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[Fi] Is Fi an emo mirror?

sculpting

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So on the Fi and Fe quizzes the following were qestions asked:

Fi": "I assess other people’s emotional states by reading my own internal reactions."

Fe: "I assess others people emotional states by watching thier behavior"



If I understand correctly this is one of the main differences between the two functions.

I wanted to describe what Fi is like for me and see if this sounds familiar to other Fi using folks. I could be an utter freakshow.

For me, Fi acts like an emo mirror. If I am relaxed and open, not blocking with Te or trying to emotional detach from the situation, if I see someone having an emotion, on some level I mirror that emotion myself.

So if you are happy, then I "feel" happy. I assume that this is a true physiological cascade of chemical hormones, and it truly constitutes a real emotion.

If you are in sad, I "feel" your sadness.
If you are in emotional or physical pain, I "feel" your pain. It can really hurt.
If you are in love with me, then it would make it very easy for me to "feel" in love with you.

Of course there is the very real danger I will not correctly perceive what you actually feel, and my emo response will not correctly mirror what you are really feeling.

But other Fi users, does this sound accurate?
 

/DG/

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This reminds my of sympathy/empathy. I'm not sure which, though, because I get my definitions mixed up. :/
 

BlahBlahNounBlah

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When someone is genuinely hurting ... in genuine distress (note which word I'm emphasizing here), I feel all of it. And I cannot turn it off.
 

sculpting

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I had this discussion with an entp friend-a super Fe user.

I explained exactly what I said above and he said "Oh I totally know what you mean, if I seem someone getting socially embarrassed I feel so bad for them." It was so enlightening about how Fe works for him.

Blah, do you internally sense the pain they are in-if they are sad do you then feel sad? How can you tell it is genuine?
 

BlueScreen

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This reminds my of sympathy/empathy. I'm not sure which, though, because I get my definitions mixed up. :/

Fi empathy, Fe sympathy

at least by the definitions at the start of the thread.

Wikipedia said:
Sympathy is a social affinity in which one person stands with another person, closely understanding his or her feelings. It also can mean being affected by feelings or emotions. Thus the essence of sympathy is that one has a strong concern for the other person. Sympathy exists when the feelings or emotions of one person are deeply understood and appreciated by another person.

Empathy is the capability to share and understand another's emotions and feelings. It is often characterized as the ability to "put oneself into another's shoes," Empathy does not necessarily imply compassion, sympathy, or empathic concern because this capacity can be present in context of compassionate or cruel behavior.
 

BlahBlahNounBlah

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I had this discussion with an entp friend-a super Fe user.

I explained exactly what I said above and he said "Oh I totally know what you mean, if I seem someone getting socially embarrassed I feel so bad for them." It was so enlightening about how Fe works for him.

Blah, do you internally sense the pain they are in-if they are sad do you then feel sad? How can you tell it is genuine?


Logical observation usually tells me it's genuine (sometimes my observation is wrong).


If I sense falseness, I feel nothing. Not sympathy, not empathy ... nothing.


Also, I can feel what someone else is feeling, extremely strongly, but simply choose not to act on it. If I care for someone, but I think it would be a bad idea to do that, I'll keep my distance despite my feelings.
 

Mondo

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Can't one use Fi and Fe equally- using the two as one to assess a person's emotional state?
 

BlueScreen

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Logical observation usually tells me it's genuine (sometimes my observation is wrong).


If I sense falseness, I feel nothing. Not sympathy, not empathy ... nothing.


Also, I can feel what someone else is feeling, extremely strongly, but simply choose not to act on it. If I care for someone, but I think it would be a bad idea to do that, I'll keep my distance despite my feelings.

I was about to post about it. It is Ne. Having clear perception of the situation gives you empathy effectively. You know what is happening and where they are at. We stare it down less easily because of the Fi processing. From what I know Ti can look at it from a more detached perspective, Fi is standing in the fire.
 

