I really found the advice to not take on the guilt of the world insightful or dwell on dark thoughts.
Any advice on how to not "take on the guilt of the world"? And what did you notice or hear in the ENFJ's to discover this about them. I feel like no one know this about me? Maybe they do...
Great thread I want to hear more advice.
Both my ENFJ pals IRL, for one thing, will immediately absorb anything negative someone says about them. They immediately start checking themselves to see what that person saw in them to make them say the terrible thing. Part of it is a strong guilt trigger, I think, and part of it is the inability to see when folks are lashing out at them because of their OWN (the lasher's) insecurites/agenda.
I've spent many an evening explaining to one of my ENFJs that, for example, just because the neighbor called you a lonely old bitch after you reported her for making significant noise in the apartment above you for 2 straight weeks, doesn't mean that you are, in fact, irrevocably and undeniably a lonely old bitch, and that that person must have seen some of that in you, or why would she have said it. Um, because you turned her in and she's mad, that's why. She wants to get back at you, to hurt you. Don't look for truth and insight where there is none. Don't take on the negativity and spend two weeks deeply examining yourself because of a comment from someone that means nothing to you.
Also, sometimes things don't go our way in life. Resist the urge to feel like it's just you, and you must have done something to deserve it, or else things would be going better. There are a million factors to explain any situation. If the job market's bad, you might not get your dream job right away. But, hey. Neither will most people. Don't dwell on what you must be doing wrong, and wish for someone else's life, when that person might be struggling, too--just in a different way.
Those are the examples I can think of for right now. Both my RL ENFJ friends are prone to that mindset--I couldn't tell if you were saying you could relate, or you couldn't?