so automatic as it is for me with others. It may be that he doesn't know how to engage you at the level he wants, and it's just the combination of your two personalities/dispositions. But really, I don't know. That's just another possibility.

    But as to your list of why you think he's INFJ, I agree with lane that those items aren't really type specific.
    "...On and on and on and on he strode, far out over the sands, singing wildly to the sea, crying to greet the advent of the life that had cried to him." - James Joyce

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  9. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by proteanmix View Post
    Is everyone you can't have a soulful conversation with an S?
    i have been close to a lot of "S" & my ex of 9 years was an ISFP & he always wants me back & I guess I just came here with this thread because the ISFP is stressin' me out with his always being there for me business / & it makes me doubt the direction I am going in . . . with the INFJ . . . I so hate being an ENFP . . . i feel like ya'll all think I am crazy & dumb . . . "the story of my life" . . . good day!

  10. #20
    nevermore lane777's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lauren Ashley View Post
    "Soulful" and "deep" are relative and vague terms. It depends on who is making them. I don't see Sensors as having any less depth of feeling, but the way they express this is different from an Intuitive.
    Quote Originally Posted by revolve View Post
    all of our conversations are quite "sensory"
    That's what I was going by, actually She was making a definite statement, so I just went with it.
    To die would be an awfully big adventure - Peter Pan

    INFJ ~ 4w5 sp/sx ~ RLOAI ~ Inclusion e/w=1/0 (Melancholy Compulsive) Control: e/w=0/6 (Supine) Affection: e/w=4/0 (Phlegmatic Melancholy)

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