Udog

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Ne-Monster, you are very likely insane, but I pretty much agree with you here. :D

Here's the breakdown:
1) Person emotes
2) The emotion resonates within me. It doesn't usually affect my mood, but I still feel it.
3) Since I recognize the emotion in me, I can identify it.
4) I use this knowledge to identify how they feel.

Four problems that can occur:
1) I incorrectly misinterpret the gesture for the emotion it was trying to emulate.
2) I correctly identify the emotion, but misinterpret the reason behind the emotion.
3) I can't relate to whatever they are feeling.
4) The person's emotions fail to resonate within me, leaving me clueless and unable to get a read.
 

Mondo

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Ne-monster: From your description of Fe and Fi, Fe almost sounds more objective than Fi.
Fe relies on observable behavior while Fi relies on personal reactions- which are subjective in nature.
As an ENTP, I guess I use both equally.. I'll try to figure out what a person is thinking or how a person is feeling based on his or her behavior and try to read behind the lines.. which I often use my internal reactions to a situation as a guide...
 

OrangeAppled

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Ne-Monster, you are very likely insane, but I pretty much agree with you here. :D

Here's the breakdown:
1) Person emotes
2) The emotion resonates within me. It doesn't usually affect my mood, but I still feel it.
3) Since I recognize the emotion in me, I can identify it.
4) I use this knowledge to identify how they feel.

Four problems that can occur:
1) I incorrectly misinterpret the gesture for the emotion it was trying to emulate.
2) I correctly identify the emotion, but misinterpret the reason behind the emotion.
3) I can't relate to whatever they are feeling.
4) The person's emotions fail to resonate within me, leaving me clueless and unable to get a read.


This sounds right :yes:. Udog hits the nail on the head again ;)

Quite honestly, I am not personally affected by another person's emotions. I know what they feel, I don't feel what they feel. I can identify their emotion, but in that moment I do not take on their emotion. If someone is sad, I can recognize it and put myself in their shoes and see why they feel that way, but it does not necessarily make me sad. In some ways, I feel almost detached when doing this. So, no, I don't feel I mirror other's emotions as the OP seems to be saying.
 

BlackCat

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Can't one use Fi and Fe equally- using the two as one to assess a person's emotional state?

That's what I do, how I feel that they are feeling and going by their behavior.
 

Udog

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Quite honestly, I am not personally affected by another person's emotions. I know what they feel, I don't feel what they feel. I can identify their emotion, but in that moment I do not take on their emotion. If someone is sad, I can recognize it and put myself in their shoes and see why they feel that way, but it does not necessarily make me sad. In some ways, I feel almost detached when doing this. So, no, I don't feel I mirror other's emotions as the OP seems to be saying.

Yeah, this is a good distinction to make. As far as someone's mood affecting me, it does to minor extents. Let's call it a 20:1 ratio just because we can. So if someone is sad, it can chip away at my more positive mood, but not upset me.

Exception: If I'm stressed. Then my empathy can bleed over and affect me.
 
G

Glycerine

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So are Fi users much more aware of how they themselves are feeling so they can usually empathize and relate to how the other person is feeling because they have experienced the emotion personally but don't usually "absorb" the other person's emotion like a sponge? As a Fe user, if someone gets "mad", I start to actually feel the emotion of "mad" but then when I get away, I start to wonder why the hell was I so mad.
As one poster said, Fi has more protective measures than Fe so the Fi user knows what he or she feels so he or she won't let external forces affect quite as much (since its internal). The actual mirroring of feelings and emotions sounds more Fe from the examples shown in the OP because the Fe user is externally focused with values. Please correct me if I am wrong. However, there seems to be a blurred line between the types of Feeling. I know of couple of Fi doms that have adapted Fe type of traits and I have adapted Fi type of traits from very strong NFP influences so it's never clearcut.
 

OrangeAppled

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So are Fi users much more aware of how they themselves are feeling so they can usually empathize and relate to how the other person is feeling because they have experienced the emotion personally but don't usually "absorb" the other person's emotion like a sponge? As a Fe user, if someone gets "mad", I start to actually feel the emotion of "mad" but then when I get away, I start to wonder why the hell was I so mad.
As one poster said, Fi has more protective measures than Fe so the Fi user knows what he or she feels so he or she won't let external forces affect quite as much (since its internal). The actual mirroring of feelings and emotions sounds more Fe from the examples shown in the OP because the Fe user is externally focused with values. Please correct me if I am wrong. However, there seems to be a blurred line between the types of Feeling. I know of couple of Fi doms that have adapted Fe type of traits and I have adapted Fi type of traits from very strong NFP influences so it's never clearcut.


I would agree with that :yes:. I feel I can empathize without losing myself in their emotion. I agree with Udog in that I am not totally immune to being affected, but I generally keep my own mood.
 

The Outsider

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I agree with you, Ne-Monster.
 

BerberElla

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I can't switch off the mirror, I honestly feel a persons sadness like it's my own sadness even if I don't know that person.

I can't read a news report and not feel the emotions that I imagine the victim or victims family might be feeling for instance. It's so easy for me to put myself in their shoes.

Thankfully knowing about different types has made me clue into Fe more because I need to watch them to see if infact they are feeling what I would be feeling if I was in their shoes.

Mind you though, I never went wrong with using Fi to assess a persons emotional state before, even if they are different types I have been quite correct and connected to that nugget of them that feels what it is I imagine they are feeling that they haven't yet recognised within themselves yet.

But with using some Fe now I can double check to be sure.
 

sculpting

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Glad I am not totally alone on this one.

Thanks for the vote of confidence Udog! ;) It's good to know others see me as I see myself.... ?

I wonder if Ne makes this whole Fi mirror thing even worse.

IDK123's comments are really interesting though as I thought Fe sort of watched from the outside.

I can block it two ways. One is if I am on a Te mission. I can hurt or watch other pwople hurt, feel thier pain but ignore it, as I understand that their small amount of perceived suffering is for the better of the whole group. I often have to do this at work. This is short term though, as Te requires a lot of energy and later I feel guilty.

The other way is more confusing for me-I think I may be using Ti rather than Fi. I emotionally detach and rationalize what I see. I rationalize to block the emotion. It effectively isolates the Fi, but also leaves me numb without any feelings at all. I become a bit machine like. I think this may be a learned defense mechanism.
 

Amargith

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I can't switch off the mirror, I honestly feel a persons sadness like it's my own sadness even if I don't know that person.

I can't read a news report and not feel the emotions that I imagine the victim or victims family might be feeling for instance. It's so easy for me to put myself in their shoes.

Thankfully knowing about different types has made me clue into Fe more because I need to watch them to see if infact they are feeling what I would be feeling if I was in their shoes.

Mind you though, I never went wrong with using Fi to assess a persons emotional state before, even if they are different types I have been quite correct and connected to that nugget of them that feels what it is I imagine they are feeling that they haven't yet recognised within themselves yet.

But with using some Fe now I can double check to be sure.



+10000

I used to be unable to turn off the mirror, especially when the emotions coming from the person were incredibly intense. I'd no longer know where my emotions started and theirs ended. I've gotten a bit better at it but the more intense the harder it is to keep that division. I do verify everytime, as I might get the emotions right but not the reason behind it, which I use Ne for. If for instance I cannot relate to their way of thinking/viewing the world, it can take several tries before I get how they view the world and where this emotion actually fits in.

Also very much identify with the bolded part. Often people will tell me I'm mistaken in the moment, but tell me afterwards that I was right afterall, though I'm not claiming to be infallable. If they tell me in the moment that I'm wrong, I will ask follow up questions to verify and also use Fe to do so and if i turn out to be wrong it's indeed often the interpretation that I fumbled up. But if I again come to the same conclusion as the first time, I'll drop the matter, as I don't consider it worth the headache to prove I'm right.
 
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